


Right Foot

by rosemary22



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), Insecure Lance (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Keith (Voltron) is a Mess, Lance (Voltron) is a Dork, M/M, Nonbinary Pidge | Katie Holt, Pidge | Katie Holt is a Good Friend, Some Cursing, half brazilian lance, keith is a dumb gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-27
Updated: 2018-10-19
Packaged: 2019-06-17 08:53:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 72,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15457710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosemary22/pseuds/rosemary22
Summary: Keith had been a fan of the band "The Paladins" ever since he first met them when he was 15. Fifteen years old Keith would've never imagine his older brother, Shiro, would have been invited to play with The Paladins. Fifteen years old Keith would've never imagined he would have gotten a backstage pass. Fifteen years old Keith would've never imagined he would have met The Paladins' lead vocal: Lance McClain. Twenty two years old Keith was the luckiest man alive. Twenty two years old Keith was probably fucked, but he was, undoubtedly, the luckiest man alive.(AU inspired by the song "Pé Direito", by Mc Davi. The name of the fic comes from a literal translation of the song title and the idea of the expression "to start off on the right foot".)Rated as Explicit for a blowjob on Chapter 6.





	1. Right Foot

**Author's Note:**

> hellon, youngsters, how are y'all doing? this is my first voltron fic and i've heard rumours that the fandom can be kinda intense, so take it easy on me, alright?  
> important things: i add brazilian/half brazilian headcanons in every single thing i write, so expect something like that in this fic. ALSO the age gaps are NOT the same as in canon. lance, keith and huk are 22, allura and lotor are 24, matt is 26, shiro is 27 and pidge is 21.  
> anyway, i hope you enjoy the fic! <3 
> 
> (p.s.: thank you tumblr user @maurice-1987 for helping me with this whole thing <3)

Keith took a deep breath staring at his phone screen. He could feel his brows frowned and jaw clenched. It had to be some sort of joke, right? What were the odds of that actually happening to him? It was way beyond any luck he’d ever had in his life. Besides, a whole week had passed since he had the best night of his life and nothing had gone out of that, so...

He shook his head, answered the person who had texted him with “I’m free tonight” and locked his phone, burrowing his head on his pillow again and groaning as loudly as he felt like he should. He had been awake for almost an hour staring at that text. Keith woke up with his alarm ringing and as soon as he stopped it the locked screen of his phone let him know he had received a text from an unknown number during the night.

Before he read the text he rolled his eyes: who would be texting him at 3am? Why on earth would someone be awake at 3am from Thursday to Friday? Some people had lives that Keith would never understand... So he finally unlocked his phone and read the text and it took him an hour to process the information.

A week prior Keith was sure he was the luckiest man alive. When he read that text he was sure he was either luck itself or being pranked. After finishing freaking out on his own pillow Keith decided to leave the room and go on with his Friday. He considered questioning Shiro, his roommate and brother, about the text, but he didn’t. If it was a prank he doubted it was Shiro’s doing. And Shiro would probably try poisoning whoever did that, which wasn’t advisable. Besides, Shiro wouldn’t be awake by then since he had probably gotten home very late the other night. That was exactly the sort of person who would be awake at that time of the night on a weekday: musicians.

Keith made himself some green tea while trying not to think about anything other than the text he’d received, so he wouldn't freak out and could get used to it, but his brain had different plans for him. So he ended up letting his mind wander back to that night a week ago.

Shiro had gotten home with a wide smile on his face and Keith knew that meant trouble.

“No.” Keith looked away, but Shiro held his arm. “I have a thing tonight, Shiro.”

“I know. Mourning.” Shiro’s smile widened, which definitely meant trouble. Keith sighed; he wasn’t going to morn, he was just sad he couldn’t go to his favourite band’s concert that night. “Promise you won’t get angry at me. I had to keep it all a secret until it was sure.”

“Sure... What is it?” Keith sighed again and Shiro chuckled.

“You know how I’ve been out on secret rehearsals a lot lately?” Shiro let go of Keith, who crossed his arms in front of his chest and nodded. “Well... Tonight will be _the night_. And I want you to be there.” Shiro got some things from his pocket and handed them over to Keith. “There’s the ticked and a V.I.P. pass to backstage so you can support your big brother from close distance.” Keith grabbed them and examined the items. His eyes widened and his jaw dropped. Shiro’s laugh sounded like a roar.

“Are you fucking _kidding_ me?” Keith’s voice was higher than the usual. “Oh my God. Oh my God? Shiro, what-“ Keith looked at Shiro and then back at the ticket. “How the fuck? What the fuck? You didn’t tell me? Why didn’t you tell me? You fucker, I-“

“Hey, I couldn’t.” Shiro laughed again. “So, are you coming?”

“If I’m going? What do you _think_? Are you serious? Please tell me everything!” Keith more demanded than asked.

“Matt.” Shiro said as if that explained things. It didn’t. “I met Matt in one of the festivals I played at, right? Before The Paladins were big at all.” Keith knew. That was exactly the same day he had fallen in love with that band. “So when the Lotor thing blew up they had to figure something out so they didn’t have to cancel the shows Matt called me to help.” Keith’s eyes were even wider. “He promised me not to tell anyone. It was good for the marketing, I guess?”

“It was incredible for the marketing. We’ve been going fucking insane speculating how they were going to rearrange everything without Lotor. Who they’d put in his place...” Keith shook his head. “I can’t believe you haven’t told me.”

“I couldn’t.” Shiro’s smile was less wicked and Keith sighed. “But look what I got you!”

“You can’t buy my forgiveness, Takashi Shirogane.” Keith narrowed his eyes. “But I’ll think about it.” Shiro chuckled.

“I have to be there earlier, so I’ll leave some money for an Uber.” Keith gasped.

“I love you, Shiro.” Shiro rolled his eyes.

“As soon as the concert is over, wait for a while and go to the nearest security guard. Show them your pass and they’ll guide you backstage.” Shiro was still smiling. “Sorry I haven’t told you.” Keith smiled at him faintly.

“So, fangirling aside... Is this a temporary thing or...” Keith asked, being as objectively as possible. They _were_ discussing his brother being a part of his _favourite_ band of all times. “And you’re the drummer, right? What about Hunk?”

“I have a temporary contract with them, yes. For the local tour. We’ll be playing in four venues in the state in two weeks and for the country-tour... Well, they’re still figuring things out, I suppose?” Shiro frowned a bit. “I mean, there is a small chance that I might be with them for the rest of the tour... Until they find the time for auditions for a new bassist? I... Can’t discuss this in depts... Sorry.” Keith shook his head. “So. I don’t get a hug?” Shiro opened his arms wide and Keith rolled his eyes, but gave in, smiling against Shiro’s t-shirt.

“Thanks, Shiro. You’re the best brother in the universe.” Keith hugged him tight and Shiro laughed again.

In the kitchen, a week later, in the morning, Keith sipped his tea and wondered what he should eat for breakfast. He decided oatmeal was a good choice and started making some for himself, still letting his mind keep wandering through the previous week’s events.

He had dressed as well as he could. Black skinny jeans, tight as sin and ripped at the knees, a black sleeveless shirt buttoned up to the top, his dark red Doc Martens and his old black leather jacket - with two stripes, a white and a red, on each arm, near the elbows. After a shower, a lot of double and triple checking if he had gotten all of his belongings, he called his Uber. Keith looked good. And he looked murderous. Which was not exactly the scene he was going to, but he didn’t care. The Paladins played a variation of genres, but they most of their songs had some 80s rock to it, so Keith was going to be fine.

The concert was amazing, despite Keith having not stayed that close to the stage. Shiro had gotten him tickets for a sitting place at the venue, which had probably been for the best since if it depended on Keith, he would had joined the first mosh he saw being formed. And he had seen a few of them from where he was. But he was going backstage after, so it was probably better not to have any open wounds or visible bruises when doing so.

Every song was his favourite and he had to remind himself to watch Shiro on the drums more than just a couple of times. The band was showing an interesting dynamic on stage with their new formation and, apparently, all of the fans were digging it. Shiro _was_ a wonderful drummer, so he was doing great in Hunk’s place.

Hunk was playing the bass, which used to be Lotor’s place in the band. Keith sighed thinking about the days he had spent thinking the band was going to be over when they kicked Lotor out. Turns out he was involved in some shady stuff - the public didn’t exactly know what it was, so the fans and the press mostly speculated over it than actually knew something about it. Keith should have asked Shiro earlier...

The rest of the formation was the usual: Pidge would alternate between the guitar and the keyboard, Matt would play the guitar and do some backing vocals. The lead vocalist was Lance McClain. A tall, dark skinned, blue eyed man with legs for days and the voice of an angel. Keith couldn’t get enough of his singing; Keith couldn’t get enough of the way he moved on stage. Lance was the main reason Keith was absolutely in love with The Paladins.

From day one, when Lance wasn’t even that good with the crowd, he had captured Keith’s ears, eyes, mind and heart. Not really, since Keith didn’t _know_ Lance. But he knew of Lance. And he knew as much as he could without disrespecting Lance’s actual privacy. But he knew his voice and how he would grin wickedly on stage when singing a song about sex or how his eyes would be the sweetest when he sang a cute song. How he would close his eyes, in a pure act of egoism, without letting anyone in on his pain while he held the microphone tighter than ever and sang a sad song. Keith reminded himself to turn his gaze to Shiro, who was looking great and doing an amazing job too.

They ended their concert with their song _Home_ and Lance took his time on the microphone to flirt with the audience, then proceed to talk about all of the members of the band, leaving Shiro for last.

“And on the drums, the amazing Shiro!” Lance pointed at him. Hunk started wolf whistling, Matt followed him and clapped as if his life depended on it and Pidge was shouting something while clapping too. “He’s going to be with us for the next few concerts. Thanks y’all for coming tonight, it was a blast! I hope to see you very, very soon!” Lance blew one kiss on to each direction he could before the stage went dark and the band members left it.

As instructed by Shiro, Keith waited for some people to leave before going up to someone from security. “Excuse me.” He touched the guard’s shoulder carefully and got the VIP pass from his pocket. “I’m with Shiro, he asked me to seek help from security to go backstage.” The guard examined him with a serious expression and got the ticked from his hand, humming. He nodded and motioned for Keith to follow him.

They walked past the bit of the crowd that was left, waiting for something to happen. The guard led him through a door and a small corridor that led backstage. He could hear some high pitched screams and some laughter getting higher as he approached a group of people.

“Keith!” He heard Shiro calling for him. “Thanks for guiding him, man!” He offered his hand to the guard, who just nodded and walked away. Shiro looked confused for a second, but shrugged and hugged Keith. “So, how did you like the concert?”

“You’re sweaty and gross.” He said and hugged Shiro back. “It was great.”

“Keefer, hey, dude!” Matt shouted from the middle of a group of people. “Long time no seen!” He turned back to the person he was talking to. “Sorry who is this for again?” The person said something and he signed a baseball and gave it to them. “Cool, I hope it makes him happy. What about you?” He turned to the next person. Keith’s attention went back to Shiro, who was watching the scene while holding him close, one arm wrapped around his shoulder.

“Wanna give me an autograph?” Keith offered, mockingly. “Just so you don’t feel left out.”

“Ha ha, you’re hilarious.” Shiro answered and chuckled. “I’m the drummer, Keith, I’m used to getting little to no attention. And here I’m not even the main drummer, so...” He shrugged. “They don’t know me. I’m not one of the Paladins.”

“You were great. You are great. Paladin or not.” Keith wrapped his arm around Shiro’s waist and rest his head on his brother’s shoulder. “And just you wait. By the last gig they’ll be screaming your name. Drummer or not.” Shiro laughed loudly and Keith’s mouth formed a soft smile. A very petite shy person approached them.

“H-hi...” They didn’t look up properly, cheeks as red as blood. “Do you mind... Autographing my notebook?” They handed the item to Shiro, who let go of Keith to get it and the pen they were handing him. “I-it’s for Joy...”

“That’s a very pretty name, Joy!” Shiro smiled and they looked up, gaping and getting even redder. Keith held back his chuckle by biting the inside of his cheeks. “Here!” Shiro gave them their notebook back and they smiled wide staring at the autograph. Keith didn’t pry on what he had written, but knowing Shiro it was probably something extremely chivalrous and sappy. “Did you have a good time tonight?”

“Oh! Yes! It was my second Paladins’ concert and it was even better than the first time around! You were very good out there!” They finally met Shiro’s eyes and blinked a few times; Keith realised they were shaking slightly. He could empathise, he was feeling like that too, but he was very good at not letting it show. “No matter what the fandom says: you were good. Please remember that!” They said, sounding somewhat determined and Shiro smiled gently, nodding.

“Thank you, Joy! I hope to see you in some other gig. And I’m glad you had a good time.” Shiro smiled wider and Joy’s jaw dropped, so they looked back down before they excused themselves and moved so they were near Matt.

Shiro brought Keith closer again and they were silent for a while. A security guard entered the room and started rushing everyone out. Hunk insisted on finishing talking to each person who wanted to talk to him and Pidge insisted on taking weird funny selfies with everyone who wanted to. That was their way of letting the guard know they weren’t interested in letting any fan down because of time or whatever. Shiro told the security that Keith was with him and the guard eyes Keith from head to toe before nodding and leaving him alone; which was uncomfortable, to say the least.

“Aren’t you asking for an autograph?” Shiro whispered to Keith and got elbowed in return. “What?” He chuckled.

“Shut up.” Keith crossed his arms and rolled his eyes.

“Finally I can talk to you!” Matt smiled and ran towards Keith, arms open wide for a hug. Keith sighed, but let him draw him into the embrace. He liked Matt. He knew Shiro liked Matt. _Really_ liked Matt. He’d heard so much about Matt that he didn’t see him as an unattainable figure. He was just his big brother’s best friend. “I’ve been wanting to meet you in person forever, Keith! Shiro doesn’t shut up about you and facetiming isn't enough! If I didn’t know any better I would think he was your father, not your big bro!”

“It’s an honest mistake. Even I make it sometimes.” Keith said and Matt laughed loudly. “Hey, everyone! This is Keith. Shiro’s brother.” Matt called everyone’s attention and let go of Keith. Keith examined the room. Pidge and Hunk were approaching him, but Lance was nowhere to be seen.

“Hey, Keith. I’m Pidge. They, them.” Pidge adjusted their glasses and smiled. “Pronouns?”

“He, him.” Keith smiled back and Pidge nodded. “Nice to meet you.”

“I’m Hunk! He, him.” Hunk offered him his hand and Keith took it, shaking it slightly. Hunk smiled. “Firm grip you’ve got. Do you play any instruments?”

“I play the piano.” Keith answered and Hunk hummed. “I used to anyway.”

“Used to?” Pidge asked; their voice came from somewhere slightly higher than before. Keith noticed they were climbing Hunk’s back. Hunk let go of Keith’s hand to help Pidge up and hold their legs so they didn’t fall.

“It’s... a long story?” Keith offered. That was the best way he knew how dismiss the subject, but Pidge nodded and smiled at him, so he knew it was okay to drop it. “Great concert tonight.”

“Do you want an autograph?” Matt asked, grinning. Keith stared at him blankly and then at Shiro. “Shiro mentioned you’ve been listening to our stuff since that festival.” Keith was going to murder Shiro. Gruesomely. On his sleep.

“Oh, yeah... I have. Kind of. There were some pretty good bands there that night. It’s a shame you were the only ones to get to the spotlight...” Keith tried to sound casual, as if he wasn’t obsessed with The Paladins. Hunk nodded.

“Yes!” Pidge’s voice was bit high pitched. “I’ve been _saying_ that for ages! I’m glad someone agrees!”

“Everyone agrees, Pigeon.” Matt laughed. Pidge just shrugged and yawned. “Don’t you _dare_! We were supposed to go out and celebrate our return!”

“Yeah, yeah. Lance’s probably already gone with some girl and I’m tired, so.” Pidge pulled at Hunk’s hair lightly, who got the message and smiled at Matt apologetically. “Nice meeting you, Keith.” Keith nodded.

“Yeah... I’m not in the mood either, Matt... Sorry.” Hunk shrugged and looked at Keith. “You’re cool. I hope Shiro brings you to a rehearsal someday now that it doesn’t have to be a secret anymore.” Hunk smiled at him and he smiled lightly back. They both left the room despite Matt’s annoyed high pitches protests.

“You Judas! The betrayal!” Matt threw one of his shoes on Hunk’s back and barely missed, hitting the doorframe instead. “You’ll _pay_. I’m going to make you two pay!”

“Are they always like this?” Keith asked Shiro and he laughed, nodding. Keith hummed.

“I'm going to go get ready so we can leave too." Shiro said and Keith nodded.

“Et tu, Brutus?” Matt said, taking a hand to his gut, dramatically. Shiro shrugged and smiled at him. “Great. Leaves me more time to get to know Keith!” Matt held Keith’s arm, who just let him do it, kind of awkwardly.

“Will you be okay?” Shiro took a step back and looked at Keith in the eyes. Keith nodded. Shiro stayed there for a while until Keith nodded again. “I’ll be quick.”

“So, Keith. Want a tour backstage?” Matt smiled wickedly and grabbed Keith by the hand before he could reply. Keith heard Shiro sighing audibly before leaving the room.

Matt took him to where some of the instruments still were at and started telling Keith about which one was used in each song. Keith knew. But he was relieved Matt didn’t know his obsession with the band went that far. Keith took in every bit of information and thanked Heavens for Matt being such a physical person because he kept insisting that Keith touched the instruments and that was fan-heaven. Keith was the luckiest man alive on Earth, he had no doubts. Matt gave him one of his picks - which Keith would eternally treasure - and put his arm around Keith while guiding him back to where they were before.

Matt was rambling about their creative process to some of the songs and how Shiro actually had helped them out a little with the drums for a new song they were writing, since Hunk had been doing all the bass lines in concert, rehearsals and during their current creation process. It had been his own choice, since he thought it would help him officially master the bass and connect with the instrument better.

Keith was interested, he truly was. He was deeply interested, but the sight of Lance McClain, legs spread, sitting on a sofa, hair all messy, and a hickey on his neck that hadn’t been there before, checking his phone, made Keith get slightly distracted. Lance looked up when Matt said his name and that took Keith from his trance and led him to his serious facade; that was his way of hiding his current state of near-hyperventilation.

“We thought you were gone with someone.” Matt said; his arm still wrapped around Keith’s shoulder. Lance’s eyes wandered to that specific spot, then up and down Keith’s body and at last to his face. His eyes were very blue and obviously Keith knew that, but, oh, boy, his eyes were _so_ blue.

“Nah. I got bored before things got interested.” Lance shrugged and looked back to his phone.

“I’m going to change and get my things ready. Can you watch Keith for me?” Matt squeezed Keith’s shoulder before letting go. “Thanks, buddy.” He said before Lance could answer, but Lance sighed and nodded. “Make yourself comfortable, Keith. Shiro and I will be back in no time.” Those words made Lance look up. Keith nodded and watched Matt leave, trying not to mind Lance’s eyes on him. It took them a while to talk.

“You can sit, you know?” Lance said and Keith looked at him. “There’s plenty of room in the sofa.” Keith nodded and did that. He hoped his face was straight because he most definitely wasn’t. Lance locked his phone and stared at Keith for a while. “I’m Lance.” He offered his hand.

“Keith.” He took Lance’s hand and gave him his usual firm handshake. Keith wasn’t going to sleep that night. “Great concert tonight.”

“Thanks!” Lance smiled at him widely. “So... You’re with Matt?” Lance raise an eyebrow and Keith frowned slightly.

“With Shiro, actually.” He answered and Lance seemed surprise.

“Oh, you go Shiro!” Lance chuckled and Keith shook his head.

“I’m his brother.” Keith clarified and Lance laughed again.

“Oh! My bad.” Lance intertwined their finger and Keith was slightly startled for noticing they hadn’t let go. “So you’re not with anyone...” Keith shook his head and Lance hummed. “You like our music?”

“You’re pretty good. And I might be biased, but Shiro was a good addition to the band.” Keith answered and let go of Lances hand, crossing his arms in front of his chest and one leg above his other. Lance hummed.

“I think so too. We worked out pretty well. He _feels_ it, you know? Like, the vibes and the songs, it’s almost as if they were a part of him already. He feels it. And it’s almost like the drums and him are connected somehow, it’s pretty insane.” Lance stated and hesitated for a bit. “Don’t get me wrong, Hunk is my bro and I love him to death, but Shiro... He’s something else. And Hunk’s been doing great on the bass. He was actually originally out bassist, you know? Back in the day, when the band first formed. It was Hunk, Pidge, Matt and me. No assholes allowed.” He spat that last bit and shook his head. “But then Allura was, like, you need a better drummer! Pidge was our drummer back then. And they’re okay, but it’s not their _thing_ , you know? So Allura said ‘you need a better drummer’ and Hunk played the drums, but we’d be without a bassist so she introduced us to this guy she knew, Lotor, who was a good bassist and a bad person - still is, by the way - and we were, like, okay, I guess...” Lance shrugged. “But, yeah, Hunk’s back to his original position this way, so he has no excuse not to practice the bass anymore, and I think I like it better. Besides, Shiro’s a cool guy. So, yeah, we’re definitely better than before.” Keith was dying inside, but was absolutely stoic on the outside; staring at Lance as if not a single one of those information meant as much to him as they did. But his absolute idol, his celebrity crush was right next to him, rambling about his favourite band and how he thought his _brother_ was a great addition to it. Keith was the luckiest man in the entire solar system. “What do you think?” Keith frowned at the question. “You said we’re good, right? So, you listen to us? Sorry if I’m assuming.”

“No. I do. A bit.” Keith lied through his teeth. “Like I said, I think Shiro’s drums worked out smoothly with the songs.”

“So you think we should keep him?” Lance asked and Keith stopped his own jaw from dropping. Was Lance McClain really asking _him_ that? “I mean, you’re probably going to say yes since you’re his brother, but... Try to think as if you were a fan. Would you keep him?” For a second Keith wondered if he had convinced Lance that he was honestly chill about the band; if so, he should’ve gone into drama school because he was _good_. Keith hummed.

“I guess... Fanbases always find ways to complain. So I suppose the public opinion will be divided between supporting Shiro and wanting the original formation back. But...” Keith hesitated. As a fan, he understood wanting Lotor back. It was the original formation, it was what had always been. But as a sensible human being he knew that for Lotor to be kicked out of the band with zero to no explanation about what had happened, it meant it was something probably bad. “Honestly? I had only ever watched you live once before, at a festival years ago, with Lotor as the bassist.” Lance’s face contorted in disgust when Keith said Lotor’s name. “And I don’t know if it’s the years of maturing, but tonight was inexplicably better. Shiro has something to his drumming that cannot be explained. And that seems to be a characteristic of every member of the band? Which I hadn’t felt with Hunk and the drums before, but now that he’s playing the bass... It fit.” Lance was frantically nodding.

“Oh, yeah! Yeah, yeah, yeah! I totally agree! And, to be honest, Hunk does like the bass better even if he won't admit it openly.” Lance unlocked his phone and handed it to Keith. “You’re cool. Wanna give me your phone number?” Keith raised an eyebrow. Holy shit. Holy fucking shit. “To chat. It’s okay if you don’t. We did just meet.” Keith shrugged and dialled his number in Lance’s phone before handing it back to him. He saw Lance naming the contact as ‘Keith (Shiro’s hot bro)’ and it took all of him not to freak out. So he pretended he hadn’t seen that. “Cool! You should come watch us rehearse one of these days, that would be cool.”

“I work a lot.” Keith managed to say without sounding too off and Lance’s smile vanished for a second. Oh, no. Had he just turned Lance down? He hadn’t meant to. He just... Didn’t know what to do. “But we’ll see.”

“Yeah... We’ll see...” Lance smiled again, putting his phone on his pocket and stretching. Shiro entered the room, his bag on his back, a bit breathless and his hair messier than before. Keith shook his head and sighed. “Hey, Shiro, bro. Looking wrecked.”

“Thanks, Lance.” Shiro rolled his eyes, blushing a bit. “Sorry it took me so long.”

“No, I get it. You were busy.” Keith said and grinned, making Shiro blush even more. “Nice talking to you, Lance.” Keith tried to secretly savour Lance’s name as he said it to him. That was probably his only chance of doing so and he would. Because he was gay and helpless and stupid. Lance grinned at him, watching him stand up and walk towards Shiro.

“Right back at ya, Keith.” Lance’s eyes locked on Keith’s ass. “Hope to do that again soon.” He looked up into Keith’s eyes and winked. Oh... Awkward Keith nodded and smiled back, not sure whether he was grinning or smiling like an idiot, before turning his back to Lance and walking out of the room following Shiro’s lead. Shiro shouted ‘goodbye, Lance’ as Lance laughed and said something about a ‘walk of shame’.

Lance had straight up flirted with Keith. And Keith was the luckiest man on the entire universe. He knew that. He was sure of that. Even if Lance never texted or called him, it would’ve been fine because he had asked for Keith’s number and stared at his ass and winked at him. And Keith was a goner. Shiro was quiet on their way home, knowing damn well he had no right to tease Keith about anything at that moment.

Keith’s luck had gone even further when the band members followed him on his Instagram and Twitter and sent him friend requests on Facebook - except for Lance, but he honestly didn’t mind that because Lance had gotten his phone number. He thanked the universe for leaving his stanning to Tumblr. He also thanked the universe for being a realistic person, so he didn’t get upset when Lance never got a hold of him again. It was fine.

A week later, while eating his oatmeal and drinking his green tea he was speechless. He had thought he was the luckiest man in all of the universe, but maybe he was the luckiest man in all of the universes; in every single possible reality. Because that exact day was the day he had woken up to find an enormous text from Lance McClain on his phone - apparently he couldn’t be succinct in texts either. And it read:

 **heey! Lance here. from The Paladins? got your number last week after the concert? hope u remember me lmao**  
**anyway, we’re gonna hit the road in a couple of days and a lil bird (might’ve been some pigeon) told me u happen to be interested in dudes and hey I’m a dude and you’re a dude who’s interested in dudes and I’m a dude who happens to be interested in u**  
**so in case you’re interested in this specific dude maybe we could hang out? u know... so, if u r let me know and we’ll figure something out and if you’re not it’s all fine, no pressure and please don’t block me? u r cool.**  
**Lance x**

To which he had answered with ‘I’m free tonight’. Keith was the luckiest man alive and he had no idea what to do.


	2. I'm not usually like this, but I like what you're doing to me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dinner, ice cream and sharing a ride. Keith doesn't know what to expect. Lance seems hyped and clingy, Keith is confused, but enjoying it all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! here i am with another chapter! i actually got comments last week and they made me extremely happy ?? çldfsçado i'm a nerd, sorry, i'm not used to people reading my stuff ljdsfadsçl  
> THIS IS IMPORTANT: this chapter has some very canon divergent stuff (aka my half-brazilian!lance headcanon lsdkofjçoafsj), so there's that,,,,,  
> anyway! this chapter includes some talking about rogue one, anime and music, so have in mind maybe that part might be a tad confusing, but it's nothing major it's just keith and lance bonding *eyes emoji* (and it doesn't include ANY spoilers)  
> also: as always, if there are any grammar or w/e mistakes hmu pls !!! tks <3
> 
> anyway, let's go ~

He looked at himself on the mirror, taking in the sight from head to toe. He had gone for his black leather pants, the tightest pair of trousers he owned - if that was some sort of date he was most definitely going to use his body to his favour -, a dark red button up sleeveless shirt, a black pair of boots that had a bit of heels, a slightly oversized dark grey denim jacket, slightly ripped, one bigger rip on the left shoulder that showed a bit of skin and his fingerless motorcycle gloves. He even went as far as putting some makeup on; nothing too apparent, he had fixed his eyebrows a bit, given his lips some colour and added some mascara to his lashes. After thorough examination Keith concluded: he looked hot. Mission accomplished.

He told Shiro he was going out, but didn’t elaborate, having no idea whether it was wise to let Shiro know he had a date - was it a date, though? Lance had used the words “hang out” - with his band mate. Even though Keith didn’t know whether they were still band mates. Was Shiro going to go on tour with The Paladins? Was his experience in the band over already?

Keith tried scaring those thoughts away, he _really_ didn’t need to think about that at that specific moment of that specific night. So he didn’t tell Shiro who he was going out with or where he was going to go to. Shiro didn’t pry, which Keith was thankful for, but insisted that Keith took his credit card and let him know when he got wherever he was going and when he was coming back or whatever, really. Keith agreed. Shiro knew better than trying to get Keith to talk and Keith knew better than denying Shiro his chance to take care of him.

Keith got his wallet, his fully charged phone, his keys and a peppermint flavoured lip balm before heading out. He walked to the nearest bus stop and waited, not wanting to waste unnecessary money on Ubers and taxis. Even though Shiro would insist that it was okay for Keith to do that, that it was more than okay because they weren’t short on money at all and Shiro got more than enough from his drumming too, Keith hated wasting money that wasn’t his. That had been a topic of great discussion between the two of them for years, then an immediate trigger for actual fights, until Shiro realised it was useless to fight Keith once he believed something with all his strength.

So they usually shared the house’s expenses. Keith had a regular job as a barista, which he didn’t really like because required him to interact too much and drained his energy way more often than not, so he couldn’t necessarily split the bills half-half, but, to be fair, Shiro did spend more time at their flat than he did. Or at least that was Shiro’s argument to convince Keith that it was fine for him to pay less. Keith ended up agreeing to it because otherwise he would’ve picked a fight he would’ve regretted and he knew that.

Keith got to the place they had agreed to meet at ten minutes before the time they’d agreed on and took his time to breathe for an instant and try not losing it. Lance had suggested they met at a place Keith actually knew and enjoyed, which was great. Altea was a geek themed bar/restaurant owned by a really weird guy named Coran and co-owned by the fiercest and get sweetest woman Keith had ever met named Allura, who were friends with The Paladins. The truth was that Allura’s family were the ones who actually owned the place, but since she became involved with managing The Paladins, they had “sold” the place to Coran. Keith knew, through Shiro - who knew through Matt - that it was just symbolic; apparently Coran’s and Allura’s families had been best friends for ages, so when harassment at Altea started becoming a problem - since some Paladins’ fans were too over the top -, Coran had offered to buy the place so things would go back to normal.

The normal was usually full, but not overcrowded. Keith liked Altea; he used to go there with Shiro, so he had fond memories of the place. And it wasn’t too fancy or too expensive, which was great, since he didn’t want to ask Shiro for money so he could secretly go out with his band mate.

Some high pitched voices took Keith from inside his own thoughts. He stared at the direction the voices came from and saw three people surrounding Lance, who was signing something and smirking at them. Keith sighed; he should have imagined Lance would be approached while they were together. All of a sudden Keith felt absolutely self-conscious; he knew the fanbase well enough to know him being seen in public with Lance could become a problem very quickly. That was the worst part: the ship wars. And since Lotor had left the band they were a thousand times worse. People were quick to forget the members of the band were actual real life humans with lives and problems and personalities and feelings. Lance caught Keith’s gaze and pointed to the restaurant with his head, which Keith understood as a sign for him to go in first. He started walking and received a nod and a smile from Lance, which - he hated to admit - made his legs a bit weak.

He was greeted by a blond haired person on the inside who asked him if he had reservations. Keith gaped for a second, blinking a few times.

“I...” He hesitated. “I’m not sure.” Keith admitted. “It’s a table for two. I’m Keith Kogane.” The receptionist nodded and checked her computer for his name, frowning a bit. Keith took a deep breath. “Can you try Lance McClain?” He tried and the receptionist smiled at him.

“He’s on the list. Do you happen to have another last name?” They asked and Keith frowned for a second before understanding what probably happened.

“Shirogane.” He answered, even though that wasn’t his last name, not willing to share his backstory with them. He really didn’t like sharing personal information with strangers. They nodded. “McClain is right outside, but he asked me to come in first.”

“Yes. Follow me.” They smiled wider and Keith cursed mentally for calling him by his last name. That was probably weird, right? Probably. That entire situation was weird and unnatural, so Keith was definitely a tiny bit uncomfortable. The receptionist took him to a section of the restaurant he had never been to with Shiro.

The tables were isolated from each other there and each separate private cubicle has a different theme. They pulled Keith’s chair so he would sit down and nodded before leaving him to himself. That was weird. And a little sad if he didn’t know Lance was right outside. He examined the decoration, it was Star Wars themed; more specifically Rogue One themed, and Keith wondered if Lance had specifically picked that cubicle or if it had been random. He liked it. There were character photos and descriptions on the walls and action figures on shelves. Keith also noticed a speaker on the ceiling and wondered what that was for. A few minutes into his taking in the place he heard Lance’s voice.

“Thanks, Nyma.” Keith didn’t turn around to look, but Lance was in front of him, sitting down, in no time. He looked... ridiculously good. He was wearing a blue turtleneck, black skinny jeans with a belt and some silver chains coming out of it and a grey jacket with synthetic light grey fur at the ends of its hood. “Sorry for making you wait.” Keith shook his head and Lance smiled wide. “I thought it would be better to have some privacy. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Not at all.” Keith said and Lance’s smile widened. “You like Rogue One?”

“What gave it away?” Lance grinned and Keith rolled his eyes instinctively, almost regretting it as soon as he did it. Key word: almost. Because Lance laughed loudly as soon as Keith rolled his eyes and he decided to take that as a good sign. “It’s a great movie. And it has Diego Luna in it, so... You know... Great package deal.” Lance was still laughing a bit at the end of his sentences. “I actually think it’s amazing to have Diego Luna playing such an important character in such an important major nerd franchise, you know? With him being Mexican and all. As a half Cuban guy it’s actually really cool to hear someone with an accent very close to my mother’s accent on screen.” Keith hummed and nodded. “But before you think wrongly of me I do like the movie for the right reasons too. The story is great and the characters are interesting and Star Wars is one of my favourite franchises, so there’s also all that.”

“I don’t think there’s such thing as liking a movie for the right or wrong reasons. Unless it’s a really bad and unethical reason or something like that.” Keith said and Lance smiled wider. He couldn’t judge Lance. He still watched Supernatural because the actors were good looking. He wouldn’t tell Lance that, obviously, but _he_ knew it; which meant he knew he was in no position to judge Lance for whatever.

They went quiet for a while, so Keith drove his gaze to the walls, examining them further so it wouldn’t be that awkward. Lance waited for a bit and then grabbed the menu looking at it for a brief second before closing it and putting it on the table. Keith looked at him.

“Wanna order something? I’m kind of hungry to be honest.” Lance said and Keith nodded, checking the menu himself. “Maybe we could order some fries or onion rings for now and then whatever later?” Keith looked up and stared at Lance for a second, his brain fired up. If Lance had suggested onion rings he either didn’t mind the fallout of eating onions and kissing or he didn’t intend on kissing Keith. “I personally think I’m in the mood for fries better. Do you like cheddar? I’m not big on bacon, but we can ask them aside. And if you don’t like cheddar we can get a different cheese or get it separate too.” Keith felt his lips twirl into a small smile and Lance finally stopped talking.

“Fries are great. Cheddar cheese and no bacon.” Keith looked back to the menu and Lance pressed a button on the side of the table and waited. Keith wondered if he should ask for a burger or an actual dish later on. Depending on how many fries they ate maybe he wouldn’t even want anything else. He decided to first focus on deciding what he was going to drink before a waiter got to them. Keith had very little time to do so. “Rolo, my man!” Lance greeted and stood up to hug the waiter. “Rolo, this is Keith. Keith, Rolo.” Rolo offered his hand to Keith, who shook it.

“Firm grip. Do you happen to play the drums?” Rolo asked and Lance chuckled. Keith shook his head. “That’s a shame. Lancey boy here is looking for a drummer.”

“Was looking for a drummer.” Lance sat back down and shrugged. “But I can’t tell you about it. If Allura finds out I did she kills me and they’ll be out looking for a new vocalist.” Rolo laughed.

“I might let Allura know my voice is freaking angelic pretty soon then.” Lance rolled his eyes at Rolo’s response, still smiling. “So, what’s gonna be, bro?”

“Fries, just cheddar, for both of us. And I want a Heineken. Keith?” Rolo marked Lance’s order down and looked at Keith, who blinked twice before quickly making up his mind.

“Tonic. No ice nor lemon, just the tonic.” Keith replied and Lance hummed.

“You want a cup or a straw?” Rolo asked, marking down his order. Keith shrugged and Rolo chuckled. “Okay, I’ll bring you both. You’ll drink from the bottle, right? As always.” Lance nodded, they thanked Rolo and he left the room.

“Rolo and I go way back, you know. Just like Nyma and I. We met under shitty circumstances and they were monumentally screwed, so I introduced them to Allura and, you know Allura, that was enough to make them question their whole lives. So I asked her to get them a job here and all and she talked to Coran, who agreed, and now here they are.” Lance’s smile was fonder while talking about his friends. “They’re great kids. Just needed some guidance, that’s all... And Coran is great for guidance. Have you met Coran? He’s great!” Keith just listened for a while as Lance was going on about how Rolo and Nyma were nice and how he liked the and how Coran was a great guy and, surprisingly, it didn’t bother him. He had no actual interest in any of those subjects, but the way Lance lit up when he was getting excited made Keith’s whole body feel warmer. That was bad. Was he being awful for not mentioning his childish pseudo crush on an imaginary Lance? “I’m... Sorry. I get excited.”

“It’s okay.” Keith said, trying to sound as reassuring as possible.

“Okay, tell me something about you.” Lance asked and Keith shrugged. “No, come one, dude, anything. Favourite colour?”

“Red.” Keith answered and Lance hummed.

“Mine’s blue.” Keith knew that. But Keith shouldn’t know that. In a normal scenario, which was, hopefully, the scenario Lance thought he was at, Keith didn’t know that. “Favourite song at the moment?”

“Probably Roaring 20s by Panic! At The Disco. But I’m not sure. Yours?” Lance hummed.

“I don’t know... I didn’t like Panic’s new album, really...” He hummed again. “I mean, it’s a great album, but not totally my cup of tea. I was listening a lot to a latino singer named Chico Buarque the past few months. He has a song I really like named Roda Viva.” Lance ran his hand through his own hair.

“I’m not familiar with latin songs.” Keith said and Lance’s face lit up for a brief second.

“I can send you a bunch if you want to. All sorts of them, from reggaeton to bossa nova, some hip hop and rock, some pop. Musically I end up being influenced more by my father’s side of the family, so most of the things I listen to are Brazilian, but...” Keith tried to keep a straight face. That was nee information, he had no idea Lance was half Brazilian. He probably failed because Lance started explaining. “My father was actually born in Brazil? Like...” Lance adjusted his posture, sitting with his back straight on the chair, but his legs weirdly crossed. “My mom’s family is Cuban, right? And my father’s is from the United States, but my dad was actually adopted. He was born in Brazil and came from a Brazilian family. I never actually got to know the actual details because my family doesn’t talk about that much, but at some point they moved to the US and something happened and my father became an orphan, so the McClains adopted him.” Lance rubbed his palms on his pants. “Fast forward to my father visiting Cuba years later for also weird unknown reasons that my family never discussed with me and he meets my mom. They fall in love, have my oldest brother, Marco, my father stays in Cuba for a few years, then they have Luis after three years, a year later they all move to the US because my grandpa gets ill. I was born that first year, then, five years later Veronica gets in the picture.” Keith only stares at Lance, wondering how it was so easy for him to share such personal information with someone he barely knew. “So, yeah, half Cuban, half Brazilian, but also technically American.”

“Do you speak Spanish?” Keith asks, trying to sound interesting and unknowing; even though he knew that answer. Lance nodded.

“Oh yeah. And Brazilian Portuguese too. I was brought up learning and constantly hearing a lot both English and Spanish, then when I was about five my father asked me if I wanted to learn Portuguese too and I said yes, so now I’m fluent in three languages, which is pretty neat.” Lance grinned and Keith hummed. “What about you? Do you speak other languages?”

“I speak some Japanese because Shiro taught me some. And I know some Korean words. I learnt French at some point when I was younger just because I needed to do something to get out of routine’s boredom, but I’m not sure I remember much of it.” Keith answered and was actually happy for Rolo to get there with their drinks and fries before Lance could ask him about family matters.

The food arriving changed the mood a lot. Keith was actually kind of hungry, so he ate a few fries very silently before realising that was probably bad date etiquette - to completely neglect the date over fries. Lance was actually pretty focused on eating too, which comforted Keith, at least they were both on the same page about something. Because Keith still wasn’t sure whether that was a date or not.

“Do you like anime? If so, what’s your favourite one from the classics?” Lance asked very seriously and made Keith chuckled. “And there _is_ a wrong answer.”

“I’m torned between Pokémon and Inuyasha, but probably Inuyasha.” Keith hummed and ate another fry. Lance nodded. “What’s the wrong answer?”

“Dragon Ball. Listen, I recognise its importance, but... Ugh, I don’t know, man. I don’t know.” Lance ate another fry. “Now, the _right_ answer would’ve been Sailor Moon, but yours wasn’t bad, so you passed the test.” Keith chuckled. “Do you know Mushishi? You look like someone who would dig it.”

“Of course I do, it’s great. Not one of my favourites, though. Even though it is really good. I think my favourite at the moment is Zankyou no Terror, have you seen it?” Keith asked and Lance frowned for a second.

“It’s very serious. Matt likes it a lot and he tried convincing me to watch it, but I don’t know if it’s my cup of tea.” Lance shrugged. “I’m watching Boku no Hero Academia now, which is... What everyone is watching lately, right?”

“Let me guess, your favourite character is either Ochako or Deku?” Keith smiled and Lance chuckled.

“I don’t have a favourite, but maybe. Or Kirishima, he’s great too. Yours is definitely Todoroki, no doubt.” Lance guessed and Keith nodded. “So easy to read, mullet.” Keith rolled his eyes and Lance chuckled. “Opinions on Bakugo.”

“A dick. But I like him. He needs someone to tell him no a couple of times. Needs to lose some fights so he’s put into his place, you know? But he’s great, I do like him. You?” Keith took a sip from his tonic while Lance hesitated.

“I think he’s immature. But he changes, right? And I only started liking him after the sports festival. Because of the Ochako thing.” Lance shrugged. “It felt like he respected her, so it was nice. But, yeah, I agree with you. What about Mineta?”

“Absolute trash and shouldn’t exist.” Keith shrugged.

“Agreed.” Lance nodded and they both chuckled. “What else? I’m a big fan of Ouran, have you watched it?”

“Ouran should be immortalised as an universal icon.” Keith answered and Lance smiled wider. “The plot, the characters, the development. And the manga is even better. But I love Ouran, I’ve also watched every live action. It’s just too good.”

“I’ve always wanted to read the manga, but I hate reading online and I never found the whole thing to buy.” Lance pouted for a second.

“I can lend you mine if you swear upon the safety of what you love the most that you’ll take good care of them.” Keith offered. Shiro would’ve had a heart attack over that. If he knew. Because Keith was weirdly possessive of his belongings, he only let people he trusted a lot touch his stuff. But Lance was Lance; his celebrity crush. And Keith was pretty sure he wouldn’t even remember that when the night was over, so it didn’t matter at all.

They kept talking about anime for a while, even after the fries were over. Then the subject moved for TV shows and movies and so on, not losing rhythm even when they stopped to order their food - Keith got himself a burger with double the meat and three breads and loads of cheese, while Lance ordered a chicken parmigiana with rice and a lettuce and tomato salad. Keith would ask questions and Lance would talk nonstop, really passionately, for a while before realising it and trying to ask something back, only to have Keith purposefully throw a question back at him to keep him talking.

Keith was a pretty closed person, that was just how things had always been for him. So he liked how Lance would lose himself in whatever they were talking about and fill the room with stories about him, with theories; Keith really liked that. He wasn’t opposed to silence, in general, but he was scared that silence would make everything extremely awkward in that situation, so he kept instigating Lance into talking and Lance bit his every bait, seemingly gladly. So they spent their night like that. After they were both done with their meals they kept on talking for a long time. It was good, Keith thought. Weirdly comfortable, even. They only stopped talking for a while when Rolo entered the cubicle with their bill, letting them know Altea was about to close.

“So how is it going to be?” Rolo asked, referring to bill. Lance motioned for Rolo to hand the bill over to him, but Keith intercepted it midway.

“Hey!” Lance protested. “I invited you, I’m paying.” Keith rolled his eyes and checked how much it would cost him. It wasn’t a lot, but it was definitely a bit more than he would ever spend on a normal night out. But it was worth it.

“You take credit?” He asked Rolo, who nodded and showed him the machine. Keith got his credit card - his, not Shiro’s - from his wallet.

“You’re not paying, mullet.” Lance slapped Rolo’s hand away from Keith. Keith narrowed his eyes at the nickname. “Rolo, don’t let him pay.”

“Don’t drag me into this, I’m just the waiter, man.” Rolo laughed.

“He’s not paying.” Lance faced Keith. “You’re not paying.”

“Wrong.” Keith limited his words and Rolo chuckled. Lance held Rolo’s wrist so Keith wouldn’t have access to the machine. Keith sighed. “Let’s compromise, I pay mine and you pay yours.” Lance narrowed his eyes. “If I’m not paying everything I’m at least paying my share. No arguing about that.”

“Fine...” Lance hissed, letting Rolo go. “You’re getting it your way this time, mullet, but next time I’m paying. And I’m taking care of tipping Rolo.” Keith shrugged and informed Rolo how much he would pay, then Lance payed his share and gave Rolo a fifty bill. That was absolutely surreal for Keith; not because Rolo didn’t deserve it, but Keith had been a waiter once and he had never gotten that much from one single individual. Rolo thanked them and left, reminding them they were closing.

They both stood up and Lance stretched and sighed, smiling. They walked out of Altea, saying goodbye to the staff on their way to the door. As soon as they were out on the open, Lance wrapped his arm around Keith’s shoulder and drew him closer. Keith felt his own heart beat faster, suddenly remembering who he was out with.

“Where to now?” Lance asked, looking at Keith. Keith tried analysing whether that was a bro lowkey hug or not. “I know this really nice ice cream place about fifteen minutes waking from here that stays open the whole night.”

“I should probably head home before there are no buses.” Keith admitted, refraining from shrugging and accidentally making Lance take his arm off him.

“Don’t worry about that, we can share a cab or something later. I’ll pay.” Lance smiled at him and Keith felt himself frown. “Hey, come on. Am I that annoying to be around that you want to ditch now?” He joked.

“You read right through me.” Keith deadpanned. Lance pulled him closer chuckling and rolling his eyes. “I’m paying for the ice cream.”

“No.” Lance was still smiling and Keith stopped looking at him before he did something stupid like kiss Lance. “Let me spoil you, mullet.”

“You’ll pay for the cab, I’ll pay for the ice cream.” Keith said as if it was the most logical thing. Lance sighed and they started walking.

“Can I ask you a really personal question?” Lance said after a while and Keith sighed. “You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, but I’ve been wondering, but I don’t know if it’s, like, a forbidden and very sensitive topic or not, so I never asked...”

“Shoot.” Keith said, slightly scared. But he could just tell Lance he didn’t want to talk about it if he didn’t. He didn’t know Lance too well, but he felt like Lance would get it , like he wouldn’t pressure Keith into talking.

“What happened to Shiro?” Lance asked, his voice a bit lower. Keith assumed he was trying to be careful and took a deep breath. He could answer that vaguely, it was fine. He kind of hoped Lance had asked Shiro about it, not him. Shiro had no problem discussing that, but Keith... Keith didn’t like it.

“Car accident.” He answered. “He’s fine talking about it though. It’s not a sensitive topic for him.”

“Oh... ‘Cause I remember him from when we met... And Matt never mentioned anything, so when he showed up to rehearsals I was...” Lance hesitated. “It’s just not what I remembered.”

“Yeah... That happens a lot.” Keith felt himself shrink into Lance’s grip. “At first it was hard for him. Because of the drumming.” Lance started caressing Keith’s arm. “But he practiced a lot and he’s got great control of his prosthetic now, which you probably noticed. So it’s fine now.” Keith shrugged and Lance just held him stronger.

“Sorry to bring that up.” Keith shrugged again and regretted when Lance let him go. His hear almost stopped when Lance’s fingers intertwined with his. “Tell me what’s your favourite ice cream, mullet.” Keith looked at Lance, who was smiling at him and smiled lightly.

As if Lance had never brought the accident up, their conversation resumed to chatting about a bunch of things after the other. At the ice cream shop Keith got himself a cone with three balls, dark chocolate, lemon pie and vanilla. Lance got himself a medium bowl and mixed a lot of flavours, plus gummy bears as toppings and melted chocolate on top of it all. Keith was disgusted and Lance informed him that it was Brazilian culture, shrugging. Keith paid and they sat on a table outside of the shop, continuing their conversation.

Lance grabbed a paper towel and cleaned Keith’s cheek as if it was nothing and continued talking excitedly about how orange juice with sugar was unacceptable, but sugarless lemonade was heretic. Keith had learnt a lot about Lance’s tasted that night. He learnt that Lance mainly took his coffee black, but if he added milk to it he also added a fuckton of sugar. That Lance loved horror movies, but couldn’t bring himself to sleep alone after watching one because he legit believed in spirits and demons and was terrified of them. That Lance’s relationship with Allura had been complicated because he had had a huge crush on her on their early years, but once he had gotten past that they’d become really good friends and absolutely inseparable. That he had three nephews that were, according to Lance, the cutest kids ever, but also the worst kids ever to roam the earth. That Lance had come out as bisexual to his family at the age of fourteen and his older brother had playfully slapped him for having stolen his shot as the first person of the family to come out – not long after that Marco introduced his boyfriend, Jean, to their family. That Lance loved stuffed animals as much as he did. He also learnt that Lance was extremely physical, constantly touching Keith’s arm and hand while they were talking, which made Keith freak out on the inside.

Inside the Uber Lance had called them, Lance pulled Keith so close to him that Keith was weirdly resting his head on Lance’s shoulder. Somehow, even though Keith was taller than Lance, it worked. And Keith wouldn’t dare getting away from the warmth coming from Lance; he wasn’t that stupid. Or that smart. They were quiet and Lance was running his fingers through Keith’s hair; Keith closed his eyes and tried steading his heartbeat, scared that Lance could either feel it or even hear it. Lance hugged Keith and rested his head on top of Keith’s. They stayed like that until they got to Keith’s building.

“Can you wait just a minute? I just wanna drop him off properly, you know?” Lance asked the driver, who nodded, smiled and gave him a thumbs up. Lance and Keith both got out of the car and Lance tried catching Keith’s hand. Keith panicked for a second, scared that Shiro could see them somehow. Lance frowned looking at Keith.

“Shiro.” He said as if that explained everything. And maybe, judging by Lance’s weird expression, it really did. They walked near the building’s entrance and Keith stopped, looking at Lance.

“I don’t think I told you how good you look tonight.” Lance said and took a step forward. “You look incredible.”

“Thanks. You too.” Keith swallowed a bit harder than the usual. Lance touched his face lightly and brushed his fingers on a strand of hair, putting it behind Keith’s ear. “Let me know when you’re home?” Lance nodded and smiled. He pulled Keith into a hug and it took Keith a second, but he hugged back.

“Night, mullet.” Keith could hear the mockery on Lance’s voice and huffed, punching his back lightly. “Ouch, what a dick.” Lance laughed and Keith chuckled with him. Lance was the first one to let go; he punched Keith’s left arm playfully. “See ya ‘round.”

“Yeah.” Lance winked and Keith rolled his eyes, turning his back to Lance and marching into his own building. He heard the faint sound of the Uber’s door closing and the car going away.

Keith entered the apartment, it was around one in the morning, the lights were mostly off, apart from a lamp in the living room, so he walked to his room and turned the light on before going back and hitting the lamp. He took off his clothes, put his pyjamas on, washed his face and brushed his teeth before walking carefully into Shiro’s room to let him know he had arrived safely.

“Hey.” He touched Shiro’s shoulder carefully and waited until Shiro looked at him. “Just letting you know I’m home.”

“Alone?” Shiro asked and yawned. Keith nodded and hummed. “How was it?”

“It was...” Keith smiled. “Actually really nice?”

“You’re asking me?” Shiro chuckled and Keith did so too. “Wanna talk about it?”

“Not really.” Keith frowned. He did, but he couldn’t tell Shiro. It would be... Awkward to say the least.

“So it wasn’t good?” Shiro tried again and Keith sighed. “Okay, I’ll drop it. If you ever do want to talk, though...”

“I know. Thanks, Shiro.” Keith stood up and walked to the door. “I just don’t think it’s going to grow from here... So...” Shiro hummed. “Night.”

“Good night, Keith.” Shiro answered and yawned again. Keith left the room and entered his, laying down on his bed and checking his phone.

**Lance McClain: I’m home. tks for tonight. I had lots of fun.  
Lance McClain: hope u did too.  
Keith: I did.  
Keith: Thanks.  
** **Keith: Glad you’re home safe.  
** **Lance McClain: aw, were u worried? ;)  
** **Keith: No.  
** **Lance McClain: ouch. rude, mullet.  
** **Keith: Stop calling me that. Never seen a man with long hair before?  
** **Lance McClain: yeah I have. but ur the first one with a mullet ;))  
** **Keith: Good night, McClain.  
** **Lance: night, mullet ;***  

Keith huffed and locked his phone screen, putting it to the side. He closed his eyes and tried falling asleep as soon as possible, but it took him a while because he couldn’t get the ghost feeling of Lance’s touch out of his thoughts. He was either being blessed or cursed and, honestly, he didn’t know which one was worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you liked the chapter!!! here's a link to [p!atd's roaring 20s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HWSqv-xsc5o) and one to [chico buarque's roda-viva](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IpAR9DlQV6o). i also made a [playlist for the fic !!!!](https://open.spotify.com/user/playlandi/playlist/2vr6vymACCES9lHyLx2Qf4?si=zvZgfaKMTKCfl7T--qcQCg) it includes the songs mentioned in the fic and some other songs that might appear or that inspired my writing ldfsjafçdjds i know it's kinda early in the fic for all of the songs to make sense, but.... (and i might add some as i post the next chapters hMMM)
> 
> if you wanna come talk to me on tumblr dot com [this is my les mis blog](http://whensunscollide.tumblr.com) and  
> [this is my "main" blog](http://marsisnotcreative.tumblr.com)
> 
> see y'all next week <3


	3. You are the only one that needs to know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith keeps a secret from Shiro.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, i've been trying to post this chapter since last friday night (my posting time/day), but ao3 is going crazy and not letting me post the whole chapter. i hope this time it works out, but if it does't, the body of this chapter will contain a link to the chapter posted on my blog! sorry for the inconvenience.

Never in his life Keith had been so happy to go to work like he had that day. Going to work meant being busy enough not to think and being busy enough not to think meant not thinking about Lance. So Keith was excited. Because he was no longer sixteen and it wasn’t acceptable for him to day dream about his celebrity crush at all times. Work would bless him like nothing ever did before. Or so he thought.

It all began with Lance sending him a picture of his travel bag being packed. Keith answered asking when they were leaving and Lance answered that only after dark and that had gotten Lance to talk. He sent photos of every step of his way through packing, using Keith’s chat as a list to make sure he wasn’t forgetting anything. Keith commented on some pictures and ignored others. Lance sent a photo of a pack of condoms and a winking emoji and Keith ignored it completely, so Lance brought it back later asking Keith whether he was proud Lance was being careful; to which Keith responded that he wasn’t Lance’s parental figure nor doctor nor sex education teacher.

Keith tried really hard avoiding his phone, though. Because he was working and he had never gotten a single warning for staying on his phone instead of working and he didn’t plan on changing that. His supervisor, Kolivan, a really tall, really strong and weirdly serious man was constantly watching him; not because he didn’t trust Keith, but because he saw too much potential in Keith, apparently. They had had a rough start, with Kolivan not being very fond of Keith, but Keith grew on him and vice-versa, so they became somewhat buddies. In Kolivan’s own odd way.

Lunch break came soon and Keith sighed checking his phone and seeing that he had thirty eight unread messages. Thirty of them belonged to Lance, two to Shiro - their groceries list and a text telling Keith they needed to talk when he got home - and six from Pidge. Keith wondered for a second how Pidge got his phone number, but let the thought go when he read the texts and realised that two of them were links to articles about Mothman.

 **Pidge Holt: shiro told matt who told me that u dig mothman and cryptids so here’s a lil thing for u  
** **Pidge Holt: this is pidge btw** **Pidge Holt: anyway here’s my hot take: mothman is real but might also be a shapeshifter  
** **Pidge Holt: or like his wings withdraw u know so he can hide them and look human in daylight. hiding in plain sight u know???** **Keith: I’m at work right now, but I’ll read them later. And I don’t know, I always thought he just lived in the woods. Sounds more plausible for me.** **  
**

He opened Shiro’s texts.

 **Shiro:  
** **Milk  
** **Green tea (leaves)  
** **Bread  
** **Cereal (whichever)  
** **Oat (stop eating all the oat, you’ll have intestinal problems)  
** **Hairspray  
** **Toothpaste  
** **Soap  
** **Shiro: Come into my room when you’re home. I want to talk.** **C:  
** **Keith: Please stop using ominous emojis, we’ve talked about that. Will do. I’ll get them on my way back home. Why is everyone texting me while I’m working?**

He moved to Lance’s window. They were mostly photos of Lance’s stuff, some of them were Lance asking Keith if he was ignoring him or just working and concluding Keith was working. The last ones were Lance telling Keith he was disappointed on him for being “just like pidgeon”, and Keith assumed he meant Pidge.

 **Keith: I’m humbled to be compared to them.  
** **Lance McClain: Mothman is a lie that capitalism uses to fool dumb people  
** **Lance McClain: I thought u were smarter that that I’m disappointed, mullet  
** **Keith: Shut it, McClain. You know nothing.  
** **Lance McClain: ur lucky ur cute because.... yeah..... disappointed....  
** **Keith: ...** ****  
**Lance McClain: u still at work?  
** **Keith: Lunch break. So I’m leaving you hanging for a bit now so I can eat.  
** **Lance McClain: ok, back to the spamming.**

Keith rolled his eyes, but smiled fondly, locking his phone screen and putting it on the table. He opened the tupperware he took with his food, a salad - lettuce, cabbage, chicken, tomato, carrot, cucumber -, some rice and sliced onions, and started eating in silence. Lunch break was Keith’s favourite time of a working day because it meant some alone time and, as an introvert, he needed to recharge or else he would freak out. He spent about eight minutes in absolute silence, hearing his co-workers chatting and laughing and the noises of the café outside the door of the “staff only” room he was at.

“You’re distracted today.” Kolivan’s voice took Keith out of his blissful silence and he sighed. Kolivan sat down in front of Keith, crossing his arms. “What’s troubling you, young man?” Keith shrugged.

“My head’s not in the right place today, I guess.” Keith shrugged again and Kolivan hummed, straight faced. “It’s nothing, really. I just...” Keith took the last bite of his food and started putting his belongings back into his bag. “I went out with this guy yesterday.”

“Yes?” Kolivan didn’t move an inch or changed his tone, but Keith knew that was him trying to encourage Keith to talk. Kolivan was a weird man. “I imagine if it’s troubling you enough to be evident, then you didn’t discuss it with Shirogane. You can discuss it with me. I’ll be impartial.” Keith sighed again and nodded.

“He’s been in kind of in my life for years now. But we only officially met last week. Yesterday we went out and I don’t know... If it was a date or not?” Keith blinked a few times and looked at Kolivan, expecting any reaction and getting none. He should’ve imagined that. “It was just weird. And I can’t exactly tell Shiro because he’s going to freak out, I think? He’s very protective, but also he gets too excited when I tell him about boys and... This guy is a friend of Shiro’s.”

“Oh.” Kolivan’s voice was absolutely unimpressed; Keith wondered how he managed to be that stoic at all times. “And what exactly is the problem?”

“We went out. Dinner, then ice cream. He was super touchey and lovey dovey sometimes and a huge bro other times and nothing else happened. He hugged me a lot and kept me close, but also punched me on the shoulder a few times?” Keith frowned. “And now he’s been texting me the entire morning about useless stuff as if we’d been best friends for years...”

“You did mention you’ve known him for years.” Kolivan pointed out and Keith hummed.

“But  _he_  didn’t. Know me, I mean.” Kolivan raised one eyebrow and Keith considered that a victory. “He’s the lead singer of my favourite band. Shiro’s friends with them. Actually he was playing with them this past week, so they’re not only friends, they’re coworkers.”

“And you’re scared that would shake Shiro’s relationships within his work field.” Kolivan speculated, Keith nodded. “Are you interested in pursuing a romantic course with that man?”

“We went out  _once_.” Keith said as if the answer to that question was obvious. Kolivan only stared at him. “It’s a celebrity crush, not an actual love interest. We don’t know each other that well.”

“Then it is settled.” Kolivan stood up and touched Keith’s shoulder. “Glad to be of help, Kogane.” He left the room and Keith wasn’t even weirded out. He knew Kolivan’s odd manners.

Nothing had been settled. At all.

Keith ran his hands through his face and thought for a while, concluding the best course of action: casual approach. He would answer Lance’s texts and try acting as normal as possible with, around and regarding him. If they happened to go out again, Keith would cross that bridge when he got to it. Or burn it to the ground. He wouldn’t worry too much; maybe all Lance wanted was a friend, maybe Lance was actually very lonely and wanted someone to spend some time with. It was fine. Keith could be those things. And surely as time passed and as he met Lance better his stupid childhood crush would vanish and he would get used to Lance and Lance’s presence. Everything would be fine.

His phone started vibrating and took him out of his digression. Keith looked at the screen and sighed at the amount of texts he was receiving. Apparently Pidge had put him in a group with Hunk, Allura and Matt in which they discussed cryptids. He opened the chat room, said hi to everyone, added the contacts to his phone and muted the groupchat. He checked Lance’s chat and saw a bunch of new photos and some useless texts, which he ignored because he had nothing to say to them. Casual approach meant not forcing conversation, so if he didn’t know what to say, he’d say nothing. Shiro hadn’t texted anything else to him, so he had some time to kill before having to go back to the counter.

He put his phone into his pocket and stretched lightly, standing up from the chair he was sitting on. Keith spent the rest of his free time organising things in the storage room; he figured the best way to keep his mind off of everything was to keep it occupied. Kolivan had asked him to stop doing that because it was technically work and he shouldn’t work during his break periods, but what Kolivan didn’t know wouldn’t kill him. And even if he did catch Keith organising shelves, it wasn’t the worst thing that could happen. He had never caught Keith in the middle of a blowjob or a wanking session or a mental breakdown - all things that had happened to his fellow co-workers.

The coffee shop Keith worked at, the Blade of Marmora, was a weird place with weird people. Kolivan, the one in charge there, was a tall, muscular, serious, white man with a scar on his right eye and bleached platinum hair. The other man in charge was Antok, an extremely quiet man with muscles for days, as tall as Kolivan; he had a black power and piercing blue eyes and no one ever questioned his heritage - people were as scared of Antok as they were of Kolivan. The other members of the staff were all of normal stature and even when muscular, never anywhere near Antok or Kolivan, but they were either too quiet or too serious. Keith was probably the most normal person working there and considering the amount of trouble he had gotten in at previous jobs for being kind of an outcast was bewildering.

Keith had gotten way better at controlling his own temper, but when he first started working at the café, he had gotten in trouble with a few customers, co-workers and even with Kolivan. He had learnt some of his lessons and in order not to pick many more fights he withdrew and started being more introspective. It wasn’t ideal, but it worked. For the most part, at least.

Kolivan had been like a mentor to Keith, helping him learn how to tame his own emotions better and be less explosive. And Keith was very thankful to him for that; which was one of the reasons he ended up staying at the Blade of Marmora even though it was the weirdest way he had ever worked at. His salary was decent and he had someone watching his back; it was good.

As his lunch break was over, Keith went back to the counter to keep working. There was one specific customer who pissed Keith off, but he managed not to jump on the guy, which resulted in Kolivan nodding to him after the customer left - which was the biggest sign of approval he could get. Apart from that he kept making and serving the orders as they came, no big deal, no stress. Keith liked the fact that his life was mostly quiet, he’s had enough action in his early years already.

On his way home he put his earphones on and tried avoiding listening to any songs from The Paladins. It wasn’t necessarily completely conscious, but he was definitely doing it. He walked to the supermarket to get the things Shiro had asked him and found a magazine with Shiro’s face in it. It was weird. It was about the mystery new drummer of The Paladins and Keith decided to buy one copy of it so he could read it properly later. When Keith got to the apartment, he went to his room to put his bag in there and got the groceries bags, the tupperware and the cutlery so he could take them to the kitchen.

“Keith?” Shiro asked from his room.

“Kitchen.” Keith answered and started washing the dishes. They had a scheme, Keith washed the dishes and Shiro cooked because Keith could only make oatmeal, chicken, eggs and noodles and that was all they would eat if depended on him. Shiro entered the kitchen and sat down by the table. “In one of the groceries bag. There’s a magazine.” Shiro hummed and Keith heard him go through the bags.

“It’s me.” Shiro’s voice was low and Keith hummed. “That’s...”

“Weird? Yeah.” Keith chuckled. “I didn’t read it. What does it say?” Shiro hummed and Keith heard him flipping through the pages.

“I quote.” Shiro cleaned his throat before continuing. “Who is The Paladins’ hot new drummer? Takashi Shirogane, better known as Shiro, made his appearance in the comeback concert of The Paladins a week ago, proving himself to be somewhat suited for the place. After being announced that their cute bassist, Lotor, was leaving the band for ‘personal reasons’, most fans wondered if it would be the end of The Paladins. But the broad and muscular figure of Shiro, the hero, appeared from nowhere to save the day.” Shiro paused and Keith chuckled. It was surreal that the media was portraying Shiro as this hyper masculine sexy figure when Keith knew the real Shiro was the figure of an adorable father who baked cookies and was overly worried when his kids stayed out for too long. Shiro continued. “Much to our content, the mysterious ex-bassist continues living his partying life and is, apparently involved in a new project already. Hunk, The Paladins’ most adorable member and previous drummer, is now playing the bass and rocking it as expected. But one question remains: is Shiro, the hero, here to stay? If so, the fan base seems to be divided between those who desperately want Lotor back and those who seem to be fans of Shiro already. We, from the  _Glossip Magazine_ , believe Shiro’s potential to be as big as his muscles and thoroughly support his stay, but whether he stays or not we’re looking forward to having the chance to stan him in future projects. And then there’s a series of quotes of fans against and in favour of me in the band.”

“That’s bizarre.” Keith dried his hands on his pants. “Shiro the hero.” He laughed loudly and was hit on the head by the magazine. “You’re in the spotlight now.”

“Yeah...” Shiro sighed. “I didn’t think they would be this quick.”

“You should’ve imagined. I’m surprised it took them this long. And that they didn’t mention...” Keith pointed to Shiro’s prosthetic arm.

“They’re going to eventually.” Shiro shrugged. “We need to talk. Sit down.” Keith froze in place. It was something serious; Shiro was using his serious voice. Did he know about Lance and Keith? Was he going to tell Keith he shouldn’t do that? Tell Keith he was disappointed Keith didn’t tell him about it? Keith sat down, eyes on Shiro the entire time. “I need you to keep your cool, okay? And we have to discuss a bunch of things we won’t really have the time right now to, but...” Shiro sighed.

“Is something wrong?” Keith frowned and Shiro shook his head.

“I should’ve told you yesterday, but you were out and I didn’t want to... I thought you’d freak out and maybe cancel whatever you had, I don’t know...” Shiro sighed again. Ok, maybe it wasn’t about Lance, that was good. Maybe Shiro didn’t know about them. About what had happened. Keith started to calm down. “It’s something we’ve been discussing for a while now. From the very beginning, actually, but we depended on Allura’s final say and she only gave us a yes this week.” Shiro held Keith’s hand. “I’m in.”

“You’re in?” Keith frowned for a second before it hit him. “Shut up!” He held Shiro’s hand too strongly. “Shut the fuck up!” Keith started giggling. “Oh my God! You’re in! Wait, wait. But... Like... For how long? I need details, I need... Holy shit, Shiro, that’s so cool!” Shiro smiled at Keith. “Oh my God! Holy crap.”

“For... ever?” Shiro offered and Keith stood up and started pacing around. “I knew you’d freak out.” Keith was mumbling curses and praises and giggling like a maniac and Shiro watched him, smiling. “Which means I’m going on tour with them. And we leave tonight. I know it’s way too sudden and you’ll have to deal with life without me for two whole weeks without a heads up, so we’ve got to talk this through properly.”

“Okay, okay. I can freak out about my  _brother_  being officially a part of my  _favourite band_  later. Sure. No big deal.” Keith said loudly, trying to point out how absurd that all sounded and Shiro chuckled. Keith kept mumbling for a while until he managed to calm down enough to sit down again. “This is surreal. Absolutely out of normality.”

“I know... I can hardly believe it.” Shiro admitted. “Ground rules: don’t burn the flat down, I’ll be leaving my credit card and I want you to use it. I’m serious, Keith. No going around until late at night and trying to come back walking or by bus. We don’t know the extent of all this yet, we don’t know if people are going to start freaking out about you too, you know the fan base, you know some people do go that far.”

“Yeah, yeah, okay.” Keith agreed. In any other circumstances, he would’ve argued, but he knew Shiro had a point. Especially when he knew the Lotor stans didn’t like Shiro at all. “Two weeks?”

“For now.” Shiro nodded. “It’s going to be a short tour, so I’ll be back soon. We’re working in the new album already, so we need to be back for that.” Keith’s jaw dropped slightly. “And I’m allowed to discuss things with you under the guarantee you won’t talk about them with anyone.”

“I don’t have any friends.” Keith shrugged and Shiro narrowed his eyes. Keith knew Shiro hated when he talked like that. “I won’t, I promise. I wouldn’t do anything that could jeopardise your job.”

“I know.” Shiro smiled and Keith nodded. “So I’ll be back in two weeks and I expect to come home to both you and the flat safe and whole. Order dinner in or buy frozen food, you shouldn’t spend two whole weeks eating noodles and oat. Call me if you need anything and don’t ignore my texts.”

“You’ll check up on me every day and you’ll probably facetime me at some point too.” Keith raised one eyebrow, smiling. “It’s probably going to be harder for you than for me, Shiro. And I’m not the one who goes around losing parts of myself.” Keith joked and Shiro chuckled. “About that...” Keith took a deep breath. “What if someone asks?”

“You know I have no problems talking about it.” Shiro said and grabbed Keith’s hand. “But I can change the subject if you prefer. It’s not just about me.”

“No it’s... It’s okay.” Keith shrugged. “I don’t like talking about it, but I don’t mind it when you do.” Keith smiled. “Do the band members know?”

“Matt knows, obviously. So Pidge probably does to. But Allura was the only one who asked, so I assume Hunk and Lance don’t. Lance seemed curious at first, but he got over it pretty quickly, actually. Hunk never asked about it and Pidge asked about the mechanics of it, but really naturally.” Keith hummed. Well, Lance kind of knew, but he wasn’t going to mention that to Shiro. “Pidge told me they put you in their cryptids and conspiracy theory groupchat. How does that feel?”

“Weird? But not unnatural? I’ve been chatting a lot with Pidge on instagram, actually. They give me a lot of shit because they found my blog and know I’m a fan, but they promised not to tell anyone. And they’re nice, I feel comfortable talking to them, it’s not a huge thing anymore.” Keith shrugged. “Matt is... Well... Matt. The usual. You know how he always sent me stuff and we exchanged some messages online, so that’s the same. And Hunk and I kind of bonded over photos of baby animals, so we just send photos of baby animals to each other back and forth.” Keith was so close to praying for Shiro not to ask about Lance.

“I’m glad.” Shiro’s smile widened. “I was a bit... Worried. That it would throw you off balance. How welcoming and... Clingy... They all are. Especially Pidge.”

“Because I’m a fan?” Keith chuckled and Shiro shrugged. “No, I’m good at separating stuff. Besides, I love their music, but it’s not like I grew up dreaming of marrying them and with their faces up on my wall.”

“Well...” Shiro hesitated and Keith regretted his own words immediately. “You had it pretty bad for Lance.”

“Had. When I was sixteen.” Keith rolled his eyes, heart starting to race upon entering dangerous territory. “Besides, he’s... Weird. In person, I mean. At the backstage he was weird, I don’t know. He’s not exactly an accessible diva. He’s just a diva.” Shiro narrowed his eyes slightly.

“He’s not a diva. Lance is... He’s going through things. But that’s his own personal business, so...” Keith shrugged as if he didn’t care. But he did. “You should give him a chance if he tries contacting you. He’s a good friend.”

“Yeah... If he does.” Keith answered and hated himself for it. He was straight up lying to Shiro’s face. That was bad, very bad. If Shiro found out he had lied, Shiro would be hurt. “I’m happy for you, Shiro. I really am.”

“I know.” Shiro chuckled and let go of Keith’s hand. “I need to finish packing my stuff.” Keith nodded and they both stood up and walked to their rooms. Shiro hugged Keith for a second before entering his own room.

As soon as he was in his own room and his door was closed Keith grabbed his phone. He couldn’t risk Shiro finding out he had lied. There were a bunch of messages from Lance, one of them being a selfie from him and his bag ready and closed behind him. Lance was smiling wide, eyes closed and making the peace sign. Keith wanted to scream. Lance was online, so Keith seized the opportunity to text him.

 **Keith: Hey I need a favour?  
** **Lance McClain: yeah?  
** **Keith: I might have let Shiro understand that we don’t talk?  
** **Lance McClain: ?  
** **Keith: So if you could keep cool about it? By not telling anyone, I mean.  
** **Lance McClain: yeah.. sure.  
** **Lance McClain: don’t worry ;)  
** **Lance McClain: u home?  
** **Keith: Yes.  
** **Lance McClain: cool cool cool cool cool  
** **Lance McClain: I’ve finished packing and I’m bored so I was composing  
** **Lance McClain: but that’s a secret ~~  
** **Keith: So why would you tell me?  
** **Lance McClain: um, rude???  
** **Lance McClain: it’s fine as long as I don’t show you anything** **¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ ️  
** **Keith: I was let into a secret just know.  
** **Lance McClain: he told u _today_?????  
** **Keith: That’s Shiro and I.  
** **Lance McClain: I’m not judging. but we travel tonight  
** **Keith: I was informed. Twice already.  
** **Lance McClain: I thought u knew already good thing I didn’t mention it yesterday Shiro would’ve been pissed at me  
** **Keith: He wouldn’t.  
** **Keith: He wouldn’t even know about it.  
** **Lance McClain: oh yeah  
** **Lance McClain: so we’re keeping yesterday a secret too right?  
** **Lance McClain: I’m letting Rolo and Nyma know, if it’s okay? cause they know everyone so they might mention it and  
** **Keith: And we don’t want that.  
** **Lance McClain: yeah.. we don’t want that  
** **Keith: Thanks for understanding.  
** **Lance McClain: nah chill  
** **Lance McClain: it’ll be our dirty little secret ;pp ;PPPP** **  
****Keith: Please don’t ever phrase it like that again... It sounds so bad.  
** **Keith: And is the inappropriate use of inappropriate or ominous emojis a requirement to be in the band?  
** **Lance McClain: loooool I’m just kidding lol** **  
****Lance McClain: but chill about it ok?  
** **Lance McClain: and nope it isn’t lol that’s just us  
** **Keith: Thanks again, Lance.  
****Lance McClain: look!!!!**

Lance texted Keith a selfie of him and his guitar. He was shirtless and Keith was definitely going to die at some point if they kept up that pace. He answered Lance telling him to put his clothes and was flooded by several photos of Lance flipping him off. He was definitely going to die.

He spent the rest of the evening chatting with him and with the cryptids groupchat. Apparently they all had one thing in common: they talked a lot. All of them. Keith could get used to that.

As the time for them to leave approached, they were slowly vanishing, all of them but Lance. He kept sending Keith updates of every step of his way. Keith felt guilty for not having told Shiro anything and figured Shiro would probably find out the truth if Lance kept texting him that much during the tour. Shiro knocked on the door and Keith locked his phone screen.

“I’m going.” Shiro smiled at him. “Call me. If you need anything.” Keith stood up and walked up to Shiro, who hugged him tight.

“I’ll be fine.” Keith hugged him back. “Keep me updated, okay?” Keith tightened the hug. “I’ll do the same.”

“Okay.” Shiro caressed his head and Keith closed his eyes for a second. “See you in two weeks, Keith.”

“See you in two weeks, brother.” Keith let go and Shiro did so too, nodding to Keith. Keith didn’t follow him, he knew they were both too dramatic when it came to goodbyes, so that way was better. It was just two weeks, no more than that. And apparently they would focus on their new album after they were back, which meant Shiro would be around again and everything would go back to normal.

Keith took a deep breath and lied down again on his bed, listening to the front door close as a dramatic teenager would. He closed his eyes for an instant, taking in all of the recent and suddenly changes in his life. It was a lot. His phone vibrated and he thought of Lance. Another very crazy thing that was happening in his life. He sighed and stayed like that for a while, thinking about how his life was probably going to turn upside down because of Shiro’s new job.

He was happy for Shiro. A stable job as a drummer in a band that had made it to top ten on Spotify worldwide was a huge thing. But that was the deal: it was a huge thing. He knew their life would most likely be a mess for a while, that people would pry. It had potential for ruin. And Keith was happy with his job and his simple ways. He didn’t want to lose that. He hoped he wouldn’t lose that. And he was truly happy for Shiro, more than he was worried for himself. He opened his eyes and checked his phone, about thirty minutes had passed. Keith opened Lance’s chat and texted him.

**Keith: Have a safe trip.**

His phone vibrated before he could lock it.

**Lance McClain: thanks  
** Lance McClain: I’ll let you know when we get there if you want  
Keith: I do.  
Lance McClain: okie dokie  
Lance McClain: talk to you later, Keith  
Lance McClain: have a good night  
Keith: You too. 

Keith stood up and marched to the kitchen to eat something before getting ready for bed. The flat was awfully quiet already and Shiro had just left. Keith sighed and promised himself he would be fine until Shiro got back and reminded himself that being physically alone didn’t mean being really alone.

  
****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i honestly hope it worked, but if the body of the chapter only contains a link it means it didn't... i don't know what's up with ao3.  
> anyway, expect chapter 4 this friday (hopefully properly posted if ao3 stops lagging)  
> EDIT: DFLALFÇKDS I FIGURED OUT THE PROBLEM WAS THE EMOJIS INCLUDED IN THE TEXT which might be a problem in the future HMMM but we'll see, we'll see


	4. You are bringing out a different kind of me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith and Lance go to the arcade together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! finally i figured out what was causing the trouble and it was some emojis (which might end up becoming a problem eventually, but we'll see). thanks for the kudos and comments <3 they're always appreciated!  
> thanks baem for supporting me so much <;3  
> chapter two was named after a part of shawn mendes' "nervous"; chapter three after a part of the all american rejects' "dirty little secret" and this chapter after a part of shawn's "fallin' all in you".
> 
> i hope you like it!

Two weeks went by relatively fast. Keith facetimed Shiro every night - by Shiro’s request, and actually ended up facetiming Lance twice. Lance was drunk the first time and had texted Keith the next day asking about it because, apparently, he didn’t remember it at all.

He had said Keith’s name once that first time, whispering it and laughing while pointing out, again, it was their dirty little secret. Lance seemingly flirted with him the entire time, but Keith didn’t mention any of those things when he told Lance about it. So Lance asked him if he had liked doing that and if they could do it again, with a sober Lance that second time around and Keith agreed to it.

Keith’s phone was filled with Lance’s face from the selfies he insisted on sending, but also with a bunch of photos he’d gotten from Pidge and from Shiro, so he had to disable the automatic saving function, but didn’t have it in him to delete all the pictures. When he facetimed Lance the second time Lance was ready to go to bed, so he was rooming with Allura. He called Keith “mullet” and “mullet head” the entire call and made sure not to say Keith’s name once. Keith was thankful for it, even if he hated that nickname with all his heart and soul.

It was late at night when The Paladins arrived back, so Keith only saw Shiro the next day after his job. But he figured they were all tired because his phone was silent the whole day. He got the first text as soon as he left the Blade of Marmora.

**Lance McClain: honey I’m home ;)**  
**Keith: Yours or mine?**  
**Lance McClain: oh is that an invitation?**  
**Keith: Absolutely not.**  
**Lance McClain: wanna hang out?**  
**Keith: I’m free tomorrow if you are.**  
**Lance McClain: wow that was easy**  
**Lance McClain: I’m not complaining btw**  
**Lance McClain: here’s the proposition: arcading**  
**Keith: What time?**  
**Lance McClain: after lunch? so around 2pm?**  
**Keith: Deal.**  
**Lance McClain: I can’t wait to kick your ass at shooting games** **;)**  
**Keith: I’ll kick yours first in all driving ones, so. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯**  
**Lance McClain: he uses emojis** **:oo**  
**Keith: He does. What’s the address of the arcade?  
** **Lance McClain: I’ll text it to you later!!!**

Keith put his phone into his pocket to get down from the bus and walk to his building. So, apparently, Lance would keep his word and “hang out” with Keith again. Which meant they would probably argue about who would be paying what again, since Lance had tried to convince him he’d only let Keith pay last time because he was going to pay the next one. Keith tried not to be bothered by the use of “hang out” again. He was confused about whatever he had going on with Lance.

Sometimes it seemed as if they were flirting and other times Keith felt like Lance treated him as a lifelong friend. That would be weird enough already if Lance didn’t act all flirty with Keith, since they’d known each other for weeks. Three weeks. Not even a month. Sure, from what he’d heart from Shiro that was just how Lance worked. Not that Keith had brought Lance up; he hadn’t. Shiro had. Which made Keith panic about whether Shiro knew the truth, but, apparently he didn’t. Keith had seen Lance in the back one of the times he was facetiming Shiro and Shiro had noticed and asked Lance to say hi - because Shiro was the sweetest, but also that kind of asshole.

“Hey.” Keith had said, seemingly uninterested, getting a glare from Shiro that he knew meant ‘be nice’.

“‘Sup, Shiro’s lil bro.” Lance had answered and grinned.

“I have a name, you know?” Keith had said and narrowed his eyes; Lance had hummed in response and excused himself from the conversation.

“He’s... Not usually like that.” Shiro had looked at Keith apologetically. “Actually he’s very warm and befriends people easily. It would be creepy if he wasn’t so good at understanding and respecting people’s boundaries. Because Lance is an open book, for most part.” Keith had shrugged and changed subject. Later that night Lance had texted him asking if Shiro had suspected anything and Keith replied telling him that if he ever called Keith ‘Shiro’s lil brother’ again he would be introduced to Keith’s fists. Lance had texted ‘not quite the way I’d like to, I imagine’ and Keith had changed the subject, happy that Lance couldn’t see how much he was blushing.

Keith had a pretty solid routine, so if Shiro heard him get into the flat he would wait for Keith to be in the kitchen to go say hi. As expected, Shiro followed Keith into he kitchen and hugged him before Keith could begin washing the dishes.

“Welcome back.” Keith hugged Shiro back and Shiro let go. “Missed me?” Keith joked. Shiro rolled his eyes, smiling, and sat down. “You’re the last band member I talk to since you all came back and you literally live with me.”

“Am I?” Keith knew that had enticed Shiro’s curiosity.

“Group chat, remember?” Keith shrugged and started washing the dishes.

“What about Lance?” Shiro’s tone was hopeful for some reason. Oh. That had been Keith’s mistake. Of course.

“Out of the ones who aren’t assholes.” Keith shrugged again, but that was very unfair of him and he thanked the universe for the fact that Shiro would never tell Lance he had said that.

“Keith.” Shiro reprimanded him and Keith hummed. “You’ve talked to him _once_.”

“That was barely talking.” Keith felt so bad for lying to Shiro, but what was he supposed to do?

“Either way, Lance is a good guy.” Shiro insisted. Keith was going to regret his words so much.

“He’s a womaniser who didn’t even spare a proper glance to the brother of the band’a drummer, who is probably so full of himself from all the attention he gets that thinks he don’t have to be a fucking decent human being just because he’s famous or whatever. Seems pretty assholish to me.” Keith really hated himself at that moment. “Besides, from what I gathered all the times he was shouting in the background of our facetimes, the guy seems really loud, annoying and obnoxious.”

“Keith!” Shiro raised his voice, using his dad tone. Keith hated his dad tone. “I won’t have you talking about my friend that way when you don’t even _know_ him. You can’t judge a book by its cover and even if you could, you would’ve gotten Lance all wrong. So unless you have actual contact with him and draw those conclusions, which is impossible, you’re not going to talk like that about Lance again.” Shiro was right and Keith knew it.

“Can we, please, change the subject?” Keith could feel his shame. He hated when Shiro used that tone and he hated that situation because he was lying through his teeth and talking awful things about Lance when he knew Lance was none of those things he had tried to portray Lance as. He was met with deadly silence from Shiro and he knew Shiro was mad at him, and rightfully so. “I got the message, okay? Can we drop it?”

“I’m glad I came back to a safe and whole flat.” Shiro answered and Keith was immensely grateful. He wouldn’t survive having Lance as a topic of a full length conversation and lie to Shiro the whole way through.

“You underestimate my cooking abilities.” Keith heard Shiro’s chuckle. “I learnt how to cook rice, so that’s good.”

“And you didn’t even burn the kitchen down in the process, that’s amazing.” Shiro chuckled again and Keith glared at him, not really angry or annoyed.

“That was _one_ time.” Keith dried his hands on his jeans. Shiro raised one eyebrow. “Fine, it happened four times, but one of them wasn’t really my fault.”

“Oh and whose fault was it?” Shiro’s eyebrow stayed risen.

“It was father’s fault for leaving a kid in the kitchen unsupervised.” Keith shrugged and crossed his arms.

“Father left you for literally two seconds, Keith.” Shiro chuckled and Keith pointed his index finger at him.

“See? Thus leaving a problematic child unsupervised in the kitchen. Father’s fault.” Shiro shook his head, laughing harder. “I’ll take the blame when I’m the one at fault. That time wasn’t on me.”

“Okay, three incidents of our kitchen catching fire. Still not a very good number if we consider I set fire to our kitchen a grand total of zero times.” Shiro pointed out and Keith shrugged.

“I can’t help it if fire loves me.” He said and Shiro laughed harder. “Anyway. How’s your schedule from now on?” Keith changed the topic, not really interested in being made fun of for a lot longer.

“We’ll have three days off, counting today, and then we’re off to working on the new album. We won’t go to the studio just now, though. We have one song already in progress. Lance wrote a lot on tour and Hunk had some ideas already too. Allura wants to talk to us about whether we have a concept for the new album yet or not and, apparently, Lance has something in mind, so next week will probably be focused on that?”

“Which means you’ll stay out for most part.” Keith pointed out and Shiro nodded, humming.

“We’re probably staying at Matt’s or Hunk’s for the most part. That’s usually where they spend their time during the creative process.” Shiro scratched the back of his head. “But we’ll have some rehearsals too. Allura said we’re good right now, but she wants us to be perfect. Which means she wants _me_ to be perfect.” He chuckled. “And Matt was talking to me about taking you to a rehearsal one of these days. If you’d like to. We would have to pass that through Allura, but I think she’ll be fine with it once she meets you.”

“I don’t think that would be... The most comfortable thing for me?” Keith admitted. He wanted to. He really did. But he wasn’t sure he would be able not to freak out. He knew the band members were regular people, he managed to talk to them and all, but seeing them rehearsing was something else entirely. It wasn’t even about them, it was about their music and how important it was for Keith. So he’d rather be safe than sorry. Shiro nodded.

“I understand. You don’t have to. It was just an idea.” Shiro smiled at him and he smiled back, faintly. “Just to be safe: they might come over at some point. You know that, right?”

“Yeah. It’s fine.” Keith shrugged. “This apartment is yours too, you know. I just... Going to the studio or whatever... I don’t want to seem like a crazy fan.” Shiro nodded.

“You won’t. But I get it.” Shiro’s voice was reassuring and Keith smiled a bit wider. “I better go back to unpacking, though. I just woke up. I was exhausted.”

“I can imagine. If I get tired after a week of work and I don’t travel around... You must’ve been half dead.” Keith walked towards the door and messed up Shiro’s hair when he approached Shiro. Shiro chuckled. “If you need help let me know.”

Shiro nodded and Keith went to his room. He decided to take a shower, so he took off his clothes and got his pyjamas, taking them and his phone to the bathroom with him. Lance was texting him selfies that were very bad for his sanity, so he decided to set his phone aside before he did something he would regret doing. Jacking off to the idea of Lance when he was sixteen and horny was different than doing that when he was twenty two and actually knew the guy. Keith waited for the water to be hot and got into the shower, trying to relax. His day at work had been pretty fine, but for some reason he could feel all of his muscles tensing up.

Keith spent a while under the hot water before finishing his shower, drying himself and getting dressed again. He went to his room and lied down, plugging his phone in the charger, checking the address Lance had texted him and how long it would take him to get there before quickly replying to him and to the groupchat before opening the YouTube app to watch some conspiracy theory videos before falling asleep.

It was eleven in the morning when Keith woke up again. He got out of bed and stretched for about 20 minutes before going to the bathroom, peeing and washing his hands and face. Keith went to the kitchen, walking past Shiro’s bedroom and finding its door oddly closed – it was eleven thirty already and that was considered late by Takashi Shirogane’s standards. He figured Shiro was probably still tired and wanted to appreciate sleeping properly and on his own bed after having spent two whole weeks away.

He made himself his regular oatmeal and green tea and sat down at the table to savour his breakfast. Keith was a simple man when it came to food. He had gotten used to that from an early age and even after moving in with Shiro’s family – who were, by Keith’s standards, obsessed with food – he never left that part of his upbringing behind. He finished breakfast at midday and decided he should wake Shiro up or Shiro would sulk the entire day for having spent too much of it asleep. He knocked on Shiro’s door twice before entering and finding Shiro deep in his sleep. Keith walked towards him, smiling.

Carefully, he sat beside Shiro in bed and observed him for a while. He wasn’t wearing his prosthetic. He never did to sleep. The sight still made Keith feel a void in his chest, so he shook his head and touched Shiro’s back lightly. Shiro hummed faintly.

“It’s late.” Keith said and Shiro hummed a bit louder. It was something in between a hum and a groan that Keith couldn’t quite understand. “It’s midday, Shiro.”

“No.” Shiro said and put his hand on Keith’s face, which made Keith laugh.

“Hey, be my guest to keep sleeping, just don’t complain later.” Keith said and Shiro opened one of his eyes up to stare at Keith. “Hey.”

“Morning.” Shiro groaned properly this time and took his hand to his face to rub both his eyes.

“It’s midday already, so…” Keith pointed out and Shiro groaned again. “I’m going to be out today.”

“Oh?” Shiro properly sat down on the bed and frowned slightly. “Is it the same guy from last time?” Keith shrugged. “I thought you’d said it wouldn’t happen again.”

“I…” Keith sighed. “That’s not really what I said. I said it wouldn’t grow from there.”

“And the difference is?” Shiro yawned. Keith shrugged. “You still don’t want to talk about it.”

“Yeah.” Keith admitted and Shiro nodded, ruffling Keith’s hair. “It’s just not a big deal. We’re just hanging out.” Shiro nodded again and Keith removed Shiro’s hand from his hair. “So get up soon and be quick using the bathroom ‘cause once I get in it I’m just getting out when I’m ready to leave the flat.” Keith stood up.

“Yes, sir.” Shiro chuckled and Keith rolled his eyes. “Send mystery guy my regards.” Keith looked back at Shiro, not glaring, just looking, with a blank expression, and then left to his own room.

He would most definitely _not_ send Lance Shiro’s regards. He was in such a big mess, wasn’t he? He was 1) lying to Shiro, 2) going out with Lance a _second time_ without knowing whether it was a first, a second or not a date at all and 3) asking Lance to lie to Shiro and possibly everyone else. Keith shook those thoughts away. He didn’t need to deal with any of them because that would be temporary. He would tell Shiro the truth eventually. Or maybe he and Lance could just stage a first meet and that would solve things. No, Keith knew that would be just more lying and you don’t solve lying with more lying. He grabbed his phone and sent one of the videos he had watched the night before to the groupchat, then checked Lance’s chat. The last message he had received was from the night before.

**Lance McClain: hey check this out what do u think**

Lance had sent him a photo of a floral button up shirt.

**Lance McClain: I got it a while ago but it only arrived now and I’m not sure I still like it?**  
**Lance McClain: r u asleep? u r probably asleep**  
**Lance McClain: sleep tight, mullet head**  
**Lance McClain: see u tomorrow at the arcade**  
**Lance McClain: I hope u like chocolate!**

Keith figured it wasn’t necessary for him to reply since they were going to see each other in a couple of hours, so he didn’t. He opened up his _The Walking Dead: No Man’s Land_ app and played for a while, until he had to start getting ready.

When said time came he went to the bathroom so he could shower, planning on washing his hair. It took Keith about half an hour to finish getting ready. He decided to put some mascara on just in case and went back to his room to choose an outfit. Not knowing whether Lance considered they were going out on a date or just hanging out as friends made things a bit hard. He decided to put on skinny black high waisted jeans ripped at the knee, a grey crop top with an alien patch on its left side, black leather Chuck Taylor Converses and wrap a purple flannel around his waist. He showed his abs a bit, but not too much so his outfit could be considered both sexy and casual. Keith had to confess he had spent some time of the night before coming up with that outfit.

Keith grabbed all of his belongings and was ready to leave the house.

“See you later.” He stopped by the kitchen door to say goodbye to Shiro.

“Take my credit card!” Shiro stood up, still holding his coffee mug.

“No, it’s fine.” Keith stopped him before he could walk out of the kitchen. “Shiro, please…” Shiro rolled his eyes, but nodded, going back to his seat.

“Text me if you need anything.” Shiro used a more serious tone and Keith waved his hand at him, nodding and turning his back to Shiro, who was still talking. “Be safe and if anything happens call me and I’ll send an Uber your way. You have my credit card registered in your Uber app, right? Keith?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll be fine Shiro.” Keith answered and opened the apartment door. “I’m heading out now.”

“Be safe.” Shiro said one last time and Keith left. It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate Shiro worrying, but Shiro was worrying more than the usual. Maybe because this time he knew absolutely nothing about where Keith was going or who he was going with and Shiro had a dad-like protective mentality, but still. Keith was a grown adult. He put on his headphones and listened to music on shuffle all the way to the arcade.

As always, Keith got there early. He was ten minutes early, but Lance was already there, waiting for him, leaning on the wall next to the door. He was wearing pale light blue ripped jeans with their ends rolled up, a white t-shirt with thin black stripes on the torso and back and bright dark blue short sleeves, white Converses, a pair of dolphin socks, aviator sunglasses, a black snapback and a dark brown messenger bag. Lance smiled wide when he saw Keith and waved at him. Keith approached Lance and smiled back.

“Hey!” Lance automatically threw one of his arms around Keith’s shoulder and Keith just snuggled closer to him. “How you doing?”

“Fine. You?” Lance led them into the arcade, not bothering taking his sunglasses off. Keith took his earphones off his ears and put them into one of his pants’ free pockets; Lance didn’t let go of him the entire time.

“I’m peachy.” Lance held Keith a bit closer to him. “Okay, have you eaten already? ‘Cause I haven’t and I’m kinda hungry, so maybe we could grab a snack?”

“Yeah, that sounds good.” Keith agreed and Lance smiled wider, leading them to a cafeteria in one of the ends of the arcade complex. “Was it easy for you to wake up today?” Keith asked and Lance’s expression turned into a confused one. “Shiro only woke up because I woke him.” Keith explained and Lance hummed.

“Nah. But I guess I’m used to it and Shiro isn’t.” Lance hummed. “I only get knocked out when we travel abroad.” Lance smiled again and Keith nodded. “Did you tell him you’re seeing me?” Keith frowned at Lance’s choice of words. He probably meant to ask if he told Shiro that he was going to see Lance that day, but it was an unfortunate way to phrase it, considering Keith didn’t know whether that was a date or not.

“No.” Keith answered and Lance hummed. As they approached the counter to order whatever they wanted to, Lance let go of Keith. Keith looked at the menu and decided he was going to ask for a regular double cheeseburger with fries and orange juice. Lance ordered a special burger with cheddar and bacon, fries and a coke zero.

“What are you doing?” Lance asked, holding Keith’s wrist as Keith got his card from his wallet. Keith sighed and opened his mouth to answer, but Lance interrupted him. “Not what we had agreed on.”

“We didn’t agree on anything, Lance.” Keith pulled his arm from Lance’s grip. “Debit, please.” He said to the cashier, who looked puzzled.

“You’re not paying.” Lance said a bit higher and Keith winced, feeling a bit embarrassed. “He’s not paying.” Lance said to the cashier, who was clearly very confused.

“Keep it down.” Keith glared at Lance. “I’m not arguing with you. I’m paying and that’s it.” Lance crossed his arms. “You can pay yours if you insist.”

“You win this time, but just you wait. Next time I’m paying, mullet.” Lance pointed his index finger at Keith, who rolled his eyes. The cashier handed him the machine and he typed in his password.

“Stop calling me that.” Keith said, not looking at Lance. “Thanks.” He smiled at the cashier, who nodded and smiled faintly at him.

Lance paid with cash and as he was done their orders were ready, so they grabbed their trays and took them to the nearest table. They sat down facing each other and started eating in silence for a while. Keith was the one to break the silence.

“Are you okay with the whole Shiro thing?” He asked. “Not telling him about this, I mean.” Lance looked up; he hummed and took off his sunglasses, hanging them on the collar of his shirt.

 “I noticed you don’t share much, so I didn’t ask anything because I don’t want to pry or make you uncomfortable.” Lance shrugged. “You have your reasons.” He smiled at Keith. “Whatever they are, I’m fine with it as long as you are.”

“You’re okay with lying to Shiro?” Keith raised one of his eyebrows.

“No.” Lance admitted. “But I didn’t have to until this point, so…” Lance put a fry into his mouth, chewed and swallowed. Keith waited. “Like I said, I’m fine as long as you are. You’ll tell him whenever you’re ready, I guess.”

“Aren’t you curious, though?” Keith wanted to know. Lance chuckled.

“Very. But I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” Lance smiled wider. “And since we touched this topic… You don’t answer much when I text you. If my texting annoys you feel free to say that.”

“No, it’s fine. I like texting you.” Keith shrugged, admitting that. He could do it, right? I wouldn’t be weird to admit he liked talking to Lance. “I’m just very…”

“Reserved?” Lance chuckled. “I got that. I don’t mind it, I just don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“You said that about three times already.” Keith pointed out and smiled at Lance. “You’re not. I’ll let you know if you are.”

“Cool.” Lance’s smile grew wider.

Lance changed subjects all of a sudden, asking Keith if he believed in aliens. That was all it took for Keith to start a rant about how it is literally impossible for us to be alone in the universe, considering how big it was.

They talked for a long time, not stopping even though they had finished their meals already. Keith enjoyed that; he enjoyed having someone other than Shiro to talk to. Sure, he kind of had Kolivan, but it wasn’t the same as a… Friend? He wondered if he could consider Lance a friend of his and decided to do so. They had to be friends, right? They talked every day and they could discuss anything; Lance shared a lot about him with Keith and Keith shared some bits and pieces of his likes and dislikes with Lance too; they had hung out once before already and that was their second time, so they were probably friends.

After some time, Lance stood up and told Keith the time had come for him to beat Keith’s ass in the arcade. Keith smirked at Lance and told him he’d better get ready to get wrecked. They walked together, Lance held his hand at some point and he felt his heart starting to beat faster, to the cashier so they could buy two cards and credits to it so they could play.

Lance decided that they would start with a fighting game because “he didn’t want to start off humiliating Keith” right away. They were equally good at the game, so Keith won, but barely; that meant Keith got the tickets from the machine, not Lance. Next they went for air hockey and Keith won again, so Lance challenged him to a shooting game. Keith lost. Spectacularly. Lance was happier than he probably should be. That set the competition mood between them.

Game after game, the two of them started getting more and more heated up. Keith was a sore loser, but Lance wasn’t too different from him. Every game was a different opportunity to crush the other. Keith tried hard not to get too worked up about losing, but he failed at it. Lance was as bad as Keith at pretending he didn’t mind losing.

In the end Keith had won a total of 21 times and Lance a total of 20. They both had enough tickets to get nearly anything they wanted from the prizes stand, but at first that didn’t really matter to any of them. Lance was visibly upset for having lost and Keith had to swallow his own pride not to be too excited about having won. It was hard, but he managed.

It didn’t last long. As soon as they got to the prizes stand Lance got distracted with the possibilities and went back to his regular bubbly self.

“Aw, man, I really wanted that stuffed octopus!” Lance complained and pouted when he realised he didn’t have enough tickets to get it. Keith counted his tickets and handed them to the person responsible as Lance tried to move on and pick another prize for him.

“I want the octopus.” Keith almost whispered and the person on the other side nodded, grabbing Keith’s tickets and counting them again before putting them away and grabbing the octopus to hand over to Keith. Lance was biting his lower lip and telling the other employee in the stand he wanted the blue plastic cup with a crazy straw instead. “Hey.” Lance looked to Keith after grabbing his cup and Keith handed him the stuffed octopus. “Here.” Lance’s eye widened.

“You…” Lance got the stuffed octopus from Keith’s hands and hugged it close to his chest. “You didn’t have to.”

“I know.” Keith shrugged and looked away, feeling himself starting to blush. He heard Lance giggle and smiled faintly. Lance got closer to Keith and kissed him on the cheek.

“You’re my hero.” He said and Keith froze in place. Keith was going to die. “Now I feel kind of bad because I didn’t think of getting you something.”

“Think of it as a consolation prize.” Keith shrugged and Lance stopped smiling for a second, what made Keith grin.

“You laugh now, but you weren’t laughing while I kicked your butt on the shooting games.” Lance put the octopus on top of the counter so he could put his funny cup in his bag. He grabbed the octopus again and hugged it with one arm, holding Keith’s hand with his free one. Keith intertwined their fingers.

“Whatever makes you feel better.” Keith chuckled and Lance pouted. “Hey, no need to pout, sharpshooter.” Keith gently pulled Lance closer by the hand and pinched one of his cheeks before realising what he was doing. Thankfully they were interrupted by one of the people from the prizes stand.

“Excuse me…” They said very gently. “We were wondering… Could you…” They handed Lance three pieces of paper and a pen and Lance smiled widely at them.

“Yeah, yeah! Sure thing, honey.” Lance said and winked. “What are your names?” He asked and the three employees smiled widely, blushing slightly. Lance let go of Keith’s hand to grab the pen and autograph the papers.

“I’m Rose.” One of them said and Lance wrote ‘to Rose, who has the prettiest hair I’ve ever seen, love, Lance x’. “Thanks!”

“Mine’s Luan. L, u, a, n.” Another one of them spelled. Lance wrote ‘your smile is beautiful, Luan, love, Lance x”.

“And I’m Joan.” The last one said. Lance wrote ‘to Joan, may your eyes never stop shining that brightly, love, Lance x’.

The three of them, seemed happy with Lance’s words and thanked him a thousand times. Lance smiled at them and said his goodbyes, waving at Keith so he followed Lance. Keith nodded at them, smiling faintly, but they were too busy chattering about Lance’s autograph to notice. He was actually thankful for that. Apparently he was still just a nobody and he liked that a lot. Maybe not having the same last name as Shiro was his saving grace.

Lance was quiet as they walked to the door of the arcade. Keith checked his phone, it was five in the afternoon already.

“Do you want to go get ice cream?” Lance asked, holding his stuffed octopus close to him. Keith nodded. “I actually live nearby an ice cream shop, so maybe we could go to my flat and drop Pulpsy there first?”

“Pulpsy?” Keith raised an eyebrow.

“That’s how I named her. It was the second name I thought of. Pulpo means octopus in Spanish and Pulpsy sounds cute.” Lance smiled wide, very proud of himself.

“What was the first name?” Keith was curious and Lance coughed, visibly uncomfortable. “Oh my God, Lance.”

“What?” Lance’s eye widened a bit.

“It was octopussy, wasn’t it?” Keith laughed a bit too loudly and Lance blushed. “That’s priceless.”

“Also highly inappropriate.” Lance chuckled. “I guess gay minds think alike, huh?” Keith nodded, still laughing. “So I settled with Pulpsy. ‘Cause it’s… Better.”

“Agreed.” Keith took a deep breath, trying to stop laughing as hard. “But sure, we can do that. Drop Pulpsy off, I mean.” Lance smiled and got his phone. “What are you doing?”

“Asking for an Uber.” Lance replied and continued before Keith could continue. “Which I would do anyway if we weren’t going to grab ice cream, so don’t worry about it.” Keith hummed and didn’t say anything.

On their way to Lance’s building they talked about Lance’s interest in marine animals and how he loved the beach. Keith couldn’t relate at all, he hated the sand and the sun was not too gentle to his very pale white skin. Lance held Keith close to him, running one of his hands through Keith’s hair and holding Keith’s waist with his other hand.

Keith was a bit reluctant about going to Lance’s flat, so he decided to wait Lance outside of his flat. I seemed huge and it probably was, considering that each floor of the building only had one apartment. Keith wondered for a second just how much Lance got from The Paladins because money didn’t seem to be a problem for him at all. He wouldn’t ask, of course, but he could only imagine it was a lot.

It only took Lance a minute to put Pulpsy in his room and go back to Keith. He offered Keith something to drink and Keith politely declined, so he locked his door and they went to the ice cream shop. Before they could argue about it, Keith made sure to tell Lance he was paying for his own ice cream. Lance didn’t pressure Keith into accepting his offer to pay that time around and Keith was thankful for it.

They both got bowls of ice cream. Lance, once again, got a bunch of flavours and toppings and Keith almost felt offended. Keith got lemon pie, chocolate and peppermint flavoured ice cream; Lance did convince him to try jelly worms as a topping, which was surprisingly good.

Lance chose a more reserved table for them to sit on, so they wouldn’t be bothered by anyone as they ate. Keith hadn’t paid a lot of attention to that as the day had gone by, but in retrospect, people did seem to be staring at them a lot. The only people who approached them were the people from the prizes stand, but Keith remembered a lot of people whispering and pointing at them. More specifically, pointing at Lance.

They continued talking about animals and Lance told Keith about his old dog, Zula, a huge golden retriever he missed dearly. She had passed away a bit after The Paladins had their first record come out. The song “Blue” from the second album was about her; Lance had written it the day his mother texted him about it. Keith changed the subject fairly quickly, but subtly; not because he minded talking about sad things, but because he didn’t really feel comfortable talking about band related things.

Those topics made him remember why it was so odd for him to be there, they made him remember Lance wasn’t just Lance, he was Lance McClain, vocalist of The Paladins, Keith’s teenage celebrity crush. And he didn’t want to put Lance in that place anymore because now Lance was his friend. If Lance noticed how Keith changed the subject every time it ended up being The Paladins, he didn’t mention it.

Keith’s phone started vibrating and he ignored it the first time, but had to check it out when it started continuously vibrating again. Shiro was calling him; he showed it to Lance and Lance nodded, staying quiet so Keith could pick it up.

“Hey.” Keith said and winced slightly at Shiro’s serious tone on the other side of the line. “Sorry, I didn’t realise it was this late.” He answered and Lance checked his own phone for the time. It was nine in the evening. They had been talking for literal hours and hadn’t even realised. “No, I’m fine. Sorry, Shiro. I should’ve given you a heads up that I was going to stay out ‘til night time.” He sighed. “I know. Sorry.” Keith hummed and waited a while. “No, I don’t. Okay.” He paused again. “Don’t worry, I’m fine.” Another pause. “No, I don’t.” Keith hummed. Lance raised one eyebrow at him and he shook his head, smiling at Lance lightly. Keith chuckled. “Will do. Sorry for worrying you.” Keith paused one more time. “I will. Bye.” Keith chuckled lightly and hung up. “He was worried you were a maniac because I never answered any of his texts.”

“In his defence, we _have_ been out for long.” Lance smiled and Keith chuckled. “Shiro’s very protective, isn’t he? He scolded me at some point during the tour for, and these were his words, making myself too vulnerable too often.” Lance chuckled. “He was referring to me getting drunk four times.” Keith nodded. “I almost regretted helping convincing Allura to let him stay because now they’re both all over me and I can’t keep being too reckless.” Lance shrugged. “Happens.”

“Do you get drunk often?” Keith asked, trying to divert the topic from the band again and Lance shook his head.

“Not really. I do tend to get very drunk when I do get drunk, but most times when I drink I barely get tipsy.” He shrugged. “And I don’t drink too often anymore. I used to…” Lance swallowed audibly and paused for a second. He took a dee breath and stopped himself before continuing, letting it out and licking his bottom lip as he breathed again, then he settled for a faint smile, looking into Keith’s eyes. “Do you?”

“I got drunk _once_.” Keith admitted. “I was seventeen, so still a minor, and I puked my life out of me. Shiro had to help me out and made sure I never had access to the liquor cabinet again. I do drink wine and champagne in special occasions, but I’m never going to drink whiskey again in my lie.” Keith said, disgusted, and Lance chuckled.

“I _hate_ puking. I’m good at holding my alcohol, but it happened to me a couple of times already and they’re always awful.” Lance put his elbow on the table and rested his chin on his hand. “We should get drunk one day. I can keep an eye on you so you don’t overdrink.” Lance smirked.

“Maybe.” Keith hummed.

“I have wine back in my place.” Lance’s tone was different. “We could go back and have a few glasses if you want.” He raised an eyebrow and Keith’s heart felt like it was about to explode.

“Are you trying to get me drunk, McClain?” Keith raised an eyebrow too and Lance chuckled. “Not tonight.”

“Is that a promise?” Lance asked and Keith bit his own lower lip, hesitating.

“It’s a promise.” Keith gave in. To hell with it. Whatever Lance had in mind was probably nowhere as dirty as all of the things that had already crossed Keith’s mind in the last few years. Besides, Keith had observed Lance’s ways and he knew most of the times Lance’s flirting wasn’t serious, so that was probably one of those times. “I should probably head home, though.”

“Shiro’s that worried?” Lance’s smirked turned into a sweet understanding smile and Keith nodded. “Want me to call you an Uber?”

“No, I can do that. Thanks.” Keith smiled and stood up. Lance did the same and wrapped one of his arms around Keith’s waist, holding him close as they walked outside.

Keith asked for an Uber using the app and Lance didn’t let go of him for a second.

“Thanks for today. I had a lot of fun.” Lance smiled at him and Keith smiled back.

“Me too.” Keith stopped looking at Lance’s face and looked at his phone screen. The driver would take ten minutes to arrive. That was a lot of time.

“We could do this again sometime.” Lance moved behind Keith and put his other arm around Keith’s waist, hugging him from behind and resting his forehead on Keith’s shoulder. They were almost the same height, Lance was probably one or two centimetres shorter than Keith was. “Or whatever, really. I just have a lot of fun hanging out with you.”

“I work a lot, but I’m taking my next day off next week, if you’re free we can think of something.” Lance hummed in response. Keith looked at his phone again, the car wasn’t moving, but he didn’t mind.

“Isn’t Shiro going to mind?” Lance asked and Keith frowned, even though Lance couldn’t see his face. “I mean, I imagine he doesn’t know who you’re out with, right?”

“Yeah.” Keith admitted and Lance hugged him tighter. “Shiro knows I can take care of myself. I had to for a while, after the accident. He was at the hospital for a while and I had to take care of everything back home, since it was just us.”

“You don’t talk to your parents?” Lance questioned. Keith knew he didn’t mean to be invasive, but he couldn’t help but tense up a little but at the question. “Sorry, you don’t have to talk about it.”

“No, it’s… Fine.” Keith sighed. Lance had shared so much with him, it was only fair that he shared at least a bit with him. And judging by the fact that the Uber wasn’t moving at all in the app’s map he probably had some time before the driver arrived. “Shiro’s dad was friends with my dad. He was a police officer and my father was a fireman.” Lance snuggled his face closer to the crook of Keith’s neck. “I’m adopted, by the way. I don’t remember my mom, she died when I was a just a baby. My dad died in a very bad fire when I was fourteen, going on fifteen and the Shirogane family took me in. I was already friends with Shiro from an early age because of our parents and all that.”

“I didn’t know that.” Lance said and kept holding Keith tight.

“Yeah… Matt is the only one who knows.” Keith nodded and Lance hummed. “Shiro’s dad died…” Keith hesitated wondering if he wanted to talk about it and concluding that wasn’t the best time. The Uber driver’s car started moving relatively fast in the map. “A few years later. Shiro and I were both over eighteen already.” Lance kissed Keith’s skin; it made Keith shiver, but Lance’s kiss was sweet, not lascivious. “Anyway, all that to say: Shiro knows I can take care of myself, but since father was out on most nights on police duty and Shiro is older he used to take care of me so sometimes his dad instincts just kick in.” Keith chuckled.

“You two are very close, aren’t you?” Lance commented and Keith hummed. “That’s cool. I wish my older brother was around to worry like that about me. Marco moved to France with his husband, Luis lives in Brighton and Veronica lives with our parents in Brazil. So I’m all by myself here, since my grandparents passed away a little after I turned eighteen.” Keith put his free hand on top of Lance’s. “I’ve had Matt, who’s, like, a really cool older brother for all of us. And Allura is like an older sister too. And sometimes a mother. And now we have Shiro, who’s our lame older brother slash cool dad.” Keith laughed at that statement. “But it’s weird with his whole thing with Matt, so maybe I shouldn’t call him our cool dad if Matt is our cool older brother? Or maybe I should promote Matt to the very bad dad because Matt manages to be more irresponsible with the children, that being us, than I am.”

“You’re _very_ weird, you know that, right?” Keith said and chuckled. Lance did the same. “Uber’s going to be here in two minutes.” Lance hummed and let go of Keith. He opened his bag and got a box from the inside.

“You never answered me if you like chocolate, but…” Lance chuckled, visibly embarrassed. “I bought these for you on tour. I hope you like them.” Keith smiled at Lance, who wasn’t looking directly into his eyes.

“Thanks, Lance.” Keith said and took the box. “I do like chocolate.”

“I made sure Shiro didn’t see it, so it wouldn’t be weird or anything.” Lance said and smiled faintly. Keith’s smile widened. Lance looked at Keith’s lips, or it seemed like it from where Keith was standing, and lick his own. Keith heard a car pull over and looked back, checking the license plate. “That’s yours?”

“Yeah.” Keith looked back to Lance and quickly kissed him on the cheek. “Thanks again.” Lance kept staring at Keith while he turned his back to walk away.

“Oh, baby, I hate when you leave, but I _love_ watching you go.” Lance said and Keith flipped him off, making Lance laugh. “Learn how to take a compliment, mullet.”

“Learn how to make one.” Keith opened the door of the car and glanced back at Lance for a second, smiling.

“Let me know when you get home.” Lance said and Keith nodded. “See ya.”

“See ya.” He replied and entered the Uber. “Sylvia?” He asked the driver, who was smiling at him.

“Yeah. Keith?” They asked back. He nodded. “May I ask you your pronouns?”

“He, him, please. What about yours?” Keith smiled at them. That was the first time any Uber driver had asked him that question.

“She, her.” Sylvia smiled back at him and started moving. “I’m so sorry I had you waiting, I had to stop to fill the tank and had to deal with some harassment. I don’t know if you saw my message.”

“Oh… No I didn’t. But it’s fine, I’m not in a hurry, so…” Keith answered and she nodded. “I’m sorry you had to deal with that, though.” Sylvia shrugged.

“Happens. Unfortunately.” She sighed. “Do you want water or some candy, Keith?” Keith shook his head. “Is there any radio station you’d like to hear?”

“No, any station is fine.” Keith replied. “It’s not a long drive anyway, so…” Sylvia nodded and turned the volume up, not changing the station.

It took them ten minutes to get to Keith’s building. He thanked Sylvia and rated her five stars, leaving her a very nice compliment on the app before entering the building. Keith took the chocolate to the kitchen, grabbing one from the box to take it to his room with him. Shiro was already in his own room, so Keith carefully knocked before entering. He wasn’t asleep yet and Keith apologised again for worrying him. Shiro smiled at Keith and apologised for freaking out. Keith went to his room, changed into his pyjamas, plugged his phone to the charger and went to the bathroom to use the toilet, wash his hands and face and brush his teeth before going to bed.

Back in his room, Keith unlocked his phone to text Lance.

**Keith: I’m home.  
Keith: I ate one of the chocolates and it tasted really good.  
Keith: I’m going to bed now cuz I work tomorrow. But thanks for today. ** **< 3**  
**Lance McClain: !!!!!!!! it was fun af right?**  
 **Lance McClain: I’m glad u liked it!!!! I was scared u wouldn’t lololol**  
 **Lance McClain: night, keefer <3333  
** **Lance McClain: Pulpsy says night too**

Lance sent Keith a photo of him, hugging the stuffed octopus and kissing it. Keith hugged his stuffed hippo, a gift he’d gotten from Shiro when he had moved in with the Shirogane family, took a selfie with him and sent it to lance.

**Keith: Hippo says night back.**   
**Lance McClain: first things first: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**   
**Lance McClain: u almost gave me a heart attack**   
**Lance McClain: but also u named your hippo Hippo, keith, that’s,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,**   
**Keith: I named him something too big and never remembered it again, so I call him Hippo.**   
**Keith: Don’t judge me, I was a literal kid.**   
**Lance McClain: I’d never judge u, keef. I’m scared that’ll get my rights to getting selfies of u revoked and I don’t want that**   
**Keith: Good night, Lance.**   
**Lance McClain: night, cariño ;)**

Keith rolled his eyes and smiled at Lance’s text after throwing the nickname into google translate and learning Lance had basically called him “sweetheart”. He was definitely fucked, but at that exact moment he couldn’t care less.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the text "Lance McClain: night, keefer" was supposed to include the shark emoji, the blue heart emoji (every heart sent by lance is the blue heart), the starry eyes emoji and the sparkles emoji; the text "Lance McClain: first things first: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" was supposed to be two heart eyes emoji, two clapping emojis and two blue hearts emoji, not the exclamation points, but ao3 doesn't let me do emojis.  
> i made a [playlist for the fic on spotify](https://open.spotify.com/user/playlandi/playlist/2vr6vymACCES9lHyLx2Qf4?si=XlmFxYmISimyOxHSnCKHxA), which i plan on updating as i go. some songs might not make a lot of sense at this point in time, but they're all songs that either are a part of the fic or inspired me in my creative process, so ~
> 
> if you want to reach out to me outside of ao3 you can do it through either [my les mis blog](https://whensunscollide.tumblr.com) or [my personal messy blog](https://marsisnotcreative.tumblr.com). i also have the link to all my other social media there!


	5. Don't be a fool

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith goes to Lance's a apartment and one of their friends finds out they're hiding something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, everyone! here comes another chapter. thanks for all the comments and the love, i hope you enjoy this one as much as you seemed to have enjoyed the previous chapters :D  
> CW: we talk about "character" death in this chapter and cover a bit of depression, i suppose. so just be warned about it.
> 
> the title of this chapter is the name of a shawn mendes' song (listen, i love shawn mendes ok? dlsjafdsjdfs)

Keith barely made it through the week because he was very anxious for Friday. Lance had managed to get his night free from anything Paladins related and his Saturday too – just in case, he had said and Keith had chosen to ignore that comment. He knew Lance wanted to see him that day, but he didn’t know what Lance had in mind until very late at night on Thursday, so he spent the entire week looking forward to having Lance text him the specifics.

They day after their second encounter – that was what Keith was calling them for now, encounters. Because he didn’t have it in him to call them dates, but he couldn’t deny they had been somewhat odd to be just two friends hanging out – Lance spent texting Keith the whole time. Keith had gotten his first notice at work because of using his phone too much but he didn’t care; he was happy. Just friends or more than friends, Keith was sure of one thing: he was friends with Lance. And that was the coolest thing in the world.

He had saved all of the photos Lance had sent him of the stuffed animals collection Lance had. He had also sent Lance photos of his own collection, of course. Lance reacted with a string of emojis to each photo Keith sent his way; it was adorable and made Keith’s chest warmer. Lance had also sent Keith a video of him singing Shawn Mendes’ Mercy and playing it on the guitar and Keith had marked it as a favourite.

As the rest of the week went by, Keith talked more with Pidge in their private chat; they had grown very close after bonding over cryptids and conspiracy theories, so their conversations ended up being about literally anything. Once the band started their creative process, Lance started texting Keith less, so they facetimed once in the middle of the week. Lance had asked Keith if he was okay with Lance playing the guitar and singing while they facetimed and Keith knew he should’ve said no, especially considering it was late at night after a particularly tiring work day and, but he was weak, so he agreed to it. Almost an hour into them facetiming – twenty minutes after Lance had started singing –, Keith had fallen asleep to Lance’s voice.

When he woke up the morning after, Lance had texted him a screenshot of him asleep and captioned it as “cute, but not too cute to be free of being blackmailed” and a heart-eyes emoji. Keith had been stupid and he _knew it_. And if he had been stupid solely because he had given Lance blackmail material on him he would’ve been lucky. Not, he had been stupid because he was starting to get involved. He realised that on Thursday night, when he fell asleep before getting Lance’s usual goodnight text and felt kind of upset about it. When he woke up the next day he had received multiple texts from Lance.

**Lance McClain: r u asleep?????**  
**Lance McClain: nooooooooo keefer**  
**Lance McClain: u r WEAK, mullet, that’s what u r**  
**Lance McClain: anyway**  
**Lance McCain: tomorrow (today??? it’s past midnight already hmmmm), Netflix and chill whatcha say??? ;))))**  
**Lance McClain: I’ll let u choose the movie and the bright side is:**  
**Lance McClain: wait for it**  
**Lance McClain: waaaaaaaaait for it**  
**Lance McClain: :**  
**Lance McClain: we won’t argue over who’s paying cause no one’s paying (unless we order pizza but since u’ll be the guest I’ll be paying of course)**  
**Lance McClain: u know where I live so expect u here at 4pm tomorrow/today aka Friday !!!**  
**Keith: See you at four.**

Keith spent his whole morning anxious about going to Lance’s apartment. He decided to do things so he kept his brain from worrying too much, so after breakfast he started cleaning the house. Shiro woke up in the middle of him organising the living room and didn’t question, just saying good morning and going straight to the kitchen instead. Keith kept on organising everything and dusting every surface. He entered Shiro’s room and tried to be quick there since Shiro was in the kitchen; he decided to vacuum the whole apartment before going to his own room, starting with Shiro’s, so Shiro could go back inside if he wanted to.

“Are you okay?” Shiro asked, sitting down on the couch, feet on top of it so he didn’t get in the way of Keith’s cleaning. Keith frowned at him, a bit confused. “I’ve known you for eighteen years. Believe it or not I picked up on some of your quirks. For instance, you stress clean.”

“I do not.” Keith switched the vacuum cleaner off for a second and stared at Shiro, who chuckled. “Maybe I do.” He shrugged. “I’m fine, I’m fine… I just…” He sighed. “You know the guy from last week? I’m seeing him again today.”

“Oh.” Shiro’s eye widened. “He’s the one who gave you the chocolates, right? We never got to talk about _that_.” Shiro smiled wickedly.

“And we won’t.” Keith shook his head and Shiro wiggled his eyebrows. “Oh my God, Shiro, stop!”

“Aw, come on, Keith, tell me about it! I’ve been dying to ask and it’s your third date with him.” Shiro insisted. “Tell me _anything_!”

“Anything?” He questioned and Shiro nodded, clapping excitedly. “Well, I don’t even know if it’s a date, for starters. Or if any of the times were.”

“He bought you chocolate, Keith.” Shiro said as if that was an obvious answer.

“He’s that weird.” Keith said and shrugged. “Sometimes I honestly think we’re having a thing, but other times he keeps bro-ing me hard, Shiro. And he’s so open with everyone, so when he’s open with _me_ it doesn’t feel any different because that’s just… Who he is?” Keith started playing with the hems of his pyjama shirt. “So there’s nothing to tell you because I don’t know what’s happening.”

“Maybe tell me about where you two went, how it was, his name…” Shiro tried and Keith realised he shouldn’t talk anymore. They were getting into a dangerous territory. “Anything. Maybe I can help you figuring it out. Do you talk often apart from when you go out?” Keith hummed. That last bit of information was actually a bit safer, he figured.

“We talk every day. We text a lot. The whole day, actually. And we facetimed a few times too. But, like I said, he’s like that with everyone, I think.” Keith shrugged. “Anyway, I still don’t want to talk about it, so…” Shiro pouted. Takashi Shirogane actually pouted. That made Keith roll his eyes and shush him. “Go to your room and leave me to my stress cleaning, go.” Shiro chuckled and nodded.

“Okay, okay. But don’t think you can avoid me forever. I know where you live.” Shiro joked and went to his room.

Keith had to be careful. He knew Lance hadn’t told anyone about them being friends on purpose, but he didn’t know if Keith hadn’t told people about him hanging out with someone. He didn’t know how much of their secret encounters people knew about without knowing Keith was the one Lance was meeting. He would have to ask Lance that, just to be sure he didn’t let anything too compromising slip when Shiro questioned him again. Because he knew Shiro would.

Especially since he had been going out with Lance for a while now and Shiro knew it was the same guy. Keith could’ve lied, he could’ve told Shiro it was a different guy, but he felt bad enough for having lied about Lance already. Which was something he still had no idea how he was going to solve, but he really didn’t need to stress about _that_ too, so he went back to his cleaning.

By the time he had finished organising and cleaning the apartment, Shiro has finished cooking them lunch. They had a pseudo risotto Shiro had made; it included, obviously, rice, onions, ham, mozzarella cheese, some carrots and peas. It tasted very good and for Keith that was more than enough. Shiro was a great cook and managed to make incredible dishes with whatever they had at home and Keith was thankful for that because he was awful in the kitchen and they usually didn’t have a huge variety of ingredients anyway. Unless Shiro did grocery shopping; if it depended on Keith they’d survive of eggs, noodles, rice and chicken – and some occasional apples and bananas too.

Keith started to get ready to go to Lance’s at two pm. He took a shower, washing his hair, and actually got a backpack ready, since he didn’t know whether he was going to spend the night or not and he liked being ready. He put on a pair of ripped dark blue straight jeans, his high top red Converses, alien socks, a simple plain black t-shirt and his black denim slightly oversized jacket. He was staying at Lance’s, so he didn’t need to get overdressed, plus Lance had seen him in his pyjamas _and_ asleep the last time they facetimed, so Keith felt like he didn’t need to put extra work into dressing incredibly nice. He liked dressing well, so he did, but he didn’t need to stress over that above all things.

In his backpack he made sure he put his wallet, keys, phone charger, his best pyjamas –which was an old black t-shirt that used to belong to Shiro and stripped grey pants –, his red fluffy sleepers and a new pair of socks and underwear. He had his phone in his pocket, so he didn’t put it in his bag.

“Shiro, I’m going.” Keith knocked on his door. Shiro opened it up.

“Are you going camping?” Shiro asked and Keith rolled his eyes.

“Ha, ha. No, I’m going to his apartment.” Keith pointed at the backpack. “This is just in case I stay the night. So don’t worry and don’t wait up, ‘kay?”

“Call me-“ Shiro started speaking.

“If anything happens, yes, I know.” Keith smiled and hugged him. “Also, I saw you put your card into my wallet. I’m not using it.” Shiro chuckled.

“I was hoping you only noticed when you were out.” Shiro admitted and hug Keith back, patting his back. “Be safe.”

“Always am.” Keith let go and punched Shiro’s chest playfully before going to the door.

Keith was _very_ anxious. To the point where he couldn’t listen to music on his way because he couldn’t focus, so he decided to play 1010! on his phone when he was in the bus. He had to take two buses to get to Lance’s and then walk for a few minutes, which was fine, honestly. He tried taking in the view as he walked, but his heart was beating faster by the minute. Keith had to take a few deep breaths when he got to Lance’s building.

He pressed the button on the intercom and the building’s doorkeeper’s voice came from it. Keith told them he was going to Lance McClain’s apartment, told them his name and waited until they opened the gate for him. The doorkeeper told Keith to wait for Lance by the elevator, so he did so. He was kind of uncomfortable walking around alone through that building anyway. Lance greeted him with a very wide smile and a tight hug, pulling him into the lift as soon as the doors were opened. Keith hugged him back, shyly.

“Hey, Keefer!” Lance said and Keith could hear how excited he was. “How are you doing? Was it easy to get here?” Keith nodded and let go of Lance, realising they had probably been hugging for a bit longer than the necessary.

“It was fine. I’m fine. You?” Keith asked and leaned back against one of the metal walls, crossing his arms. Lance nodded, still smiling at him. It didn’t take long for them to get to Lance’s floor. The doors opened and Keith entered Lance’s apartment for the first time, needing some time to take in how big it actually was. Lance let him have some seconds while he locked the door behind them and took Keith by the hand.

“Apartment tour!” Was all Lance said before guiding Keith into every room of the apartment.

He had a kitchen at least two times as big as Keith and Shiro’s. His living room had one of those technological fire places Keith had only seen in movies before, a huge TV and a bunch of different video game consoles. Lance had a room with his instruments – he owned a variety of electric and acoustic guitars and a piano –, which, as Lance informed him, was the room he did most of his writing and composing. He also had a room that used to be a guest room, but he had turned into a home theatre. His room was definitely two times Keith’s plus a bit and he owned a king size bed that made Keith feel very intimidated; Lance had _two_ bathrooms in his apartment, one connected to his room and another one for the guests. He also had a space for doing laundry. Inside his apartment. Keith was in awe.

They left Keith’s bag in Lance’s room and Lance guided him, still by the hand, to the home theatre.

“Do you want something to drink? I have beer, water, juice, tea, coffee…” Lance offered.

“Just water.” Keith answered, sitting down on the couch and Lance nodded.

“Make yourself at home. If you want to take off your shoes so you can put your feet on the couch… Just… Make yourself comfortable. I’ll be right back.” Lance smiled and left the room. Keith took his opportunity to text Shiro, letting him know he was safe at his friend’s apartment. Shiro answered with a winking face and Keith didn’t answer him back.

Lance didn’t take long, but took long enough for Keith to get used to the place he was at, so that was good. He brought a tray with two plastic cups and a huge cold water jar and put it on top of the small table in the middle of the room. Lance served Keith first and then himself, then he sat down next to Keith, leaving some space between them, which was… Unusual.

“You can say it.” Lance said and chuckled. “Everyone does when they come here the first time, it’s okay.”

“It’s the biggest apartment I’ve ever seen?” Keith confessed, still a bit in awe. “How… This is a rude question, but how did you get this place?”

“Oh, it used to be my grandparents’. They left it for me when they died. As part of the heritage.” Lance shrugged as if it was nothing. Lance McClain was a heir to an apparently really wealthy family and acted as if that was nothing. If Keith had thought at any point he was beginning to understand Lance that was the exact moment he knew he didn’t understand Lance at all. He also apparently didn’t know anything about Lance at all. “ _This_ is why I’m always insisting on paying the bill. The money left me plus what I get from the band is… More than enough for me. So I like treating my friends, you know? My parents always taught me that money is worth nothing if you keep it to yourself.” He shrugged again as he took a sip of the water. Keith nodded.

“Another rude question: how do you keep this from the press?” Keith asked. “You don’t have to answer though…” He said, acknowledging how intrusive his question was. Lance chuckled.

“No, no, it’s fine.” He smiled at Keith. “Illegal methods is your answer.” Lance ran his free hand through his hair. “I’m not exactly proud of that. I’m actually not proud at all, but… Allura and I kind of bought their silence?” He wasn’t looking into Keith’s eyes anymore, he was looking down. Keith grabbed his hand and Lance looked up. “I hope you don’t think less of me for that?”

“I’d never think less of you for wanting privacy, Lance.” Keith offered Lance a smile. “To be fair, I kind of envy the fact that you’re able to do that and… Well… Shiro and I probably won’t and eventually the press is going to start prying.” Lance blinked a few times, frowning slightly. “I hope _you_ don’t think less of me for this. And when that finally happens.”

“I can do it if you want.” Lance squeezed Keith’s hand. “Buy their silence for you two.” Keith’s eyes widened.

“No!” Keith quickly said. “God, no. Lance I won’t let you pay me dinner, do you really think I’d feel comfortable if you did _that_?” Lance chuckled and nodded. “Please don’t. When the time comes… Shiro and I will figure something out. Maybe we’ll actually manage. Since his father never _actually_ adopted me? It’s… Complicated.” Lance nodded again.

“We don’t have to talk about it.” Lance said and Keith nodded, biting his bottom lip. “What do you want to watch? I have everything Disney, I don’t know if you like Disney, but I’ve got it. And a bunch of other stuff too.”

“Disney’s fine.” Keith shrugged. “The Lion King?” He suggested and Lance beamed, smiling. “And maybe Lilo and Stitch after that? Or Tangled?” He let go of Keith’s hand so he could get the movies ready.

“We have time for all of them, Keith!” Lance said and sat back down closer to Keith than before; Keith could feel his heartbeat going slightly up again.

Lance switched off the light by _remote control_ and Keith gasped. Lance chuckled and pressed play.

By the time Mufasa died, Keith was already a sobbing mess and Lance pulled him closer, hugging him and kissing the top of his head countless times. Keith could feel Lance’s tears falling on his head, so he hugged Lance back and they stayed like that for the rest of the first movie. Lance’s hands were playing with Keith’s hair and Keith relaxed into Lance’s embrace. They didn’t move when the film was over, they waited a while into the credits, but eventually Lance had to put the next film.

In no time Lance was back in the couch and had one of his arms around Keith’s waist, keeping Keith very close. Keith put his head on Lance’s shoulder and held Lance’s free hand, interlocking their fingers. Lilo and Stitch was pretty chill to watch, until the end, when Keith cried a bit too. It wasn’t Keith if he didn’t cry in a Disney movie. When that movie ended they didn’t move at all until the end of the credits.

Three hours had passed and Keith felt like he’d been there for one hour, maximum. He could feel Lance’s uneven breathing due to him crying and snuggled closer to him. Lance chuckled and hugged him tighter. When the credits were over, Lance kissed the top of Keith’s head.

“How does popcorn sound?” Lance asked, still not moving. Keith hummed lightly, not wanting to let go. “You’re not asleep, are you?” Lance chuckled.

“No.” Keith’s voice was soft and he could feel Lance’s mouth curl into a smile, which made him smile too. “Popcorn sounds good. And I need to use the bathroom, so a pause would be good.” Lance hummed and Keith closed his eyes for a second. Something in the back of his head was trying to be loud and tell Keith to run, but he ignored that annoying little voice and took a deep breath.

“You know, you need to let go for that…” Lance provoked him and Keith elbowed him next to his ribs. “Ouch.” Lance laughed and pushed Keith to the side. Keith fell onto his side and realised Lance was climbing on top of him. “I’m going to have to teach you a lesson, mullet.” Lance said, casually, but grinning wickedly. Keith’s eyes widened ad he realised what Lance was about to do.

“Fuck off!” He managed to say before Lance started tickling him. Keith started laughing and contorting under Lance. “Oh my God, Lance.” Keith couldn’t breathe properly. He tried kicking Lance away, but Lance was stronger than he looked and managed to keep finding better spots to tickle Keith. “I’m going to murder you.”

“I doubt that.” Lance said and winked at Keith, who gaped at Lance and let his guard down for just a second. That was all it took for Lance to pin both his arms up and start tickling Keith’s free sides with his free hand. “That’s what you get for _elbowing_ me. In my _own_ home, mullet.” Keith couldn’t stop laughing as he tried to protest, letting Lance know how badly he needed to pee, and Lance’s grin started turning into a sweet smile as he gradually stopped tickling Keith. They were both breathing heavily and staring at each other. Lance’s eyes adverted to Keith’s lips for a second, then back to Keith’s eyes. It took Keith a while to catch his breath again. Lance did it again, letting his free hand rest on Keith’s waist. Keith swallowed loudly.

“I _really_ need to pee.” He said and Lance stood up very quickly, as if he had been electrified. Lance had his back turned to Keith.

“Okay, yeah. You know the way, right? I’ll make us some popcorn!” He laughed in a clearly fake way and Keith hummed. Keith went to the bathroom and used the toilet really quickly; he was barely holding himself because Lance had made him laugh that hard.

He stared at his reflection; he looked wrecked. His hair was messy and his face still a bit red. Keith took a couple of deep breaths, as he washed his hands, then he fixed his hair and washed his face, drying them with his own t-shirt and cursing himself mentally for not using the towel. He was just too used to using his pants or t-shirt to dry his hands and face at home.

Keith went back to the home theatre room and Lance wasn’t there yet, so he answered some of Pidge’s texts.

**Pidgeon: hey loser**  
**Pidgeon: heard u had a date eyes emoji eyes emoji keef**  
**Pidgeon: who r u seeing??? y havent u told me i thought we were FRIENDS keefer**  
**Pidgeon: r u going down on him???? how long has that been going on?????**  
**Pidgeon: keefster???**  
**Keith: It’s not a date.**  
**Keith: I don’t think.**  
**Keith: I’m not sure?**  
**Keith: We’re just friends.**  
**Pidgeon: dont lie to me keef**  
**Keith: I’m not lying, Pidgey.**  
**Pidgeon: tell me more tell me more**  
**Keith: I haven’t even told Shiro.**  
**Pidgeon: i can keep a secret eyes emoji eyes emoji**  
**Pidgeon: oh**  
**Pidgeon: keef tell me one thing just one thing**  
**Keith: ?**  
**Pidgeon: r u at his place watching movies by any chance?**  
**Keith: Are you fucking hacking my phone?**  
**Pidgeon: no dude wtf i wouldnt do that to u**  
**Pidgeon: r u at his place keef?**  
**Keith: Yes. Why?**  
**Pidgeon: keef keef keef u smooth smooth son of a gun**  
**Pidgeon: tell me one more thing keefer ma dude**  
**Keith: Shoot.**  
**Pidgeon: do u like butter in your popcorn?**  
**Keith: Yeah, why?**  
**Pidgeon: u can thank me later**  
**Pidgeon: also tell me abt it later**  
**Pidgeon: c:**

Keith frowned looking at his phone. Pidge was a weird person, he knew that, but that was weirder than the usual. Lance entered the room holding two buckets of popcorn.

“I didn’t know if you liked butter or not, so I put it in one and not in the other.” Lance said and smiled. Keith widened his eyes.

“Pidge knows.” He said and stared at his phone. “Oh my God, Pidge knows I’m here.” Keith glared at Lance, who looked very confused while putting the buckets on the table at the centre. “Did you tell them?”

“What? No!” Lance raised his hands in the air. “I swear to you I told them nothing! I didn’t even mention to Rolo and Nyma, I promise you, Keith!”

“They _know_ , Lance.” Keith put hands on his face. Lance held Keith’s hands and kneeled in front of him. “What if they tell Shiro?”

“They won’t.” Lance squeezed Keith’s hands. “Hey, hey, look at me.” Keith did so. “Do you believe me?” Keith narrowed his eyes, but nodded after a while, sighing. “We can talk to Pidge, explain to them that you don’t want anyone to know. We tell them we don’t want to discuss it and that it’s top secret. It’ll be fine, okay?” Keith nodded again, looking into Lance’s eyes. He thought they looked sad for a second, but Lance looked away quickly, calling Pidge from his own phone and sitting by Keith’s side on the sofa. “Hey, Pidgeon, how is it going?” He said as soon as they answered the video call.

“ _Sup, loverboy?”_ Pidge grinned on the other side of the screen. Keith hoped for death and hoped for it to be painless.

“We need to talk.” Lance said, very serious and Pidge dropped the grin, nodding. “Listen. You know something you shouldn’t know and God only knows how you found out.”

“ _Well, actually, I found out because I’m smarter than all of you._ ” Pidge said as if it was obvious and Keith changed his mind, he hoped he could squeeze that gremilin’s throat until _they_ died. “ _I just connected the dots, Lance. It wasn’t exactly hard._ ”

“No one knows, Pidge.” Lance kept his tone serious. “No one can know.” He said, voice a few tones lower than his usual. Pidge frowned for a second.

“ _Why?_ ” They questioned Lance. “ _Give me one good reason and I’ll never mention it again._ ” Keith froze for a second. He didn’t have a good reason. And neither had Lance. Because Keith never told Lance why he didn’t tell Shiro about it. But he had to say something or else he could be monumentally screwed.

“Shiro doesn’t know.” Keith said and Lance looked at him. Keith nodded and Lance let him into the range of the camera. “And I don’t want him to.” Pidge raised an eyebrow. “Pidge, please. You can’t tell anyone.”

“ _You’re the one who doesn’t want it out?_ ” They asked and Keith nodded. “ _Lance?_ ” Lance nodded and Pidge rolled their eyes, sighing. “ _I give up._ ” They said. Keith narrowed his eyes.

“I personally asked Lance to keep it a secret. Shiro thinks I hate him, actually.” Keith admitted and tried not to look at Lance’s face after he had said that. “I know it’s weird and I know I’m not giving you a good reason, but… I can’t do better than this. I’ll ask you to trust me on this and promise me you won’t tell anyone.” Pidge hummed on the other side of the screen and finally sighed.

“ _Tell anyone what?_ ” They asked, in a defeated tone. “ _Anyway, I need to go back to doing a thing, so I’ll talk to both of you later. Also known as in a few days because I don’t like how any of this thing I don’t know nothing about sounds._ ” Pidge said and hung up on them. Keith hugged his knees.

“Hey.” Lance touched his shoulder and he looked at Lance. Lance smiled at him faintly. “See? No one knows. No one’ll know.” Keith nodded. “Do you want a hug?” Keith nodded again and Lance hugged him, caressing his back. “It’ll be fine, okay? Pidge won’t tell anyone and everything will be fine.”

“Yeah…” Keith started to calm down. “Sorry…” Lance hugged him tighter.

“Don’t worry.” Lance kissed the top of Keith’s head. Keith felt like crap, but he just tried to relax into Lance’s arms as Lance caressed his back, carefully.

When Keith felt like he was feeling better he started pulling away from Lance’s touch and Lance let him do that. They were silent for a while, Keith was looking down and Lance allowed him to have that.

“Wanna watch Tangled now?” Lance asked after a while and Keith nodded, resting back on the couch. Lance pressed play on Tangled and pulled the table closer to them so they didn’t have to hold the buckets.

Keith immediately leaned on Lance’s said and Lance wrapped him by the waist. For most part, Keith managed to focus on the movie and sometimes on the popcorn, but as the scene with the lanterns was closer, Keith couldn’t keep his brain from going all sorts of places.

He didn’t even remember why he hadn’t told Shiro right away about going out with Lance. He didn’t even know why he wanted to keep that a secret. Keith was very confused about whatever was going on between them. They were friends and that was for sure. Lance cared about him; that was also certain. He cared about Lance; deeply. Lance was ridiculously understanding of his weird ways; he never pressured Keith into telling him anything and sometimes Keith felt like telling Lance everything just because. It was weird, it was new and he was scared of it.

Lance was patient and kind all of the time. Even when he was jokingly flirting with Keith, he made sure Keith was fine with that at all times. On the first sign of Keith being uncomfortable Lance would drop everything and give him space.

Keith realised he was crying and that Lance had started singing alone with the film. He closed his eyes, letting Lance’s voice fill his ears. Keith let his consciousness drift and fell asleep without meaning to. When Keith woke up, he was resting his head on Lance’s legs and Lance was running his fingers through Keith’s hair light and carefully.

“Morning, sunshine.” Lance chuckled. “You missed the end of the movie.” Keith hummed. “Is my voice _that_ boring?”

“What?” Keith looked up and met Lance’s smile.

“It’s the second time you sleep on my singing.” Lance explained his train of thought and Keith was in awe. Did Lance really have no idea what his voice did to him? That was rich.

“Your singing is actually very soothing.” Keith admitted. “Sorry to have slept on you again.” Lance shrugged. Keith didn’t move and closed his eyes again. “Father used to do that a lot for me to sleep. The hair thing.” Keith said and Lance hummed.

“It’s called ‘ _cafuné’_ in Brazilian Portuguese.” Lance’s voice was low, as if he didn’t want to disturb Keith. “Do you miss him?”

“I do.” Keith admitted. “I miss father more than my biological dad? Father is Shiro’s dad, by the way.” He explained. “I loved my dad, but I used to live on Shiro’s house, basically. Because my dad was always busy, being a firefighter and with all of the emergency calls. Shiro’s father had a regular working schedule, so I ended up getting closer to him. And after dad died I moved in with the Shirogane family, so…” Keith sighed. “I had a very bad time falling asleep. I was nearly fifteen when it happened and I was terrified of falling asleep alone, so I started sleeping with either Shiro or our father for a few months. Then father insisted for me to start therapy…” Keith paused.

“Did it help? Therapy, I mean.” Lance asked. Keith nodded.

“It did. But not right away. I started it at fifteen, but stopped when I was sixteen because I didn’t want to go anymore.” Keith chuckled. “In the meantime I actually found something that helped me out coping.” He laughed at the irony of Lance having thought his voice bored Keith when his voice had saved Keith’s life countless times. But Lance didn’t need to know that. “But then the accident happened… You probably asked Shiro about it, so you know that…”

“I actually didn’t.” Lance said and Keith opened his eyes for a second. Lance wasn’t smiling anymore, but his expression was soft, attentive even, looking back at Keith. “You didn’t seem comfortable talking about it and then you asked me not to tell Shiro we had met, so I never brought it up.”

“Oh…” Keith blinked a few times before closing his eyes again. “I was eighteen at the time. Shiro was twenty three and he was a part of a band that was actually kind of starting to make its name in more underground circuits, mostly bars. Father didn’t really like that, he thought it was dangerous, but he trusted Shiro. This one day we were…” Keith cleaned his throat. “We had picked Shiro up from a rehearsal and father was actually telling me how he thought I should go back to therapy because I was starting to have some pretty bad nightmares again about my dad and the fire, but I didn’t want to go back. So we were arguing and I hadn’t put my seat belt on and this other guy he just comes out from nowhere, smashed drunk, you know? And he hits us. Father tried getting out of his way, but he had looked at me through the rear view for a fucking second. And he was… So hurt…” Keith cleaned his throat again.

“We don’t have to talk about it, cariño.” Lance said and Keith nodded, continuing.

“I had told him, with all the arrogance I had at the time, that he couldn’t make me go back. I was eighteen and, besides, he wasn’t even my real father. So he looked at me for a _split second_ and that guy comes out of _nowhere_.” Keith could feel his eyes watering. “The car crashed against ours and father tried getting out of its way, which resulted in the car turning. I don’t remember much after that. All I know is that Shiro launched himself to the backseat to try preventing me from getting smashed and fucked up his arm real bad. Father was hit very hard. I woke up in the hospital two days later, breathing though some tubes and shit.” Lance took one hand off Keith’s hair to dry Keith’s eyes and caress his cheeks. “I needed some help walking again, but I was lucky enough to only have a scar on my chest and a few broken ribs. Shiro got his face scarred and lost an arm. The other driver died didn’t even manage to get to the hospital, he died right away. And father didn’t make it either; he was into a coma and his heart stopped three months later. I did go back to therapy after that, though. Father had left us a god sum of money in case anything ever happened to him, plus I found out I had the rights to some money my biological father had left me since I was eighteen already.”

“I’m sorry.” Lance said and Keith smiled at him faintly.

“It’s fine.” Keith said. “I used to blame myself. The depressed years were rough. But I was lucky that the worse thing I ever did to myself was eating poorly and not sleeping properly. Therapy helped a lot and I’m better now. I know it wasn’t on me. I don’t like talking about it, but I can. It doesn’t hurt that bad. I just miss him.”

“I get that. I miss my grandparents a lot too.” Lance said and Keith opened his eyes again. “Grandpa was ill ever since before I was born and he got worse every year. He had Parkinson and Alzheimer disease and eventually it got so bad he was in a vegetative state, so we had to put him in a hospital. He was feeding off of tubes and all that shit, it was pretty bad, but he wouldn’t go, you know.” Lance was smiling faintly. “At that time the band was already working on the second album and I wasn’t home a lot, so when my grandma fell ill too I couldn’t be around them a lot. I always told her to go to the doctors and do regular check-ups, but she would lie to me and say everything was fine when she hadn’t even gone in the first place.” Lance chuckled. “Grandma Margareth was a stubborn woman. She had to get things her way or not at all. So when they discovered she was sick the cancer had spread through her whole body. I was on stage when she died, so I only got the news the day after. Grandpa died three days later, as if he was waiting for her to go.”

“I’m sorry, Lance.” Keith said and held Lance’s hand that was on his face, taking it to his mouth and pressing a kiss on its skin.

“They were being taken care of. I’m just sorry I never got to say goodbye, I guess…” Lance shrugged. “Then shit went down and it wasn’t pretty for a while, until it was. Allura helped a lot because I refused going to therapy, so I get that too. Now I’m fine again. Good old loverboy Lance.” Keith chuckled and kissed Lance’s hand again. “Thanks for telling me all that, Keith. It means a lot.” Keith hummed. “Want to watch another film?” Keith frowned, not sure if he wanted to do that. “I could play and sing for you a bit if you’d like. As long as you don’t fall asleep on me.”

“Actually…” Keith started and hesitated for a second. “There’s something I’d like to try, if it’s okay?” Keith bit his lower lip and Lance frowned slightly. “You have a piano…”

“You know how to play?” Lance said and smiled at Keith. Keith sat down properly.

“I used to. I haven’t touched a piano since father passed away.” He admitted and bit his lower lip again. Lance grabbed his hand and pulled him from the sofa, smiling wide. Keith smiled back, letting Lance lead him to the room where he kept his instruments. Keith sat down by the piano and touched the keys, not pressing any of them.

He tried remembering the basic major chords first. It took him a while, but he managed. Lance drew an acoustic guitar closer and sat down on a small stool near Keith and the piano. Keith moved on to the minor chords. After he was satisfied he tried playing a song. He went for My Immortal, by Evanescence, because that was one of his most sure choices. Lance started singing along to the piano and Keith actually managed to play the whole song.

Keith kept trying to remember song after song, failing sometimes and succeeding other times. He was sure he would manage to remember a few songs by The Paladins, but he didn’t want to explain _that_ to Lance, so he didn’t take his chance. Keith got his phone from his pocket and opened Shiro’s chat.

“I’m going to send an audio to Shiro, so…” Keith said and Lance nodded.

“No singing or humming. Got it.” He smiled and Keith nodded back. He started the audio and proceeded to start playing My Immortal again.

“Suck it, Takashi. Told you I’d still rock a piano with my emo tunes.” Keith said and chuckled as the ended the audio and sent it to Shiro, waiting for a response. “Thanks.” Keith smiled wide at Lance. “I missed playing.”

“You can come over to play whenever you want to.” Lance said and Keith nodded. “What else do you know?”

“I might know some Ray Charles, actually?” Keith said and Lance started clapping. “I knew Heartbreaker and Hit The Road Jack, which one do you prefer?”

“Both! I can sing both!” Lance clapped again. Keith started with Heartbreaker, needing to take some time to remember how to play it and then managed to play Hit The Road Jack nonstop. Lance was beaming at the end of the song and Keith couldn’t stop smiling either. “This is so cool, dude! You’re really good at the piano.”

“Thanks.” Keith felt himself blushing a bit. “I’m kinda rusty, but…” His phone vibrated and he laughed reading Shiro’s messages.

**Shiro: KEITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That’s so neat! I’m so happy for you!!!**  
**Shiro: Wait, this mystery guy has a piano at his place? That’s cool.**  
 **Shiro: I’m proud of you, Keith.**  
 **Shiro: Can I show that to Matt? He’ll be so happy for you.**  
 **Shiro: I’m so happy for you.**  
 **Keith: Yeah, sure thing.**  
 **Keith: Thanks, Shiro. I’m happy too.**  
 **Shiro: Stop texting me in the middle of a date.**

Keith blushed and locked his phone screen before Lance had a chance of accidentally reading Shiro’s text.

“What else have you got, hidden talents guy?” Lance asked, poking Keith’s right side with his index finger and having Keith playfully slap his hand away.

Keith and Lance kept playing the rest of the evening, until it was around midnight and Keith decided it was best for him to go back home, considering Lance had literally only one bed and he didn’t really feel like sleeping in the couch that night. Lance walked Keith until they were both out of the building.

“Thanks for inviting me over. I had a lot of fun.” Keith said and Lance smiled wide at him. “And thanks for hearing me out.”

“No problems. Thanks for sharing your story with me.” Lance held Keith’s hand carefully. “Come back whenever you feel like playing. Or whatever, really.” Keith nodded and used his free hand to ask for a car to pick him up. “I’m sorry Pidge found out you were here today.”

“Don’t worry about that. They’re not telling anyone. I trust them.” Keith said and Lance pulled him a bit closer, wrapping his arms around Keith’s waist.

“I’m going out with Rolo and Nyma tomorrow night. We’ll go clubbing.” Lance smirked. “Maybe I could take on that promise of getting you drunk if you want.” Keith raised an eyebrow and hummed taking one of his hands to Lance’s chin.

“I’ll think about it.” He said and held Lance’s face in place. Lance was definitely looking at Keith’s lips now. Keith could _feel_ Lance’s blue eyes piercing through his lips. “Text me the specifics. Time and place, you know the drill.” Lance nodded, but didn’t move. Keith’s phone vibrated. “Uber’s probably here.” Lance hummed. Keith kissed the tip of Lance’s nose and Lance closed his eyes for a second. “Thanks again.”

“Text me when you’re home.” Lance said, eyes still closed, and let go of Keith, who didn’t answer.

Keith got into the car and watched Lance touch the tip of his own nose, eyes still closed, as the car pulled way and his heart skipped a beat. Lance looked absolutely wrecked, glued to his place, and Keith was the one who had done that. He was meant to text Lance as soon as he got home, but Lance had already texted him, so he first took a while to change Lance’s contact name. If Pidge had figured it out, he should be safe in case he ever let his phone hanging around in the apartment and Shiro saw one of Lance’s texts.

**Sharpshooter <3: sorry if I made u uncomfortable at any point of the day**  
**Sharpshooter <3: thanks again for today**  
**Sharpshooter <3: night, cariño <3**  
**Keith: I just got home. Miss me already, McClain?**  
**Sharpshooter <3: I always do**  
**Keith: Night, Lance. Sleep well. Don’t forget to text me the address and time for tomorrow night.**  
**Sharpshooter <3: I won’t. I’m just gonna record a cover to send u first and then I’ll text u those**  
**Sharpshooter <3: sleep well**

Keith received a selfie of Lance, just on his underwear, cuddling Pulpsy, leg tangled on the bed sheets captioned as “wish it was u” and almost had a heart attack, but most definitely had a boner for staring at that photo for too long. Getting drunk with Lance would probably be a bad idea, but that whole thing was an awful idea. Keith was already in the burning pits of hell, so why not take one more step into the flames?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you enjoyed the chapter! i never know if i used ptbr or spanish words in it so if i did hmu if you need a translation and imma add them here lol
> 
> i made a [playlist for the fic on spotify](https://open.spotify.com/user/playlandi/playlist/2vr6vymACCES9lHyLx2Qf4?si=XlmFxYmISimyOxHSnCKHxA), which i plan on updating as i go. some songs might not make a lot of sense at this point in time, but they're all songs that either are a part of the fic or inspired me in my creative process, so ~
> 
> if you want to reach out to me outside of ao3 you can do it through either [my les mis blog](https://whensunscollide.tumblr.com) or [my personal messy blog](https://marsisnotcreative.tumblr.com). i also have the link to all my other social media there!


	6. What goes on between us no one has to know, this is a private show

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith and Lance go clubbing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello, friends! i hope you week was good! thank you for all the comments <3   
> as you might've realised the fic changed from rated T to rated E..... the only reason is because i wrote (poorly) a blowjob in this chapter, but, yeah... that's,,, all the "smut" we're having in the fic, but anyway..... 
> 
> the name of the chapter comes from rihanna's "please don't stop the music".

Keith woke up at six the next day feeling absolutely exhausted since he didn’t manage to fall asleep until it was four in the morning and birds were starting to sing outside of his window. He wondered if he should go clubbing with Lance considering he had to work the next day, but it hit him. Keith was a twenty two years old man who had just gotten his first phone notice at work, never missed a single day, worked way more than he actually had to. He was definitely going to go clubbing with Lance fucking McClain and his friends that one night.

He got up and got ready to work as fast as he could, skipping breakfast to pack his lunch properly; he could always eat something from the café and get away with it, right? He probably wouldn’t, he was probably going to buy something from the café to eat if he was hungry when he got there, but he _could_ and that was all that mattered really.

The day went by pretty smoothly, but everything was getting on his nerves. For the first time in all of the years Keith had known Kolivan, he had been approached during lunch time and kindly asked to go back home and get some rest. He tried fighting Kolivan, but his boss said it wasn’t a request and Keith knew better than to argue.

Shiro wasn’t home and Keith would’ve worried and texted Shiro to check up on him if he wasn’t so tired. He didn’t have the physical strength to do that, so he just lied down on his bed and fell asleep again almost immediately. Keith woke up at six pm, five hours later because Shiro was desperately telling him he had missed work. He opened his eyes, shushing Shiro.

“No I haven’t. I went, Kolivan sent me back because I couldn’t keep my eyes open.” He admitted and looked at Shiro, shrugging. “And if Kolivan tells you to do something you don’t fight him on it.”

“You scared the shit out of me.” Shiro said and sighed. “I don’t think you’ve ever missed a day of work or called in sick ever since you started at the café.” Keith smiled and gave Shiro a thumbs up, proud of himself. “So yesterday, huh? You played the piano.”

“I played the piano.” Keith repeated Shiro’s words. “And it was really fun.” He admitted.

“Does mystery guy play the piano too?” Shiro asked and Keith sighed. “Okay, no questions, got it. I just don’t get why you can’t tell me about him, that’s all.”

“Shiro.” Keith said and Shiro nodded. “I’m seeing him again tonight. We’ll go clubbing.”

“You? Clubbing?” Shiro laughed loudly. “Now _that’s_ new. This guy is good. Whoever he is, he is good.”

“Or maybe I’m just stupid.” Keith admitted, hating it. Shiro didn’t question him, just patted him on the head and left him alone with his thoughts.

Keith unlocked his phone and checked out all of his unread texts. He decided it would be smart to answer Pidge first since he had left them hanging.

**Pidgeon: look idk whats up with u two and idk if i got it all right or all wrong i just worry ok? like, keef, i know u r sweet and great but keeping u and lance a secret seems v shady, man and i dont like that**  
**Pidgeon: lance is my bro and i wont have u or anyone hurting him again u know so like get your shit straight, keef**  
**Pidgeon: also the thing u said abt shito thinking u hate lonce probs hurt him so u should reassure him that’s not the case id it isn’t the case**  
**Pidgeon: dont fuck this up im rooting for both of u to get your shit together**  
**Pidgeon: for now im keeping my mouth closed abt it but if either one of u fuck up im telling shiro right away**  
**Pidgeon: or worse than that im telling matt**  
**Keith: Hey, Pidge, sorry I didn’t answer before. Today was rough. I get it, you’re protecting your friends and I’m happy to be one of them. I’m sorry you were pulled into this, but maybe you’re reading too much into the whole situation. If anyone’s going to get hurt it is me and I’d still like you not to tell Shiro about it, please.**  
**Keith: If I get hurt it’ll be my own goddamned fault.  
** **Pidgeon: u r one dumb bitch for someone who’s actually smarter than the average human u know that? i hope u do**

Keith opened Lance’s chat, not feeling like answering him, put his headphones on and watched the cover Lance had sent him. Lance was wearing pants in the video, thankfully, and he was in his bedroom with one of his acoustic guitars. He was playing a song Keith didn’t know and later on googled and found out was called Stuck on a Puzzle, by Alex Turner.

“ _I have been searching from the bottom to the top for such a sign as the one I caught when I saw your fingers dimming in the lights, like you're used to being told that you're trouble. And I spent all night stuck on the puzzle._ ” Lance’s voice was soft, but there was a different turn to it. It felt as if he meant what he was singing. It sounded like the time he performed “Blue” acoustic for the first time. It sounded so real and Keith felt like either crying or puking and he didn’t know why.

He spent the rest of the day avoiding his phone completely, just letting Lance know he was definitely going to the club later before he threw his phone under his own pillow.

As Keith started to get ready he could feel every cell of his body telling him that was a bad idea, but did he care? No, he didn’t. He probably should, but he didn’t at that point. Or at least he was managing to pretend he didn’t. He put on his black top that had a crop top shaped solid part covering some of his body and fishnets covering his arms and stomach, his black fake leather pants, black combat boots and a black fake leather jacket with spikes on its shoulders. He looked good. _Very_ good. And he knew it.

The club was packed, so Keith texted Lance letting him know he had arrived and was near the bar and waited. He was leaning on the counter and watching his surroundings. The music was very loud and everyone on the dance floor was either moving as if the beat was a part of their basic biological constitution or making out. The people at the bar were either flirting or looked sad; Keith felt bad for them and almost for himself too.

“Hey, pretty boy.” Someone approached Keith, sliding to his side, hands on their own hips. “Want a drink?”

“I’m actually waiting for someone.” Keith said and went back scanning the room, hoping the person would just leave. They didn’t.

“Well, I’m here and they’re not. So maybe we should make the most of it while we can.” Keith looked at them. They were pretty. Tall, blond, slightly tanned, an incredible smile and muscles that could beat Shiro’s in a body building competition, but were still small enough to actually look good. “So, whatcha say, pretty boy?” Keith sighed.

“No, thanks.” He stared deep into the person’s eyes and they nodded.

“Okay. I’ll be around somewhere if you change your mind.” They left and Keith refrained from rolling his eyes. Flirting wasn’t wrong and they hadn’t pushed or anything, but it still bothered Keith a little. His eyes went back to the dance floor, examining it further for a while more.

“Hey.” Lance’s voice was a whisper very near his left ear and he swallowed. He looked at Lance, putting some more space between them; Lance was grinning. “Missed me?” Keith rolled his eyes and Lance laughed. “Come on, we’re at a separate spot. We can come down to dance later.” Lance grabbed Keith’s hand before he could say anything and guided him through the crowd.

Keith was weak. Holding Lance’s hand did _things_ to him and he hated it, he hated himself for it. He hated that he wasn’t used to that yet even though Lance had been holding his hand ever since the first time they went out together. They walked up some stairs – needing to go past a security guard that glared at Keith, but let him through - and through a darker corridor that had some people making out at. Someone moaned and Keith’s grip on Lance’s hand tightened a bit. He wasn’t the biggest fan of seeing or listening to people making out near him for some reason.

Lance was wearing a light blue sparkly crop top, low waisted black _really_ tight jeans black boots and a black slightly oversized jacket on top. He looked dazzling and Keith didn’t know whether he was the least or most lucky man in the world.

“Hey, Keith!” Rolo greeted him loudly as soon as they got to the private box. Keith smiled at him and let go of Lance’s hand to shake his. “Long time no seen, huh? How are you doing?”

“I’ve been fine. What about you? Hey, Nyma.” Nyma smiled at him and waved with her free hand, so he just nodded. She took another sip of whatever she was drinking, leaning more into Rolo’s side.

“I’m good.” Rolo smiled and adjusted his arm that was around Nyma’s shoulder. “You just got here?” Keith nodded. “Let’s all take a shot! You drink tequila?” Keith frowned for a second, he had never tasted tequila in his twenty three years of life.

“Oh, that’s a great idea!” Lance put his arm around Keith’s shoulder, careful not to hurt himself on the spikes. “Get the tablet!” Nyma handed it to Lance. “See, this thing right here is the best thing ever.” Lance showed it to Keith. “We don’t have to go downstairs to get shit from the bar. We _order_ them from here! Technology, am I right?”

“Are you drunk?” Keith raised one eyebrow and Lance chuckled, shaking his head.

“Waiting for you, princess.” He winked and Keith rolled his eyes, secretly melting at both the nickname and the wink. Lance ordered four shots of their most expensive tequila and Keith could already feel the distance between them. “Done.” He handed the tablet back to Nyma. Keith observed and concluded she was already pretty intoxicated. So was Rolo. Lance led him to the opposite side of the seats.

The private box had a door that separate it from the corridor. It was on the third floor of the establishment. The first floor was the dance floor and the bar, the second floor was where the DJ stayed, the third floor was a bunch of balcony type private boxes, surrounding almost the entire room, apart from right above the DJ,’s spot, all surrounded by very thick glass - probably to stop people from falling, that was painted black on both sides that had other private boxes. Lance’s hand was on Keith’s shoulder, his fingers tracing careful circles around the spikes on Keith’s leather jacket. He waited, letting Keith take in the view, not saying a word. The four shots arrived.

“You know how to do it?” Lance asked, whispering into Keith’s ear. “You take your cup up, down, in the circle and then you drink.” Keith nodded. Lance grabbed their shots.

“No salt and lemon?” Nyma asked, one eyebrow up. Lance shrugged. “You’re monstrous, McClain.”

“Arriba! Abajo! Al centro! Adentro!” Rolo started and they all followed him. Keith didn’t know he had to say those words, so he just followed Lance’s instructions and drank it. It burnt a bit, but it was fine. It tasted weird, unlike anything Keith had ever tasted, and the alcohol was very strong. So strong it was mixed with that new flavour and Keith thought it was weird. But good. “Yeah, you go, Keith!” Keith smiled at Rolo who laughed.

Lance put their cups on the table that was positioned in the middle of the room and rested on the black leather couch they were sitting on. His eyes locked on Keith’s, both his arms on the couch’s backrest. Keith sat back, far enough from Lance to be able to stare at him properly, arms crossed in front of his chest. With the corner of his eyes he could see Nyma whispering something to Rolo and kissing his neck; Rolo smirked and nodded, but Keith focused on Lance. The couple’s interaction was none of his business.

“So, what do you like to drink?” Lance asked, casually. Keith frowned. “I mean: do you prefer bitter drinks or sweet drinks? Are you brave enough to risk a Bloody Mary? That’s what I mean.”

“Oh... I like both sweet and bitter drinks, I guess?” Keith said. “There’s a drink with tonic, right? Maybe I’ll like it? I like tonic.”

“A gin and tonic it is then. Nyma, pass me the tablet, please?” Lance asked and leaned over to get the object that Nyma passed to him. He ordered the drink.

“How much is it? That and the shot.” Keith asked, already kind of regretting having said yes to this. It was probably going to be way out of his budget and he would have to use Shiro’s card. Lance rolled his eyes. “Lance.” He insisted.

“Just let me do this, okay? You never let me pay you anything.” Lance said and Keith took a deep breath. “It’s honestly fine, Keith. I’m wooing you.”

“That’s a lie, you paid for the Uber _twice._ And you can woo me in different ways.” Keith rolled his eyes and Lance grinned. “You’re impossible.” Keith sighed. “Fine. But that’s it.”

“I’m paying the _whole_ bill. Everything everyone consumes is on me tonight.” Lance said and rested against the backrest again. “Let me do this, okay? It’s no big deal and I don’t want you to hold back just because I’m paying.”

“I don’t feel comfortable with that, Lance.” Keith insisted one more time. Lance sighed and grabbed one of Keith’s hands, holding it in between his own.

“Just for tonight, don’t worry about that, please? You know it’s not a big deal for me. Next time we go out you can pay the entire bill yourself if you want to, but let me do this tonight. Please.” Lance caressed Keith’s hand with his fingers. They were interrupted by a guy bringing two drinks. The guy handed Keith his gin and tonic and Lance a Piña Colada. “Wanna try it?” Keith hummed and accepted. He kind of liked. But he liked his better. He took a sip of his drink and nodded.

“Just for tonight. And I’m paying next time.” To be completely honest, the only reason he had accepted it was because of the fact that meant they would go out again. That promise was enough to make Keith agree to almost anything. He was too far deep in whatever the hell they had and he knew he would end up getting hurt when Lance finally found someone or when he was spotted hooking up with some other fan again, but Keith no longer could say no to all that. He couldn’t say no to having _that_ chance with Lance. And if he was reading the signs right, maybe he did have that chance with Lance.

Keith started talking to Rolo, at first, since he seemed to be less intoxicated than Nyma was. The four of them started discussing the fact that the club was playing nothing but old songs and that that was actually really cool because it meant they actually knew all of the songs that were playing.

All it took was Keith to look away for a second for Nyma and Rolo to start kissing and another second for them to be gone in the other. Keith didn’t question. He was halfway through his gin and tonic when he started feeling his lips go slightly numb. He couldn’t really remember what it was like to get drunk that one time, but he figured maybe he was starting to. He looked at Lance and found the other man staring at him; Keith blushed a bit and took another sip of his drink.

“You should take it slow.” Lance chuckled and got himself closer to Keith, offering another sip of his own drink, against his own advice. Keith took it. “You’re blushing a bit.” Lance touched Keith’s cheek lightly and smirked. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine. My lips are kind of numb?” Keith frowned and Lance chuckled again, touching Keith’s lips.

“How about we go dancing a little and then we come back and finish our drinks?” Lance took Keith’s cup from his hand before he could protest and made Keith stand up, which took him off balance for a bit. Lance held him by the waist. “Wow, careful, princess.” Keith rolled his eyes.

“Don’t call me that.” Keith took Lance’s hands off his waist and Lance chuckled again, grabbing Keith’s hands again and guiding him downstairs.

The music was very loud and the dance floor was full. Which meant Keith and Lance had to dance very close to each other. Or at least that’s what it seemed like. Maybe they could put some space between them, but Keith was surely not complaining.

It was weird. Keith wasn’t very good at that, he didn’t think. Lance probably noticed he was slightly uncomfortable, so he touched Keith’s waist lightly and looked at him. Keith nodded and Lance’s grip tightened on his waist, guiding it so it was moving smoothly with the song. Once Keith managed to mimic those movements on his own – which was way easier than he had anticipated, he just needed some confidence –, Lance’s hands left him and Lance started moving too.

The two of them danced to three songs completely free. It was actually nice. Keith watched Lance moving and tried mimicking some of his moves; Lance realised and started trying to teach him a few. It was fun. Keith looked up to Lance’s face and Lance was smiling widely and that made his heart skip a beat, so he smiled too. As the forth song started playing, Lance moved quickly so he could get closer to Keith, his mouth very near Keith’s ear.

“You look amazing.” He said as low as possible, which was loud because of the music, but not loud enough to hurt Keith’s ear. Lance wrapped his arms around Keith’s neck. “You know, when I invited you I wasn’t sure you would say yes... But I’m glad you did.” His hands moved to Keith’s arms, very slowly. “You look _really_ good tonight, Keith.” He bit at Keith’s earlobe gently and Keith gasped. Lance stopped. “Is this okay?” Was it? Keith wanted Lance, of course he did, but was that okay? What if someone saw them? What if it blew up as a scandal? But what if that was his only shot at getting with Lance? Even if Lance was only trying to get into his pants, could he say no? Did he had it in him to say no despite really wanting that? Keith nodded and Lance giggled. “Nice.” Lance started moving his hands again, very carefully, stopping at the end of Keith’s back. He kissed Keith’s neck lightly. “You’re a good dancer.”

“You’re a bad liar.” Keith chuckled and Lance did so too against his neck, giving him goosebumps. Keith wrapped his arms around Lance’s neck and Lance laughed again. “Lance...” Keith whispered. Lance couldn’t hear him through the noise, but he felt Keith’s throat vibrating, so he kissed it open mouthed. Keith’s fists turned into two balls and he swallowed hard; Lance giggled and got his head away from Keith’s neck so he could look at him.

Lance smiled at Keith and it wasn’t in any way sexual or lustful. If anything it was... Sweet? Keith felt himself blush harder and Lance kissed the tip of his nose. Keith felt like he was going to explode, so he let go of Lance. Lance let go of him too, but only to turn around and start dancing with his back to Keith. Rihanna’s Please Don’t Stop The Music was blasting on the speakers and Lance was dancing in an incredibly sensual way to that old song. He reached back and pulled Keith close to him, making Keith hold his waist. Keith followed, moving against Lance, trying not to absolutely freak out. He had gotten used to the continuous flirting and with spending time with Lance, but having him grind his ass against Keith’s crotch? That was... Very new.

Keith wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or if he had gone completely insane, but he started giving in to those sensations. He had felt them before, sure. Every time Lance held him closer his heartbeat would race, every time Lance had kissed the top of his head he had felt like he was going to melt away, but they were stronger in the situation he was n. And Lance’s moves weren’t just sweet now, they had something different to them. Lust. They were lustful; lascivious.

Lance turned his face to smirk at Keith and Keith frowned slightly. Two could play that game. And if he went too far he was sure Lance would stop him, right? So he grinded against Lance’s ass a bit harder, making sure Lance felt his erection; Lance’s smirk turned into a full on grin. Keith started kissing Lance’s neck and nibbling lightly at it. He felt Lance shudder in front of him and smiled victoriously; so it wasn’t just Lance who could make Keith feel things, Keith could make Lance feel them too. That realisation hit Keith hard and stimulated him to continue, so he took his mouth do Lance’s earlobe and bit at it lightly. Lance’s hand flew right to Keith’s hair and pulled at it with little to no gentleness. Keith looked at Lance, his head resting on Keith’s shoulder, eyes closed and mouth hanging open; it was a beautiful sight. Keith couldn’t take it anymore.

“Wanna go somewhere a bit more private?” He asked and bit Lance’s earlobe again. Lance bit his lower lip for an instant before grinning and opening his eyes.

“I thought you’d never ask.” Despite being apparently skinny, Lance was strong. He got away from Keith’s grasp and pulled Keith by the hand all the way back to Lance’s private box. Keith tried so hard not to just let go of himself and push Lance into the closest wall and kiss him hard; he managed, but just barely.

As soon as they got to the box, Lance pushed Keith onto the sofa and sat on his lap, facing him. He moved his hips, making their erections touch and that made Keith growl. Lance smiled, genuinely, and caressed Keith’s face gently, then put his hand on Keith’s hair, running his fingers through it until the back of Keith’s neck, when he pulled not so gently. Keith hissed instinctively, but rolled his hip up to meet Lance’s, making Lance gasp.

Lance got his face inches from Keith’s and Keith closed his eyes. Lance rubbed their noses together and kissed Keith’s cheek. He was making things so hard for Keith, almost as if all that meant something. He kissed his way to Keith’s neck and started nibbling at the skin between Keith’s neck and shoulder, pushing Keith’s jacket so it fell a bit from his shoulders. Keith let him have his way and took his hands to Lance’s ass, squeezing it lightly. Lance sighed against Keith’s skin and Keith’s moan was too low to be heard. Keith was going to go crazy, but who the hell cared? He most certainly didn’t. Not at that point; alcohol running through his veins, Lance fucking McClain on his lap, slowly tearing him to pieces.

Lance pulled Keith’s hair a bit harder, pushed Keith’s top out of his way just slightly and sucked at a spot that Keith’s top would later cover, on Keith’s left side, between his shoulder and chest, probably leaving a hickey. Keith didn’t mind at all. He was going to secretly treasure that mark for as long as it lasted. Lance stopped for a second and Keith didn’t move, a bit confused. Lance kissed the place where he likely had left the mark gently and moved back to Keith’s neck, kissing it open mouthed. Trailing his way to Keith’s lips. Keith’s grip on Lance’s ass increasing as Lance got closer to his lips. Lance stopped way too close to Keith’s lips and Keith whined. Lance chuckled lightly.

“You’re drunk.” Lance pointed out. Keith closed his eyes, still not letting go of Lance’s ass.

“Tipsy.” Keith answered and kissed Lance’s cheek. “Wasn’t that the goal?”

“I feel like I’m taking advantage of you.” Lance answered and Keith opened his eyes, only to see a frowning Lance with his eyes closed on top of him. Keith took a deep breath and kissed the tip of Lance’s nose, then his cheek, moving all the way to Lance’s neck, nibbling at it lightly and feeling the vibrations of Lance’s first moan. Keith chuckled and Lance rolled his hips against Keith’s. Keith bit a tad harder on the spot between Lance’s neck and shoulder and that made Lance get even closer to Keith.

“You like that?” Keith asked. Lance nodded and Keith bit again, making Lance shudder. Keith was tempted to mark Lance back, but Lance had a public life, so maybe he shouldn’t. “Can I...” he started and hesitated before continuing. “Can I give you hickeys or…”

“Oh, feel free.” Lance’s voice was back to its normal giddiness. Keith blinked a few times when he realised it and wondered why he hadn’t realised the changes earlier. When had Lance’s voice changed? “You can do whatever you want to.”

“That’s a lot to offer someone, loverboy.” Keith half joked. Lance pulled Keith’s hair to get him a bit far so he could stare right into Keith’s eyes. They stared at each other for a while, God knows for how long, before Lance opened his mouth again to speak.

“You can do whatever you want to.” He repeated himself and rolled his hip again, a bit harder, making Keith instinctively close his eyes and moan a bit louder. Lance grinned. “Such a pretty face, mullet. Such pretty reactions to me too.”

“Shut up.” Keith growled and opened his eyes. “Let’s get that smug grin off your face, shall we?” Keith smirked and pulled Lance’s face to his, almost closing the space between their lips, but going for his neck instead. If he was honest, he wasn’t sure if he would be able to kiss Lance and live to tell. He would most likely die on spot, right there, and Lance would be considered guilty of homicide.

Besides, Keith knew kissing Lance was a very dumb idea. Very, very dumb. Even dumber than... whatever it was they were doing. Secretly going out with Lance once? Dumb. Secretly going out with Lance four times? Dumber. Making out hard with Lance? Straight up stupidity. Changing their positions on the couch and kneeling in front of Lance, running his hands through Lance’s thighs when Lance still had his pants on? So stupid. Slowly opening up Lance’s zipper while kissing Lance’s stomach and scratching Lance’s stomach with his free hand? So, so dumb. Letting Lance’s penis out of his underwear and running his hands up and down the shaft before kissing its head and kitten licking it? Keith knew it was the dumbest thing so far.

As he worked hard on his blowjob, Lance’s hand on his hair, he looked up and saw Lance’s face. If only he could take a photo of him and save it forever, but his own memory would have to do. Not that he could ever forget Lance looking like such a wreck because of him. His eyes closed, mouth hanging open, a small frown on his face. Keith hummed and Lance had a small spasm, thrusting a bit further into Keith’s mouth, putting one of his own hands on Keith’s hair and biting his other. Keith sucked hard and tried getting all of Lance inside of his mouth, careful not to gag. Once he managed he did so again and again, letting Lance’s entire dick in and out of his mouth, head touching the back of his throat. Lance’s grip on his hair was tighter, but he didn’t conduct Keith’s movements at all, he just let Keith do as he pleased. Until Lance pulled Keiths hair, a warning that he was too close, Keith kept up doing what he was doing and Lance came in Keith’s mouth. He swallowed as much as he could, but some of Lance’s semen got away from him and dripped down his chin. Keith took Lance’s dick from his mouth and looked up at Lance, who was looking down, dumbfounded, caught the remaining drops from his chin with his thumb and licked it up. He could see Lance swallowing hard.

He sat down besides Lance and waited while Lance put his dick into his underwear and pants again and did his zipper up. Lance looked at Keith, expressionless for a second.

“My turn.” He then said. Keith smiled gently, but Lance didn’t move.

“It’s okay. I’m good.” Keith leaned to get his gin and tonic from the table and chug the rest of it down at once. Lance opened his mouth to speak, but Keith stopped him. “Honestly, Lance. I’m good. Don’t worry.” Lance narrowed his eyes for a second, but nodded. “So, tell me about your week.” Keith tried diverting the subject from anything sexual altogether. Lance clearly pretended to bite the bait, but then he started to actually get excited as he told Keith about how they were writing a new song and he was super excited about it because he was putting a lot of himself in it, then he moved to a funny story about an old lady who thought he was her grandson and he felt so bad that he actually followed her around the whole day, helping her with her groceries and keeping her company until she realised he wasn’t her grandson, but kept him close anyways because he was a ‘sweet young man’.

Keith let him talk. He really needed Lance to, so he could calm himself down and refrain from jumping on top of Lance again and doing whatever. That was dumb and Keith was tipsy, sure, but he still had complete control over himself and he knew he shouldn’t let himself get too involved. Or more involved. This thing with Lance wouldn’t last. Couldn’t last. Lance didn’t have any special interest in Keith, Keith knew that. He had to remind himself of that. Lust? Maybe. But that was probably all. So he wouldn’t get more involved. Or at least he would try. Besides, they only met once in a while, even though they talked almost every single day through text and even facetimed few times and Lance knew so much about Keith already; surely way more than anyone else apart from Shiro. Keith knew he was too far gone, but he wouldn’t admit that to himself or to anyone.

As Lance talked and changed subjects as quickly as always, Keith made a few comments so Lance wouldn’t feel like Keith wasn’t paying attention. But he couldn’t stop wondering what if he let Lance touch him too. What if he had kissed Lance or if Lance had kissed him? And how would things be between them after Keith had had Lance’s dick inside his mouth? So many questions that would be left unanswered, some that Keith would have to wait to have an answer.

They spent the next few hours chatting. No more alcohol, no more dancing, no more making out. Just regular chatting. At the club. Which was not regular at all. But Keith was comfortable like that – except for the few inches between them that felt like the Grand Canyon – and Lance seemed to be too. Maybe the blowjob had been a mistake. Because if you had someone’s dick in your mouth why not, like, hold hands every second they could? Blowjobs were supposed to be way more intimate than hand holding, right? But Keith let the space untouched; it was better that way. He would need to build some walls or else he would get wrecked. And severely heartbroken, just like he had told Pidge he probably would.

“It’s getting late, I should probably go.” Keith said after a longer pause. Lance blinked a few times. “I told Shiro I would be back home.” That was a lie.

“You didn’t tell him you were out clubbing?” Lance asked, running his hands through his own hair. Keith shook his head, lying again. “Oh... I see... I guess you should, then... Get going.” Keith nodded and stood up. Lance followed him.

“You don’t have to...” Lance shook his head and smiled.

“Let me.” He said. Keith nodded. They walked together, silently, not touching, until they were both outside the club. Lance told the security guard he would go back inside and the guard gave him a pass so he could go back in. “Did you have fun?” Keith nodded and Lance hummed. “Thanks... For coming and... You know...”

“Sure.” Keith got his phone from his pocket and asked for an Uber. “Thanks for inviting me.”

“Yeah. Anytime.” Lance looked down and put his hands into his own pockets. “Let me know when you get home?” He looked back at Keith and saw him nod while he hummed. “Thanks.” They waited for Keith’s Uber in silence. When the car arrived Lance grabbed Keith’s hand and Keith froze in place, looking at Lance while he got closer to Keith’s face. Oh no. Keith moved fast and turned his face, so Lance kissed Keith's cheek and rest his forehead against Keith’s face. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Keith put one arm around Lance and caressed his head lightly. “‘Night, Lance. Let me know when you’re home safe too, okay?” Lance nodded and Keith let go, entering the car and not looking back. He had been so stupid. The Uber driver must have realised Keith was in a shitty mood because they didn’t say a single thing through the entire ride, until they dropped Keith off.

“It’s going to be fine.” They said before Keith left the car. “Sometimes love doesn’t seem enough, but if you truly love each other everything turns out fine.”

“We... We’re not...” Keith sighed. “Thanks. It’s more complicated than that, but... Thanks.” The driver nodded. Keith left the car and walked up to his flat, trying not to wake Shiro up.

**Keith: I’m home. Night, Lance. Take care.**

He texted Lance and got himself ready to bed. Keith couldn’t get Lance’s face out of his head, which was pretty common for him. But knowing he had actively and _purposefully_ denied a kiss from Lance would haunt him for a very long time. It was better that way, though. He had allowed himself too much into that whole situation and it was time for him to get his shit together and either cut ties with Lance or stop falling for him. Besides, not being able to tell Shiro about it was enough of a red flag for him and he should never had let it be more than that first date – or whatever that was.

Keith hugged Hippo, his beloved stuffed hippo, really tightly and fell asleep feeling a deep sadness, one hadn’t felt in quite a while, take over his entire body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you liked the chapter :D writing anything sex related is very uncomfortable and awkward for me but lçdsfjalfdjsdjsd yeah 
> 
> i made a [playlist for the fic on spotify](https://open.spotify.com/user/playlandi/playlist/2vr6vymACCES9lHyLx2Qf4?si=XlmFxYmISimyOxHSnCKHxA), which i plan on updating as i go. some songs might not make a lot of sense at this point in time, but they're all songs that either are a part of the fic or inspired me in my creative process, so ~
> 
> if you want to reach out to me outside of ao3 you can do it through either [my les mis blog](https://whensunscollide.tumblr.com) or [my personal messy blog](https://marsisnotcreative.tumblr.com). i also have the link to all my other social media there!


	7. The world is a windmill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith has to deal with feelings and secrets and tries to manage some distance between him and Lance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hellon beautiful people! this chapter is slightly shorter and is more plot focused in the sense of not having A Lot tm of klance. we do get some peith (???) (pidge and keith lol) being bffs and interacting, which is coolio lkdslkal~çdks  
> in case you wanna consider buying me a metaphorical coffee: ko-fi.com/playlandi
> 
> thank u for all the lovely comments and for the kudos, i'm glad you're enjoying the fic!!!! <3 it's really cool to see that something i wrote is actually being enjoyed ldalfkdslkd ><  
> the title of this chapter is from the song "o mundo é um moinho", by a brazilian artist called Cartola. he was AMAZING and i love his songs a lot.  
> i hope yall enjoy it. sorry for posting this on saturday morning, not friday night, i've had a rough week.

Avoiding Lance was way harder than Keith thought it would be. At first it had been relatively easy. Lance hadn’t really texted Keith as much as he used to and Keith wondered if he had fucked up _that_ monumentally with the blowjob or if it was just a coincidence. Shiro was at either Lance’s or Matt’s constantly, so maybe Lance was just working a lot.

They didn’t facetime once in three whole weeks and Lance started sending Keith less photos of himself. Their texting had been resumed to actual texting, no more audios, no videos and almost no photos at all. After that time, Lance started picking up his original pace again. It started with him sending an audio to Keith asking about something he had composed – and Keith was physically shaking because of that. _Lance_ had asked _him_ about a composition for _The Paladins_. That was too surreal. More surreal than Keith having had Lance’s dick in his mouth.

But Lance didn’t suggest them seeing each other again. Lance didn’t jokingly flirted with Keith through texting. And Keith was back to his previous self, not sending Lance photos, just answering regularly, like he answered Pidge or Hunk or anyone else.

While he was out doing groceries, Keith caught a glimpse of a gossip magazine that was talking about how weird it was that Lance hadn’t been spotted making out with anyone in more than two months and Keith felt sick. That was good. It meant no one knew about what had happened at the club, but, at the same time, it made him remember Lance wasn’t just Lance; his friend, the guy he was kind of going out - or not - with. He was lover boy Lance McClain. A flirt, a womaniser, constantly on the move.

The hardest part had been waiting for the hickey Lance left on his skin to vanish. That made Keith remember what had happened every time he undressed, every time he looked at his bare chest in the mirror. And when the mark was gone, Keith missed it dearly. It was proof of what had happened and even though it made Keith felt awful because he knew it had been a mistake, it was like a dream come true, so he had cherished that mark for as long as he could, even though it hurt him a bit to look at it.

When Shiro told Keith they were going to perform at an Unplugged session with very few people and that he had gotten Keith ticket for it, Keith was terrified. As far as Keith knew, whenever they had a concert, Lance would hook up with a fan that went backstage.  He hadn't questioned Lance about it ever since they had hung out for the first time and h didn't plan on questioning him about it any time at all. That was just how things worked. And he didn’t want to be around for that.

So he counted the days, very anxious, very stressed. He figured Lance already knew about it, but he let him know two weeks prior.

 **Keith: Shiro got me a pass for the Unplugged.  
Keith: So I’ll be there to watch you.  
****Sharpshooter <3: !!!! nice **  
**Sharpshooter <3: I’ll do my best for you**  
 **Keith: You should do your best for your fans.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: yeah yeah I always do**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: but the fans r always there and u r not ;)**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: I’m just messing with u, mullet head**  
 **Keith: I’m rolling my eyes at you, just so you know.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: more of the same, I’m used to that by now lol**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: r u free tonight? we could facetime**  
 **Keith: I have to go to bed early, sorry.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: no problems, dude**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: anyway, how’s your week going?**

Keith felt a bit bad for saying no to Lance’s offer, but he didn’t think he was ready for it yet. He needed some time to psych himself up to meet Lance in such a small space and then probably having to publicly interact with him backstage. He was stressed beyond belief, which made him work twice as hard at the Blade of Marmora and stress clean the apartment seven times on the span of fourteen days.

If Shiro noticed, and he probably did, he didn’t say anything. He just cooked Keith dishes he knew Keith really liked and tried distracting Keith whenever they were home together. Shiro was a great brother, Keith was lucky to have him around.

Shiro didn’t ask about Keith’s dates anymore – or rather about the lack of them – and Keith was thankful for that. He _really_ didn’t want to talk about any of it. With anyone. Pidge tried asking Keith if he was fine once, but Keith sent them an audio in response asking them to please drop the subject and never ever mention it again; that he was fine and everything was great, but he didn’t want to talk about it and he didn’t want to think about it and he didn’t want anyone else to know about it or to worry about it.

In the meantime he had to figure out how to make his interaction with Lance seem as natural as he possibly could, so no one would suspect a thing. Maybe he could get Shiro and Matt alone at some room after the concert and that would solve all his problems, since they couldn’t keep their hands to themselves when they were alone in a small place together. Maybe he could ask Pidge for help, but he doubted they would want to be involved in his lies and slander. He would have to discuss that with Lance, but he didn’t want to talk to Lance a lot.

He couldn’t stop thinking about how he had denied Lance that one kiss. Or about how much he had wanted to kiss Lance. Or about how much he missed seeing Lance, touching Lance, talking to Lance. That was bad, it was really bad. He needed to get over Lance and he needed to do that quickly, before his heart broke even more.

What the hell had he been thinking anyway? Getting involved with Lance like that… He should’ve known it would end up in a painful way. So it was better for him to end that before Lance did. Because maybe, just maybe, he had started actually developing feelings for Lance. It was a, according to himself, very faint possibility, but a possibility anyway. And he couldn’t let that be true. Because he was Keith and Lance was Lance McClain.

In the meantime, Pidge had threatened Keith, telling him they needed to hang out because it was absolutely unacceptable for them to have grown so close so fast and never hang out. So Keith agreed to go to Pidge’s and play video games on his free day.

“Keefer!” Pidge smiled as they opened the door to Keith, who smiled back. “Come on in! Do you want water or whatever?”

“No, thanks. I’m good.” Keith said and Pidge smiled, taking Keith straight to their room. Their room was a mess and Keith hadn’t expected anything different.

“What do you want to play? I have the Nintendo 64, a Wii and a Playstation 3.” Pidge sat down on their bed and motioned for Keith to site beside them.

“Do you have Mario Kart?” Keith asked and Pidge grinned maniacally, standing up to set up the N64.

They spent hours playing. Pidge was actually very good at that game and Keith love to them a few times, but at the end of the day, Keith was still a known champion in racing games, so he ended up beating Pidge more times than losing to them. They battled in Pokemon stadium after a while and then Pidge set up the Playstation so they could play Guitar Hero Encore: Rock the 80’s.

“Do you want to talk about it now?” Pidge asked, adjusting their glasses and not looking away from the screen. Keith sighed.

“Not really.” He said and Pidge groaned, missing a streak.

“Come on, I doubt you’ve talked to anyone about it.” Pidge groaned louder. “Fucking hell!” They said after missing _another_ streak. “Shiro’s been worried about you. He told Matt, who told me, ‘cause we’re buddies and they know we’re buddies.”

“There’s nothing to talk about. I’m just stressing over the Unplugged session, that’s all. ‘Cause we’re going to have to interact and…” Keith sighed. “I don’t want to talk about it, Pidgeon.” They both felt silent for a while, but Pidge spoke up a song and a half later.

“You know you’re hurting him, right?” They said and Keith froze, missing a bunch of notes. Pidge paused the game and looked at Keith. “He talked to me about it. Don’t be mad at him, okay? It’s just… Lance was in a very shitty place recently, but that’s his thing to talk about, but you were actually helping a lot, you know? That’s also his thing to say and I’m being a shit friend in order to be a good friend.” They frowned slightly, Keith was looking down. “You’re hurting him, Keith.”

“Well, he’s not the only one hurting, Pidge. Have you considered that?” Keith raised his voice a bit.

“Yes I have! That’s why I’m telling you that you can talk to me, dumbass.” Pidge raised their voice as well and Keith looked at them. “I said I was going to tell Matt as soon as one of you got hurt, but I didn’t. Because I care. But I can’t deal with seeing you two hurting for whatever stupid reason.”

“I didn’t mean to hurt him.” Keith confessed, going back to his normal tone. “Fuck, Pidge…” Pidge sighed. “I’m scared.” Admitting that out loud was hard, but he had to at some point.

“Don’t be.” Pidge sighed and hugged Keith. “Talk to Lance, okay? Trust him. And don’t be mad at him.” They said snuggling closer to Keith, who hugged them back. Pidge was great at cuddling, Keith had learnt. “Wanna talk about what happened?” Keith shook his head and Pidge hummed. “Okay. I’m here if you change your mind, though.”

“Thanks, goblin.” Keith said and Pidge punched his back, not really holding back. “Ouch, Pidge.”

“You deserved it.” They said, letting go of Keith, who laughed and massaged the spot lightly. “Now back to the game so I can keep kicking your ass, Keefer.”

They continued playing the game for a few hours more and Keith allowed himself not to think about anything for a while, but Lance kept popping into his head, so he decided to take in Pidge’s offer.

“What did he tell you?” Keith asked, still looking at the screen. “You said you talked to him, right? What did he tell you?”

“I’m not telling you that.” Pidge answered and Keith missed his streak. “You have to talk to _Lance_ about it.” Pidge shrugged. “Ha! Suck it, Kogane!” They shouted after the song was over. “How are you going to act after the Unplugged?”

“I have no idea… I need to talk to Lance about that.” Keith said and took a deep breath. “I’ll do that later this week or something.” Pidge hummed. “Do you have another Guitar Hero?”

“I have all of them, dude.” Pidge smiled and adjusted their glasses.

They changed the game and the two of them dropped the subject. At the end of the day, Pidge had wrecked Keith in the Guitar Hero games, but Keith went back home feeling happy. It had been a good day, even though he had talked about thing he didn’t necessarily want to and heard things he didn’t like.

Pidge had told him he was hurting Lance and that made Keith feel really bad. Even worse because he didn't understand how he had hurt Lance. So Keith decided to text Lance and ask him if he was up for facetiming. Lance said he was just about to shower, but he would let Keith know when he was free.

Keith decided to grab something to eat while he waited, so he made himself a fruit salad with apples, bananas, mangoes and the remaining of a pineapple Shiro had ate almost entirely by himself. When Lance called him, he was halfway done with his food. He walked to his room, closed the door and put one side of his earphones on, so he could make sure he wasn’t talking too loudly and Shiro wouldn’t hear him.

“Hey.” Keith sat down by his bed and Lance smiled faintly o the other side of the screen.

“ _Hey, dude…_ ” He answered, put his phone somewhere, so he didn’t have to keep holding it up, and hugged his knees to his chest.

“You look tired.” Keith pointed out and took a spoon full of fruit to his mouth. Lance nodded.

“ _I didn’t sleep much. I was finishing a song we’re performing at the Unplugged for the first time._ ” He answered and Keith hummed in response. “ _So… You wanted to talk?_ ”

“Yeah, yeah…” Keith ate a bit more and Lance rest his face between his knees. “We’re going to see each other there.”

“ _Yeah. We are._ ” Lance answered and Keith could barely hear him.

“And we’ll have to interact.” Keith continued and Lance nodded.

“ _I actually have a plan for that?_ ” He said and Keith raised an eyebrow. Lance chuckled. “ _I figured you probably wouldn’t want to come up with yet another lie, so I thought we didn’t have to? I know you hate lying to Shiro…_ ” Lance’s tone was low and Keith nodded, encouraging him to continue. “ _We don’t have to tell people anything, we can just interact a bit, normal stuff, you know? No touching or anything, just… A hello, a casual conversation about whatever for a while, then I can go be with the fans and if anyone asks about it we can tell them we’ve talked a couple of times online. Which is true._ ”

“What if they question about how long we’ve been talking for?” Keith asked. It was clear that Lance had thought a lot about that plan.

“ _We don’t have to give anyone specific information. We can tell them we’re not really sure. I texted you first and you answered and we started texting occasionally. Still not a lie._ ” Lance raised his head a bit to smile for the camera. “ _I don’t think anyone will question us a lot, though._ ”

“And when the fans leave?” Keith took the last spoon of fruit to his mouth and Lance chuckled.

“ _I’ll try not leaving either Pidge’s or Hunk’s side._ ” Lance explained. “ _Hunk doesn’t know anything, before you worry about it. But he’s my best buddy, so it’s actually pretty normal for me to spend post concerts near him._ ”

“You thought about this a lot, didn’t you?” Keith’s voice was low and Lance nodded, hiding his mouth behind his knees again. Keith hummed. “Sounds like a plan.”

“ _I’m glad you liked it. I’m not very comfortable lying either, so this way we can act pretty normal and not have anyone thinking it’s suspicious. And we won’t be lying._ ” Lance’s voice was even lower and Keith couldn’t stop thinking about Pidge telling him he was hurting Lance.

“I was over at Pidge’s today.” Keith said and Lance hummed. That was weird. Lance was uncharacteristically quiet. “Are you okay?” Lance’s eyes widened for a second, but then he just smiled.

“ _Tired._ ” Lance lied. Keith knew Lance was lying. “ _Are you?_ ”

“Tired too.” Keith said and Lance nodded, chuckling lightly.

“ _Is there anything else you’d like to discuss?_ ” Lance asked and Keith frowned, shaking his head. “ _Okay…_ ”

“Are you really okay?” Keith insisted, not quite knowing how to approach the subject. Lance sighed and smiled at him.

“ _I don’t really want to talk about it? Sorry._ ” Lance’s answer confirmed what Pidge had told Keith: he’d hurt Lance. He didn’t know how or why, but he’d hurt Lance. “ _I just need to rest. I’ll be fine in no time, you’ll see. Don’t worry._ ” Lance smiled wider. “ _I think I need to sleep a bit now, though._ ” Keith hummed. “ _See ya, dude._ ”

“See you.” Keith said and Lance didn’t wait before hanging up.

Keith lied down on his bed and closed his eyes for a while.

That had been the weirdest conversation he’d had with Lance yet and he really didn’t like it. It felt awful to see Lance looking like that and know he had somehow something to do with that. Keith felt his phone vibrate and read Lance’s text.

 **Sharpshooter <3: I recorded this a while ago, it’s a br song I really like**  
**Sharpshooter <3: and I realised I never sent u any of the br songs I had promised when we hung out the first time, so here it is**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: it’s called o mundo é um moinho and it’s by Cartola**

Lance sent him a video. Keith smiled to himself; if Lance was back sending him videos it meant they were still kind of fine, right?

Keith watched the video at least three times in a row. Lance looked sad, but his voice sounded truthful to whatever he was singing. Keith had no idea what the song was about, but he imagined it was probably a sad song, considering everything. He took a deep breath and watched it a fourth time before asking Lance what the song was about. Lance replied fairly quickly, explaining there were lots of rumours surrounding it, but what everyone believed was that Cartola, the singer, had written the song to his daughter, who had decided to live as a prostitute and the song was about how that life would treat her poorly and make her suffer and how scared he was for her.

Lance said his favourite part of the song was the third one and sent Keith the literal translation of it.

**Sharpshooter <3: “hear me out, love, pay close attention: the world is a windmill. it’ll crush your petty dreams and turn illusions to dust.” idk, I feel that in a personal level, I guess**

Keith didn’t know how to answer that, so he just sent Lance a frowning face and locked his phone screen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope yall enjoyed the chapter!!!! if you find any grammar or w/e mistakes hmu, i've been editing the fic (cause i was posting it unbetaed and unedited lol), sooo ~
> 
> i made a [playlist for the fic on spotify](https://open.spotify.com/user/playlandi/playlist/2vr6vymACCES9lHyLx2Qf4?si=XlmFxYmISimyOxHSnCKHxA), which i plan on updating as i go. some songs might not make a lot of sense at this point in time, but they're all songs that either are a part of the fic or inspired me in my creative process, so ~
> 
> if you want to reach out to me outside of ao3 you can do it through either [my les mis blog](https://whensunscollide.tumblr.com) or [my personal messy blog](https://marsisnotcreative.tumblr.com). i also have the link to all my other social media there!
> 
> and, once again, if you wanna consider buying me a metaphorical coffee to help me out: ko-fi.com/playlandi <3 thanks bbs


	8. Been wondering if our heart's still open and if so I wanna know what time it shuts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith goes to a private The Paladins' concert.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyoo, thanks for all the comments and kudos <3 they're all really appreciated!  
> i'm sorry i've been posting on saturday morning and not friday nights, but life's been hectic so i've been sleeping 12+ hours every friday since i get home and literally pass out from exhaustion ha haha........ anyway
> 
> title of the chapter from "do i wanna know", by arctic monkeys

Shiro left the flat first in the morning, because he had to get ready with the band. Keith left later, feeling very anxious. He honestly felt like vomiting and that was the worst he had felt in a long time.

He was anxious because he was going to watch The Paladins live and up close for the first time ever since he’d became friends with them and he had to remind himself they were now his friends, not the unattainable kind of famous people they once were. Keith _really_ didn’t want anyone else knowing he was a fan of the band. Matt knew, Shiro – obviously – knew, Pidge knew. He hoped Hunk didn’t know and he would give anything for Lance to never ever find that out. Especially considering the role Lance had played during Keith’s early years.

The Paladins had helped him through very hard times and he was sure they would feel humbled to know that, but it was definitely embarrassing to admit it. He didn’t want them to think any less of him or to think he’d only approached them because of the band. It’s not like Keith had any choice on the matter either, since his brother was now part of the band. Even if he hated them he would have to at least maintain a healthy relationship with them because of Shiro.

Keith took his time deciding what to wear. He ended up choosing the same pair of jeans he wore when he went to the arcade with Lance, a pair of high top red Converses, a black galaxy, short sleeved, button up shirt and an oversized grey denim jacket with a bunch of patches – a gay flag, some spaceships, stars, alien faces and a circle with the words “I’m not interested in being polite or heterosexual” written in it – and a red beanie.

The way to where the concert was going to be was stressful and his Uber driver insisted in chatting to Keith about how homosexuality was a bad thing and he was such a handsome man who should get himself a nice girl, get married, have kids and all that jazz. Keith managed not to punch the guy square on the jaw thanks to his anxiety levels being very, very high.

He got to the place a bit earlier, but there were people inside already, so he picked a spot to sit down where he could see both Lance and Shiro from up close. Keith knew he probably shouldn’t be that physically close to Lance in a Paladins intimate concert, but he had to act normal and he really wanted to be as near Shiro as possible. Keith’s phone vibrated and he unlocked it, expecting a text from Shiro, but it was Pidge’s.

 **Pidgeon: u sly sly motherfucker i SEE u keefer i SEE u**  
**Pidgeon: try dividing your attention between shiro and i too**  
**Pidgeon: eyes emoji eyes emoji**  
**Keith: Shouldn’t you be focusing or something?**  
**Pidgeon:** **INTENSE EYES EMOJI**  
**Keith: Fuck off, goblin.**  
**Pidgeon: evaporate, tall person**

Keith got a message from Lance and sighed before opening his chat.

 **Sharpshooter <3: I hope you like the show**  
**Keith: Break a leg.**  
**Sharpshooter <3: u only say that in theatre I think jajajaja but tks, Keith**  
**Keith: Good luck, then?**  
**Sharpshooter <3: thanks :)**

The Paladins still had five minutes to prepare, so Keith locked his phone’s screen and put into his pocket. A person entered the stage and asked everyone, kindly, not to record any videos or take photos of the concert. People seemed to agree, but Keith knew that someone would definitely record it. Someone always did. He had watched enough of those private concerts online to know someone _always_ recorded it.

Lance was the first one to enter the stage, followed by Matt, Pidge, Hunk and lastly Shiro. Keith felt sorry for every drummer in the world. They all sat down on their respective stools and Lance greeted the public, who clapped excitedly. Keith tried not staring too much, but Lance looked good. Deadly even. He was wearing a black button up shirt with a glittery dark blue bowtie, a dark denim jacket with the bisexual flag embroidered to its back, really tight black skinny jeans, ripped at the knees with cuffed ends, thin dark blue socks and shiny black oxfords.

They started the concert with the song “Big Times”. It was one of the first songs they had ever released and Keith really liked it. Keith tried dividing his attention between the band members and focusing on Shiro and Pidge more than on Lance.

Lance was hypnotising. If Keith had thought he seemed a bit uncomfortable when he entered the small stage, he didn’t anymore. Lance exhaled confidence in every song, even the slow or sad ones. They covered Arctic Monkeys’ “Do I Wanna Know” and Keith had to stop himself from gaping at Lance. Lance’s eyes were closed at the beginning of the song and he opened them up as he sang the words ‘I dreamt about you near me every night this week’, looking straight at Keith. Keith swallowed loudly and Lance looked away as soon as he finished singing “how many secrets can you keep?”. Was he… Talking to Keith? Or was it coincidental?

Keith looked at Pidge for a second and they were frowning slightly, looking at their keyboard. Keith looked at Shiro, who seemed oblivious and then back at Lance. Lance wasn’t looking at Keith anymore, but he started shooting glances his way during the entire second verse, locking his eyes with Keith’s as he sang the last lines of that verse. He closed his eyes and tightened his grip on the microphone and Keith realised he wasn’t breathing anymore, so he let out his breath and reminded himself he needed oxygen to survive.

The problem with that concert was that the space was really small and didn’t have a lot of people and Keith was way too close to the stage, which meant he could see every detail from very up close, but anyone else could. And if any member of the band looked back at him they would be able to see every detail too. So they would see Keith fidgeting on his seat, trying to refrain from staring at Lance for too long; they would see Keith carving his nails onto his own thigh whenever Lance smirked while singing a song; they would see Keith trying hard not to be a fanboy.

He had wanted to be at an Unplugged session of The Paladins ever since he was sixteen and even though he was _friends_ with them now, that was still his favourite band. He was still managing to live long enough to have his every teenage years’ dream come true. Becoming friends with the members of his favourite band? Check. Going to one of those private concerts? Check. Making out with Lance McClain? Kind of check. If someone had told teenager Keith that all of that would happened to him one day, teenager Keith would’ve probably punch them for trying to toy with his emotions.

But adult Keith was living his dreams and they were incredible. They were slightly chaotic and definitely different from what he’d imagined for most part, but still.

After a few more songs and Keith making sure he kept his focus on Shiro and Pidge, Lance got his acoustic guitar and sat down on the stool again. Keith knew Lance enough to know he was nervous; his hands were starting to sweat a bit – which Keith knew because Lance kept rubbing them on his pants.

“This is new a song called Red.” Lance said into the mic and Keith looked at Pidge for a second. They were looking at Keith, blank expression that sent shivers down Keith’s spine. “I wrote this one very recently, with some help. It’s actually the first time I’m performing it to anyone who’s not in the band after it’s done.” Lance chuckled, looking down for a second. He smiled and Keith couldn’t take his eyes off of Lance anymore. Lance looked up, staring right back at him. “I hope you like it.” He smiled. Keith felt himself nod, lightly, without really meaning too. Lance smiled faintly and closed his eyes.

As soon as he started playing Keith recognised the melody. It was the one he had asked Keith’s opinion on. Keith felt his heart drop to his stomach because, even though the lyrics were happy and hopeful, Lance sounded _very_ sad singing it. Keith felt awfully self-centred because his first thought was that Lance was talking about him. But it couldn’t be; it made no sense. He remembered Pidge telling him he had hurt Lance. He was _hurting_ Lance. Pidge had used a continuum.

Keith felt his hands turn into two fists and his muscles tense up completely. He clenched his jaw and tried scaring those thoughts away. Lance didn’t open his eyes up for the whole song, frowning a bit on some parts of it.

He tried not overthinking it and focusing his energy on admiring how brilliant Lance’s performance was being. It was almost as if Lance had been born to be onstage. All eyes were on him and he captivated the audience because he meant all of the words he sang. Not just on that particular song, that was Lance McClain on stage. He meant his every word and he gave all he had to what he was doing, all of him, all of his soul. And it showed. Because his performances were always as beautiful as Lance’s heart was. Keith was smiling lightly and absentmindedly at his own train of thoughts.

When the song was done, the whole room was filled with applause and Keith had to force himself to clap too. He was breathless and confused and had all sorts of feeling inside of himself and he had no idea what to do or think or say. Lance opened his eyes, but didn’t shoot him a single glance. He smiled facing the crowd and Keith looked at the other band members. They were all looking at Lance, with proud smiles. All of them but Pidge. Pidge was staring at Keith, a worried look on his face. Keith blinked a few times and shook his head. Pidge nodded and looked away.

“Youth” was the next song they played and Keith remembered listening to that song when it had first come out a year and a few months prior to that day. It was a very heartfelt song about losing your youth to wrong choices and having to get through hard times when the world seemed to be crashing on top of you.

The rest of the concert was great, but Keith didn’t manage to pay too much attention, to be honest. He kept his entire focus on Shiro and could only see Lance from the corner of his eyes. Maybe Keith was reading too much into things. Maybe Pidge was right and he needed to talk to Lance and they’d be back to normal.

Keith wasn’t sure he wanted back to normal, though. Maybe if they started rebuilding their relationship from that wrecked point they could actually be friends openly. Or not. He didn’t know. He knew he needed to talk to Lance. Not only because he needed to make things right, but because he missed talking to Lance properly. He wasn’t sure whether he wanted back to “normal”, but he most definitely didn’t want things to remain as they were.

When the concert was over, Keith didn’t even have the time to greet Lance before he was surrounded by people. Lance smiled at him and he nodded. That was actually, in a way, better. Keith walked towards Shiro, who had some people around him too, but didn’t hesitate in delicately pushing a few aside so he could be next to his brother.

“Congrats.” Keith said and Shiro threw his arm around Keith’s shoulder, smiling. “You did great, as expected.” Shiro laughed. Someone handed him a notebook, asking him to sign it and someone else glared at Keith, probably for being so close to Shiro.

“Takashi, people want your autograph now!” Matt shouted from his corner and Shiro laughed loudly. “Told you this day would come!”

“I guess.” Shiro said and chuckled. Keith stepped to the side so Shiro could take photos with some of the fans.

It was hectic and Keith was absolutely sure he had chosen right by not trying a musical career because he would never be able to deal with all that constantly. He liked being unknown, he liked being able not to worry about accidentally saying something the wrong way to a fan and having an entire fan base throw stones at him. He liked not having unknown people touching him so much.

After some time the security guards started scouting people out and the person who had glared at Keith kept on glaring as they realised Keith wasn’t being kicked out like the rest of the fans. Keith shrugged and put his arm around Pidge, pulling them close.

“You were pretty good too. You know, for a goblin.” Keith grinned and Pidge elbowed him. “Stop beating me up, you little shit.” Keith chuckled and pulled Pidge closer and messing up their hair with his free hand.

“Glad you liked it, tall person.” Pidge chuckled and hugged Keith back properly. They let go of each other and Lance approached Keith, carefully. “You rocked that new song, loverboy.”

“Thanks, Pidgeotto.” Lance smirked and looked at Keith. “Hey.”

“Hey.” Keith smiled at him, faintly. Pidge looked up at Keith. “Nice concert.”

“Thanks, dude.” Lance chuckled. “I was pretty nervous to perform that new song, but…”

“But you did great.” Shiro approached them and patted Lance on the shoulder. Lance smiled at him and bowed his head lightly.

“Hey, Shiro, can I talk to you for a second?” Matt called Shiro and everyone collectively sighed, even Keith. They all knew talking was the last thing those two were going to do, but Shiro nodded and followed Matt somewhere.

“Are they _always_ like that?” Keith crossed his arms and Lance chuckled, nodding. “Yikes. Very gross.” He looked down at where Pidge had been and didn’t find them. Keith noticed Pidge was piggybacking Hunk already and they were quietly talking about something. Lance cleared his throat and Keith looked at him. He bit his lower lip. “Guess we were saved by Matt not being able to keep it in his pants.”

“Guess so. The Holt seem to have a thing for drummers.” Lance said and scratched the back of his neck. “Nice jacket.” He said, pointing at Keith’s ‘I’m not interested in being polite or heterosexual’ patch and Keith smiled.

“It made my Uber driver go on a rant about homosexuality being bad, but…” Keith chuckled lightly “Yours is pretty cool too.” Keith offered him a smile and Lance nodded in response. “Are you okay?”

“Still kind of nervous, I guess.” He smiled faintly, looking down. “Did you like the concert?”

“I did.” Keith said and Lance nodded, still looking down. “You played _that_ song.”

“Yeah… I did.” Lance looked up slowly, taking a deep breath. “Did you… Did you like it?” Lance wiped his hands on his pants and Keith looked over Lance’s shoulder, making sure no one was looking at them, before grabbing Lance’s hand. Lance winced away from Keith’s touch, but immediately grabbed Keith’s hand back and intertwined their fingers, stepping a bit closer. Keith hummed.

“I was… Confused.” Keith admitted. “Because the lyrics were happy, but you sounded… so sad. Hurt, even.”

“Sometimes good things can hurt.” Lance said and frowned.

“They’re not supposed to.” Keith said and Lance nodded.

“But sometimes they do.” Lance insisted. “So you didn’t like it?”

“No, I did.” Keith said and squeezed Lance’s hand, smiling. “I liked it. A lot.”

“You’re not… mad at me?” Lance asked, looking away from Keith and Keith frowned.

“Why would I be?” Keith asked, honestly confused.

“Because of the song.” Lance looked back to Keith, who was still frowning. “All things considered, you know?” No. Keith didn’t know. He had no idea what Lance meant. Keith examined Lance’s face and concluded he looked sad. Keith hated that.

“You’re not okay.” Keith stated and Lance didn’t answer. “I’m not mad at you, Lance.”

“Okay.” Lance said and let go of Keith’s hand. Keith opened his mouth to speak, but Lance didn’t let him. “I don’t want to talk about it.” Keith frowned deeper. “Drop it, Ketih.” Lance raised his voice a little; Keith took a step back and nodded. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you.”

“I get it.” Keith crossed his arms. “Congrats on the concert again.” Keith started walking towards a stool, where he could sit down and wait for Shiro, but Lance held his wrist.

“If we pretend that night never happened…” Lance’s voice was low, so Keith had to turn back to face him so he could hear Lance properly. He regretted doing so because Lance’s eyes were slightly watered. “Can we do that? Can we go back to normal?” Keith looked back at Pidge and Hunk. Hunk had his back turned to them, so Keith pulled Lance into a hug. Lanced tensed up for a second before hiding his face in the crook of Keith’s neck and relaxing into Keith’s embrace.

“We can do that.” Keith said and took one of his hands to Lance’s head, scratching his scalp lightly. Lance hugged Keith back. They stayed like that for a while. It was somewhat dangerous because they weren’t the only ones in the room, but Keith tried not to care. He hated the look on Lance’s face and desperately wanted it to go away, so he held Lance close for as long as he deemed necessary.

So Keith _had_ overstepped by doing what he had done at the club. Maybe he had gotten Lance’s signs all wrong and that’s why he had fucked their thing up, whatever it was. But Lance wanted back to their previous relationship and that was good. Keith liked that idea a lot.

They were interrupted by someone cleaning their throat. Keith opened his eyes, he hadn’t even realised he’d closed them, and saw Shiro, arms crossed in front of Keith, smiling fondly. Shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit. Keith panicked, but pushing Lance away would be even weirder and more incriminating, so he tapped on Lance’s back before pulling away from the hug and smiling at him. Lance was frowning a bit, but no longer looked like was about to cry.

“I thought you didn’t like Lance, Keith.” Shiro raised an eyebrow. Lance’s eye widened for a second, but he quickly recomposed and looked at Shiro, grinning.

“No one can resist my charms for long, Shiro.” Lance laughed and Keith rolled his eyes.

“You think too highly of yourself, McClain.” Keith said and Lance chuckled pulling him close in a bro hug. “I actually found out he’s fine.”

“We bonded over our mutual love for anime.” Lance said and Keith nodded, that wasn’t exactly a lie, so it was fine.

“I didn’t know that.” Shiro said and continued smiling. “I’m glad! I was worried it would be weird to have you all over this week if Keith continued disliking you.” Keith frowned.

“Having them over?” He asked and Shiro nodded. “When?”

“In two days. We’re all gathering to play video games.” Shiro said and smiled wider. “And you’ll finally meet Allura!” Keith hummed and Lance let go off him.

“If you’ll excuse me, I have to gather my stuff. Nice seeing you, Keith.” Lance said and blew a kiss to Shiro, who rolled his eyes, chuckling, before leaving the room.

Shiro raised an eyebrow at Keith.

“Are we going?” Keith asked and Shiro chuckled, nodding.

They said their goodbyes and Keith knew he wouldn’t manage to avoid Shiro’s questions on the way back to their flat, so he psyched himself up for that. It took Shiro some time to start asking questions, but he did nonetheless.

“So you’re friends with Lance now?” Keith hummed in response. “Since when?”

“I’m not sure? He texted me one day and we started talking and he proved my judgement wrong, I guess.” Keith shrugged and Shiro chuckled.

“I’m glad, I’m glad. Lance is a pretty nice guy.” Shiro said and sighed. “He’s been going through some stuff lately and he hasn’t really been talking about it. Hunk was pretty worried about him, but he refused talking and kept saying he was fine, but we just know he’s not really well.”

“Yeah, I noticed. Hence the hug.” Keith said, looking out of the window. That wasn’t a lie either, so he was doing pretty well.

“Is it okay to have them over?” Shiro changed the subject and Keith thanked him on the inside.

“Yeah, it’s fine. I’ll be working, though, so I’ll only get home later in the evening.” Keith smiled to Shiro, who nodded. “I look forward to meeting Allura, though.”

“She’s great. Kind of scary sometimes, but she won’t have to intimidate you because she doesn’t manage your career, so you’ll be fine.” Shiro laughed and Keith hummed.

Shiro started telling stories about the few times he had argued with Allura and how terrified he had been, but also how nice and kind she was and Keith didn’t pay much attention, staring through the window of the car.

He was worried about Lance. And confused about why Lance thought he’d be mad at him. Lance was a weird guy, Keith concluded. But he was happy Lance wanted back to normal too, that was good. All he had to do was erase what had happened when they were clubbing. Which was… admittedly hard. It’s not every day that you suck off your teenage years’ celebrity crush who had turned into a friend of yours.

It was for the best, though.

Shiro was tired and went straight into his room, saying good night to Keith, who ate an apple, brushed his teeth and changed into his pyjamas before getting under his covers. He checked his phone and had a bunch of messages from Lance, which made him smile wide. Some of them included photos of Lance in the Uber, Lance making himself eggs for dinner, Lance’s fried eggs and a sausage on a plate making a smiley face. Keith rolled his eyes.

 **Keith: I take it back, you really are very self-centred.**  
**Sharpshooter <3: u hurt me, cariño**  
**Sharpshooter <3: just say the words and I’ll stop sending u photos**

Keith sent Lance a photo of himself under his covers, holding Hippo tightly.

 **Sharpshooter <3: <3 <3**  
**Sharpshooter <3: unbelievably cute**  
**Sharpshooter <3: u should bring Hippo over so he and Pulpsy can meet and befriend each other !!!!!!!**  
**Keith: They’re plushies, Lance.**  
**Sharpshooter <3: so???? >:s**  
**Keith: Ok.**  
**Sharpshooter <3: YEAH !!! :***  
**Sharpshooter <3: hey keef ma man**  
**Keith: Yeah?**  
**Sharpshooter <3: thanks for giving me another shot**  
**Keith: No problems, Lance.**  
**Sharpshooter <3: <33**  
**Keith: <3** **  
Sharpshooter <3** **️:** **:***

Keith plugged his phone to the charger and opened the YouTube app to watch some videos before dozing off to sleep. He woke up the next morning feeling way better than he had felt in a long time.

Work was pretty dull, but easy that day, which was good. Keith used his lunch time to listen to music. He decided to re watch some of the videos Lance had sent him and that made him feel all warm inside.

Keith knew he would need to talk properly with Lance eventually. Especially since now Shiro knew they were friends, it was only a matter of time until they had to tell Shiro the whole truth. The problem was that Keith himself didn’t know what to say. And he didn’t want to think about that, honestly.

Lance was back to his easily excited, bubbly, talkative self, apparently. Even Pidge had texted Keith thanking him for talking to Lance, which was a good sign, right? So Keith decided he would let things happen naturally. When the time to talk about serious matters came they would talk about serious matters. Keith wouldn’t push. He was back at casual approach, it seemed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaanyway, that was it. i hope you enjoyed it <3  
> please hmu if u find any grammar errors or w/e c:
> 
> i made a [playlist for the fic on spotify](https://open.spotify.com/user/playlandi/playlist/2vr6vymACCES9lHyLx2Qf4?si=XlmFxYmISimyOxHSnCKHxA), which i plan on updating as i go. some songs might not make a lot of sense at this point in time, but they're all songs that either are a part of the fic or inspired me in my creative process, so ~  
> if you want to reach out to me outside of ao3 you can do it through either [my les mis blog](https://whensunscollide.tumblr.com) or [my personal messy blog](https://marsisnotcreative.tumblr.com). i also have the link to all my other social media there!  
> also feel free to consider buying me a coffee ko-fi.com/playlandi


	9. Mercy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith has a shitty day at work. The Paladins all gather at his and Shiro's apartment to play video games.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hellon, beautiful youngsters <3 i hope yall had a great week. to make up with me posting chapters late 2 weeks i'm posting this one a few hours before i usually do lçdfasofdkdsçlksd  
> the title comes from shawn mende's "mercy". a great song. am i having a shawn mendes phase??? maybe. you can't prove it tho so shrug emoji m8s
> 
> anyway, thanks for the comments and kudos and all, yall are great <3  
> i hope you enjoy the chapter <3

Kolivan was all up Keith’s ass that day. Keith had gotten a grand total of _five_ minutes late to work because traffic was bad and he hopped off the bus three stops before his actual one or he would’ve gotten even later to the café. But Kolivan thought that, plus him having gotten Keith that phone notice weeks before that meant Keith was being at his undisciplined self. And to top it all a customer had tried to grab Keith’s ass from _behind_ the counter and Keith snapped at him.

So Kolivan kept watching Keith the whole day. It was very uncomfortable and it meant Keith couldn’t slip up at all. The first wrong move he made would mean he would have to stay about ten minutes after work to listen to Kolivan scolding him about how he needed to focus more on work, etc, etc, etc. Keith really didn’t need that. He was a great employee and Kolivan _knew_ that.

Having Kolivan all over him during his work hours meant Keith would get home and just want to go to bed. But he wouldn’t be able to because Shiro’s friends would be over and he would have to stay with them at least for a while. Great.

I was fine, though. Keith had had worse days at work before, especially before having started working at the café. He’d worked at a thrift shop once and had to deal with a bunch of noisy and awful teenagers who would go there at least once a week just to make a mess of the store and Keith would be responsible for kicking them all, but then get scolded for using physical strength or shouting at the kids. He’d worked as a waiter once and couldn’t deal with big groups of white rich adults shouting with other employees because they’d let a couple sit before them when they had gotten there first and would just be even louder as the employee tried explaining they couldn’t sit a group with seven people at a table for two. Keith had gotten fired for getting in the middle of one of those arguments and actually leading the group to a table for two and telling them to ‘fucking sit on the floor or on each other’s fucking laps, then’. His employer hadn’t really liked his attitude or his language.

Besides, Keith had a zero patience policy with grabby people at work – or in general. He had always been the type of person who got into fights when he saw people sexual harassing others on the street. The reason he had been fired from his job at the thrift shop was him having punched the owner square on the jaw when he had sexually harassed one of Keith’s female co-workers and made a joke about it to Keith. Keith hadn’t even have time to think, he didn’t even let the guy finish his “joke”; he just saw it happen and turned around to punch him as hard as possible.

That meant that he not only wouldn’t let the customer _touch_ him, but he didn’t plan on letting them get away with trying to. So when they tried, Keith started shouting and Kolivan had to actually keep Keith from jumping on the customer and pick a physical fight.

“Keith.” Kolivan started after dragging him to the ‘employees only’ area. “Hurting our customers is unacceptable.”

“Trying to grab people’s ass without consent is unacceptable.” Keith answered and gritted his teeth. Kolivan sighed.

“I understand.” Kolivan held Keith’s shoulder. “But you cannot try to punch our customers.” Keith groaned and nodded, trying to refrain from rolling his eyes at his _boss_. “Calm down and go back when you feel ready. I will take care of that man and be sure he leaves fast.” Keith nodded again and sat down for a second.

It was unfair for Kolivan to be so up his ass as he was, but Keith was grateful that, even still, Kolivan was willing to let that one slide because he knew Keith had a point. Was his way the best was to deal with the situation? No. Was it right and work appropriate to shoot first, ask questions later? Definitely not. But he did have a point.

The rest of the day was uneventful, but Kolivan had stayed even closer; he had paid even more attention to Keith’s every move, to his every right and wrong. So when the time to leave arrived, Keith felt like the luckiest man in the universe and left as quickly as possible before Kolivan could pull him to the side and lecture him about something.

He texted Shiro, letting him know he was on his way to the apartment and asking whether Shiro wanted him to pick up something on the way. Shiro replied when Keith was near the final bus stop already.

 **Shiro: YeS!!!!!**  
**Shiro: Srory I’m playig Guitra Heor**  
 **Shiro: Wait**  
 **Shiro: Ok, yes I do.**  
 **Shiro: Popcorn, a pack of beer (any beer), vanilla ice cream (two or three?) and chocolate syrup. Do you still have my card with you?**  
 **Keith: I do.**  
 **Shiro: Great. Use that.**  
 **Keith: Ok.**  
 **Shiro: Wait, Lance is asking for Heineken, specifically. And Matt wants chocolate bars for us to melt and put on top of the ice cream.**  
 **Shiro: Hunk wants saltless peanuts?**  
 **Keith: Something else?**  
 **Shiro: Not really.**  
 **Keith: Ok. I’ll get there in a few.**

Keith received texts from Lance.

 **Sharpshooter <3: did Shiro tell u to bring me a copy of the latest edition of glossip magazine?**  
**Keith: He didn’t.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: bad bad Shiro**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: can u do that for me?**  
 **Keith: Absolutely not.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: pleeeeeeeeease?????????**  
 **Keith: Bye, Lance.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: u r the worst ugh**

Keith rolled his eyes, but had to confess he was curious to know why Lance wanted that. So he would definitely check the magazine. The supermarket was fuller than usually and, honestly, Keith just wanted to go home. He grabbed all of the items and regretted having offered because he had to carry that pack of beer and all of the other stuff by himself. He also got four packages of gummi animals – two of bears and two of worms, because he wanted to eat some and also because he knew Lance liked them with his ice cream. He also decided to buy toothpaste and soap because they were almost out of them, anyway.

He found the magazine and there was an enormous photo of Lance from the Unplugged session in front of it, so Keith was curious. The headline read “has Loverboy Lance finally settled?” so Keith, naturally, bought the magazine, even though he told Lance he wouldn’t. In his defence, he was curious to know what they were talking about, but he could always tell Lance he changed his mind because the magazine also promised an article speculating about Shiro’s arm and that _definitely_ interested Keith.

As soon as he got to their floor, Keith could hear Pidge telling Matt to stick something up his butt. Judging by their tone, Pidge was probably losing the game. Keith opened the door and entered the apartment, closing the door quickly behind him, trying to save the neighbours from the string of curses that left Matt’s mouth when Pidge actually managed to turn the game around and win last minute.

“Motherfucking son of a bitch!” Matt groaned and Pidge jumped from the ground, laughing manically.

“We have the same mother, Matt. But mamma raised me no loser, loser.” Pidge answered and Matt tried kicking them down, but they managed to jump over his leg. “Hey, Keef! I just wrecked Matt, it was incredible!” Pidge said and Keith waved at them.

“Nice.” He offered Pidge a thumbs up. “Hey, everyone.” Lance stood up.

“Let me help with the bags.” He said and Keith nodded, handing him half of the bags as soon as he got near. “Be right back. Lura, you can play my round.”

“Okie dokie.” Allura said and got Matt’s control. Keith saw Shiro smile at him and then look away to comfort Matt, who was sitting on his lap and had turned to face Shiro.

Keith and Lance walked to the kitchen in silence. They put the grocery bags on top of the counter, near the sink. Keith had been smart enough to put the magazine in the same bag as the bathroom items, so he excused him for just a second to put them in the bathroom. He hid the magazine in his room, not really planning to give it to Lance, and got back to the kitchen to help Lance put things in their proper places.

“I got you these.” Keith pointed to the bag with the gummi animals. “For the ice cream.” Lance smiled wide when he saw what they were. “Actually, I got you one of each, the other two are mine.”

“You’re the best!” Lance grabbed Keith’s hand and pulled him into a hug. Keith didn’t hug him back, but didn’t push him away.

“I thought I was the worst.” Keith joked and Lance chuckled, kissing his cheek. Keith had to hold back an inhuman sound. No matter how many times Lance held his hand or hugged him, he apparently wasn’t getting used to that any time soon. But having Lance _kiss his cheek_ was something else entirely.

“You’re decent.” Lance let him go and shrugged. “Where do I put these?” He pointed at the pack of beer. Keith shrugged.

“I don’t know. Freezer? They’re probably warm and people don’t really drink warm beer, do they?” He grabbed the ice cream packages and put them into the freezer, leaving the door open, so Lance could choose whether he was going to put the beer that or not. Lance did.

“Have you never had beer before?” Lance asked and Keith shook his head. “Oh, you should try one. You look like you’ll like it. It’s bitter. You can have a taste of mine later.” Keith shrugged.

“Trying to get me drunk again, McClain?” Keith joked, but regretted when he realised Lance had stopped in the middle of his movement. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have brought that up…” Lance put the last beer in the freezer, closed the door and turned around to face Keith. He wasn’t exactly smiling, but his lips were curved.

“It’s okay.” Lance said and put his hands into his pockets. “I’ll leave the rest to you.” Keith nodded and Lance left him to his own thoughts and the rest of the bags.

Keith made a mental note: do not mention the clubbing night again. He could do that. And he had no idea why he had thought it was a good idea to make that joke. After putting every item where it belonged, Keith walked to the living room so he could socialise a little.

He had left his shoes in his room when he had gone there, so he sat down on the sofa, next to Allura – which was the only free spot –, and put his  feet on it, hugging his own knees to his chest.

“Hello.” Allura greeted him and offered him her hand to shake. “We haven’t met yet. I’m Allura.”

“Keith.” He shook her hand. “I heard a bunch of things about you.”

“Oh…” Allura blinked a few times. “Nice things, I hope?”

“Yeah. Nice things.” Keith smiled at her, reassuringly. Allura smiled back.

“I’ve heard a lot about you too. Mostly from Shiro, naturally.” Allura stated, but something on the way she said that put Keith off. He decided to ignore that feeling. “So, Keith, are you good at video games?”

“Kinda.” Keith shrugged.

“He sucks.” Pidge said and Keith threw a pillow at them. “You can’t hit me for shit, tall person. Your aim sucks.”

“Shut up, Pidgeon.” Keith said and laughed. “I’m good at racing games.” He said facing Allura. “And I’m okay in Guitar Hero. I’m just bad at shooting things, I guess.”

“You’re _awful_ at shooting things.” Lance said and Keith glared at him. He was not supposed to know that, he was not supposed to say that. What if people thought it was weird and asked about it? Would they tell people they’d been to the arcade? But that would mean letting people know they were closer than people thought they were and Keith wasn’t sure that was a good idea. “You just missed Pidge and they are ridiculously close to you.” Lance completed and looked away from Keith. No one seemed to find the comment odd, so Keith stopped glaring.

“Are _you_ good at video games?” He asked Allura, who was no longer looking at him, but was facing Lance. That made her look at him again and she hummed.

“I’m good at board games.” She confessed. “But I’m pretty decent at games like Banjo-Kazooie? Maybe because they require some strategy.”

“You know who’s _great_ at games like that?” Hunk started saying, not taking his eyes off the screen. “Coran is.” He completed and Pidge nodded frantically. “It’s a shame he couldn’t come.”

“Someone had to stay at Altea.” Allura said and sighed. “Even though I told him he could have let Nyma in charge today, he doesn’t like leaving the place.”

“It’s a miracle we got _you_ to come today.” Lance pointed out. “You know, ‘cause you love staying there as much as you can. Whenever you’re not doing band stuff you’re there.”

“That place is very important to me.” Allura agreed. “Have you ever been to Altea, Keith?” She asked. Keith felt that same sharp thing he had felt before in her voice and he frowned lightly, nodding.

“We used to go together when we were younger.” Shiro answered for him and Keith seized the opportunity, since Allura had turned to face Shiro, to look at Lance. Lance was facing the screen, but Keith noticed he had his jaw clenched. That was weird. “But we stopped after some time.” Allura hummed. “No!” Shiro said when he lost a streak and Hunk actually managed to beat him. The song finished and Shiro lost. He looked back and handed Keith the controller. “Wanna play once?” Keith nodded. Hunk handed his controller to Lance, who was close to him.

“You can pick the song.” Lance said and grinned smugly. “Pick your best song, so it’ll feel better when I wreck you ass.” Keith huffed and smiled too, decided to destroy Lance in the game.

“Yeah, sure thing, McClain.” Keith chose Play With Me. Pidge wolf whistled. “Wanna go on an easier mode?” Keith asked and Lance glared at him. “I won’t judge.”

“I’ll make you eat dirt, Kogane.” Lance declared and they both chose the extreme mode. “Winner owes loser a favour. Any favour.”

“Deal.” Keith said and tried focusing on the game. He wasn’t planning on losing, so it was fine.

Over Pidge’s shouts, Matt telling Shiro to cover his eyes because he didn’t want to see Keith and Lance publicly humiliating themselves like that, Hunk cheering for Lance and Allura saying they were both insane, they could hear the song coming from the TV speakers. Keith wasn’t _good_ at that song, obviously. But there was no way he would’ve picked a song that could be easy for Lance. If he was going down, he was taking Lance with him. Besides, it was okay to get the notes wrong as long as he got more notes right than Lance.

The game was almost a tie. Lance was actually pretty fine at that song, which meant Keith was in danger. He tried desperately not to lose and actually managed to stay on the lead until the end of the song, when he missed his streak and Lance turned things around, standing up and playing the last few notes of the song on his feet, already shouting. Keith’s head had started hurting and all of the exaggerated reactions in the room weren’t helping at all. Pidge was shouting too and punching Lance on the leg. Lance was laughing and Shiro was looking at Keith with pity in his eyes.

Allura touched Keith’s shoulder and offered him a smile. He just managed to nod to her.

“Oh my _God_. Some call nine one one, I just witnessed a _murder_!” Matt said and put his hands over his face, dramatically.

“More like a suicide. He was the one who picked the song.” Hunk pointed out and Matt started laughing so hard that tears were coming out of his eyes. “Sorry, Keith, bro.” Hunk said and Keith tried smiling to him.

“Who’s next?” Keith said and Lance crossed his arms in front of his chest, raising an eyebrow. “What?”

“I thought you’d ask for a rematch.” Lance said. “But if you’re scared it’s fine, I understand.”

“My head hurts.” Keith limited his answer and shrugged. Allura got the controller from his hand, delicately.

“I’ll avenge you, Keith.” She said and Keith chuckled, smiling at her.

“Thanks.” He hugged his knees again and Allura let Lance pick a song.

As Keith watched them play his head started hurting even more, so he closed his eyes and buried his face between his own legs, trying not to groan. Pidge was being very loud and he heard a bunch of curses coming from Allura’s mouth, which made him chuckle. She had an adorable accent and he would’ve never pictured her cursing like that. Allura probably knew more curse words than Keith did and a new contest began between her and Lance: they seemed to be competing to know who knew more curse words too.

Allura said a bunch of stuff in languages Keith recognised, but also in languages he had no idea even existed. Lance limited his vocabulary to English, Spanish and what Keith guessed to be Brazilian Portuguese. Heknew _a lot_ of words. But Allura knew way more. She actually won on the game and on the side competition and Lance stated he was happy he hadn’t bet anything with her. That made Keith groan. Right, he owed Lance a favour now. He was probably screwed.

Keith managed to stay for a few more rounds and actually be there to play one round of Need for Speed – he played against Shiro and absolutely wrecked him – before his head started hurting too much for him to stay around. He didn’t want people to think he was making excuses, so he honestly tried to hold on for as long as he could, but he felt like it was going to explode.

“Well, this has been grand, but I’m not feeling very good.” Keith said and Shiro turned quickly to face him. “My head hurts.” He explained and Shiro nodded.

“I have some meds, if you’d like.” Allura offered and Keith smiled at her, standing up.

“I’ve got some in my room too, but thanks, Allura.” She nodded. “Anyway, I might be back later, I’ll just take a pill and try to rest a little.”

“Want us to tone down a little?” Shiro asked, touching Keith’s leg. Keith chuckled. Even if he really did, he knew them better than that. It would be just a matter of time before they started screaming all over again because they were over excited.

“It’s okay, don’t worry about it.” Keith said and Shiro nodded.

He went to his room and closed the door behind him, getting a headache pill from his bag and downing it without any water to help and proceeding jumping on his bed. He rested his head on his own pillow and closed his eyes for a while, letting his consciousness drift and he tried ignoring the pounding. He heard a knock on the door after some time and hummed, eyes still closed. He heard it open and close.

“Excuse me.” A voice spoke up. It wasn’t the voice he had expected. He had expected Shiro’s voice and that wasn’t Shiro’s voice. It was much higher than Shiro’s. “Shiro made you chamomile tea.” Keith groaned and sat down, opening his eyes up and letting his back rest against the wall. “Actually I made it so Shiro didn’t have to stop playing, since he was wrecking Pidge and that’s priceless.” Keith chuckled. “The goblin deserves to suffer.”

“Thanks, Lance.” Keith motioned for Lance to get closer to him. Lance nodded and handed him the tea, then rubbed his hands on his jeans. “Wanna sit?” Lance nodded and sat beside Keith on his bed.

“You okay?” Lance asked as Keith sipped the tea.

“Work was stressful, that’s all.” Keith smiled at him and Lance wrapped one of his arms around Keith, who automatically snuggled closer to Lance. Lance chuckled and Keith didn’t comment on that. “How are you?”

“Better now.” Lance said in a flirtatious tone and Keith rolled his eyes, huffing. “But I’m fine. Have you watched the last video I sent you?” Keith drank more tea and shook his head lightly. Lance hummed and kissed the top of Keith’s head. “It’s a special one because a little bird happened to mention you really like that song.” Keith tensed up a bit and hummed. He didn’t like the idea of people talking about him; it was kind of dangerous because someone could end up slipping the fact that Keith was a fan of The Paladins and he _really_ didn’t want that.

“Can you do the hair thing?” Keith asked and Lance hummed.

“Cafuné?” Lance asked and Keith nodded. Lance took one of his hands to Keith’s hair and started playing with it, lightly scratching Keith’s scalp with his nails and Keith accidentally let out a very pleased moan he decided to pretend had never happened. Lance didn’t comment on it and Keith was thankful for that. Keith sipped the tea again. Lance started humming a melody; not any melody, but the one from the song Keith had helped him with.

Keith closed his eyes for an instant, focusing on Lance’s voice and touch. He knew it was risky to stay like that when everyone else was on the other side of the door, a few steps away from finding the two of them like that. But it felt good, so Keith let himself enjoy it for a bit. He deserved it after the day he’d had. He craved it even. Keith didn’t let himself think about whether that was bad - he knew it probably was, but it didn’t really matter. He would stress about it when he was alone and sulking, not when he had the chance of having Lance cuddle him.

“When are you free again?” Lance asked and Keith opened his eyes.

“Next Thursday. Why?” Keith responded and Lance hummed.

“Thursday is a shitty day for me...” Lance said and Keith frowned lightly; that made zero sense. “Are you free on Friday night?” Keith hesitated for a second.

“Yeah, I get home around six and I’m free the whole night after that. Why?” Keith carefully took the mug to his mouth and sipped again, trying not to drop anything.

“You owe me a favour.” Lance said and Keith groaned. Lance chuckled. “So you’re coming to Altea with me and we’re having dinner and I’m paying.”

“Are you sure that’s what you wanna spend your favour on?” Keith said and opened his eyes, finishing his tea and getting away from Lance just to put the mug somewhere safe.

“Would you go with me if not as a favour?” Lance asked and Keith frowned, looking at him.

“What sort of question even is that? Of course I would.” Keith said and Lance’s jaw dropped just a little. He gaped at Keith for a while. “Have I not done that before? That’s where we went the first time we...” Keith hesitated, searching for the right words. “Hung out.” He decided to stick to Lance’s original words. It was safer that way. Lance nodded and Keith sighed, grabbing Lance’s hand. “Keep your favour.”

“You’ll let me pay?” Lance squeezed Keith’s hand lightly. Keith shook his head. “Then I’m using my favour.”

“I’m not letting you waste the favour like that, Lance.” Keith sighed one more time. “But I don’t feel comfortable with you paying, you know that.”

“This might sound really bad, but... You’ve seen where I live. I told you my story. Money is not an issue for me, so let me treat you.” Lance said and started pulling Keith closer to him. “Please.”

“The fact that you have all that only makes it worse. I hardly ever accept money from Shiro and he’s my _brother_.” Keith said and Lance’s expression changed. He seemed hurt. “We’ll split the bill.”

“You’re either agreeing spontaneously or I’m using the favour.” Lance shrugged. “Because that was the bet: any favour. And you lost the game.” Keith sighed and actually got closed to Lance, nodding and grabbing the magazine from under his pillow before letting Lance hug him close once more.

“Has Loverboy Lance finally settled?” Keith read the words out loud and felt Lance tense up. “Our favourite blue eyed Cuban greek-god-looking vocalist hasn’t been seen with anyone for months now and the fans started speculating about it. Has the Paladins’ lead vocalist finally found someone? Or has he been laying low for now? As mentioned in our last edition, The Paladins have been pretty secretive about their lives ever since our beloved hot looking bassist, Lotor, left the band with little to no explanation. Allura, the band’s manager, has refused to give the fans any proper clues about why he left The Paladins. Ever since that happened, Loverboy Lance has not been spotted with anyone.” Keith paused for a second, giving Lance the chance to ask him to stop if he wanted to. “That led us to wonder: has the lead singer of The Paladins finally settled? Or is he so heartbroken from Lotor leaving that he hasn’t tried to find anyone else?” Keith frowned. “Wait, what does that mean?”

“Nothing. It’s _Glossip_ , Keith.” Lance said, reminding him of that fact, and kissed the back of Keith’s head. “Keep going.”

“On a recent very private concert, Lance performed what seems to be The Paladins’ new song: Red. It seems to tell the story of someone who found love in an unexpected place. When asked about it by one of the fans, Lance simply answered saying the song’s meaning was up to the listener.” Keith paused again. “Red’s lyrics seem to talk about love and uncertainty, but also about finding comfort and happiness in someone else. Whether that song is about Lance’s personal love life or not is anybody’s guess, but, for now, we hope for the best. Being it Loverboy Lance settling in a happy and healthy relationship or spotting him with new marks around his neck, as we always have.” Keith finished and Lance hugged him tighter. “Well, that was one the worst written articles in the history of this magazine.” Lance chuckled.

“Yeah.” He agreed and Keith intertwined their fingers. “Thanks for getting it for me.” Keith hesitated for a second, but decided against lying.

“I saw the cover photo and I was curious.” Keith admitted. “Can I ask you something?” Lance hummed. “Do you care? About them scrutinising your entire life like this.”

“I hate it.” Lance said and shrugged. “But it could be worse. So I try pretending I can live a normal life and own up to whatever I actually do.” Keith hummed. “Sorry about almost outing us earlier on.” Keith didn’t answer. “I know you were mad and I’m honestly glad I managed a good save, but… I didn’t think and I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. You didn’t mean to.” Keith said and squeezed Lance’s hand. “I wasn’t mad, I was just… A bit apprehensive, I guess…” Lance hummed.

Silence fell between them for some time. Keith was trying not to think about the fact that it was probably a little weird for Lance to have vanished from the living room to stay with him and that people could mention, could ask about it. It was tiring. To keep worrying about what he would tell Shiro, about whether people knew things about him. He could only imagine what it was like to feel that constantly; because Keith had one situation he was hiding, Lance was basically expected to hide his entire life from the scrutinising eyes of the press.

It was so easy for him to just give in to Lance’s embrace and let himself relax into it, his headache was actually starting to go away, even though Keith could still hear Pidge cursing and Matt making dramatic comments on the living room.

“Oh.” Lance said. Keith waited, but Lance didn’t say anything else.

“What?” Keith asked and tried turning to face Lance, who was smiling in a sweet way. Lance shrugged and shook his head. “Something wrong?”

“No.” Lance hugged Keith tighter. “I should probably head back to them. Do you want me to bring you ice cream when we do open it?”

“If you don’t mind.” Keith answered and Lance nodded, letting go of him and standing up from the bed. “Can you put the worms in it? And some melted chocolate too…” Lance was facing Keith; he chuckled and nodded again, putting his hands on both sides of Keith’s face and holding it. “What?” Keith could feel his whole face starting to burn, but he didn’t move. Lance’s smile widened.

“You’re cute.” Lance got very close to Keith, grip firm on his head, and kissed the tip of his nose. “Even cuter when you’re blushing.” Lance chuckled and Keith pushed him away, crossing his arms in front of his chest and looking away from Lance. “Cute and aggressive.”

“Fuck off, Lance.” Keith said and lied down on the bed again, hiding his face on his pillow. “Thanks for the tea.” Keith said, voice muffled.

“Don’t worry. Make it up to me by letting me pay for dinner and we’ll be fine.” Lance answered and Keith turned to face him.

“That makes no sense at all.” Keith pointed out and Lance shrugged. “We’ll talk about it on Friday, okay?” Keith half-compromised and Lance nodded before leaving the room. Keith closed his eyes and sighed.

He should just let Lance waste his favour already and he knew that, but it was a stupid thing to ask of Keith. And Keith trusted Lance, he knew Lance wouldn’t use that favour for something too out of their realm of possibilities. Lance wouldn’t use that to hurt Keith in any way or make Keith seriously embarrass himself. He trusted Lance.

Was Keith comfortable with letting Lance pay? No. But for some reason it was important for Lance and if it was important for Lance maybe Keith could consider. He didn’t want to see Lance sad ever again, he wanted Lance happy. Keith was so monumentally screwed and he knew he should be building walls, he knew he would end up hurting. But he honestly preferred to hurt himself than to hurt Lance, so if it took him getting way too deep into whatever they had going on before Lance putting an end to whatever it was they were doing, then Keith was going to do that. He never wanted to hear anyone tell him that he was hurting Lance. Because Lance didn’t deserve to be hurting and Keith had a feeling he still was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oki, so, so, soooo. they're kinda more chill now, right? am i going to be threatened? i don't think so hMMM we'll see ldsfa~lksd
> 
> "cafuné" is a ptbr word for playing with someone's hair, running our fingers through someone's hair, etc.
> 
> i always say this, but i made a [playlist for the fic on spotify](https://open.spotify.com/user/playlandi/playlist/2vr6vymACCES9lHyLx2Qf4?si=XlmFxYmISimyOxHSnCKHxA). some songs might not make a lot of sense at this point in time, but they're all songs that either are a part of the fic or inspired me in my creative process, so ~  
> if you want to reach out to me outside of ao3 you can do it through either [my les mis blog](https://whensunscollide.tumblr.com) or [my personal messy blog](https://marsisnotcreative.tumblr.com). i also have the link to all my other social media there!  
> also feel free to consider buying me a coffee ko-fi.com/playlandi


	10. But when you're here with me it's hard to tell just what you're after

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith and Lance go back to Altea to have dinner. Shiro worries. Keith is more confused about Lance each day, but he doesn't want to risk losing his friendship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title of the chapter from shawn mendes' "mutual" because, look, i was deffo in a shawn mendes phase when i wrote this ldsfjaodflçdsksdl  
> i wanted to thank the incredible anon and @nonbinary_queen, who consistently comment on the fic! you're the best, thank you so much for reading and commenting, it changes everything for me as a writer <3  
> also everyone who bookmarked and left kudos: you all rock <3 thanks!!!
> 
> while we're at it, consider buying me a coffee if you're able to ko-fi.com/playlandi  
> i'll stop rambling now hauhauha

That whole week Lance and Keith chatted more than the usual. Keith was extremely careful at work, not answering texts right away, but to make up for that, he also sent Lance more photos and even some audios whenever he could. Lance was sending him videos of him covering songs every day, a video per day. Keith even dared to request songs and Lance was excited about the ones that were within his vocal range. It was nice and Keith managed to either fall asleep to Lance’s singing or wake up and hear him first thing in the morning.

If it was anyone else Keith would be bothered, but it was Lance. So he didn’t mind. It didn’t feel like too much. And when Keith vanished for a while Lance understood, he didn’t pressure Keith to answer all the time. It felt good, it felt right.

Two days into the week Lance asked Keith to facetime and they did, which became a habit. They started facetiming every night after the third time and Lance would play songs for Keith to fall asleep or show Keith some parts of a new song he was working on. Keith wouldn't comment on the song until Lance asked his opinion, so he would say what he would do different and what he would definitely keep and Lance would make a few adjustments if he agreed.

Thursday was odd because Keith had a free day, but Lance was busy on rehearsal and, therefore, Shiro wasn’t home either. Keith turned Shiro’s PlayStation on and started playing Guitar Hero while eating the leftover the ice cream with chocolate syrup and gummi worms on top. He sent Lance a photo of the TV screen as one of the songs was loading.

For a brief second, as he waited the game to load, Keith wondered how much did a keyboard cost; he missed playing and on a day like that he could be doing so, but he wasn't because he didn’t have one. He couldn’t depend on Lance being at his flat whenever Keith felt like playing. He also couldn’t just invite himself over every time he felt like playing the piano, even though Lance had told him he was always invited. After a few songs he got a text back from Lance.

 **Sharpshooter <3: awwwnnn r u missing getting your ass kicked? <3**  
**Keith: You got lucky.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: sure thing princess**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: whatever makes u feel better ;***  
 **Sharpshooter <3: we’re on a break rn because Matt was getting hungry, so Hunk decided to order take out with him**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: u still playing?**  
 **Keith: Yup.**  
 **Keith: Do you know when you’ll be free?**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: we still have a few hours to go. u missing me that bad? I’m probably not going to sing much in the next two hours, so I can be all yours <3**  
 **Keith: Cool.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: maybe we could facetime**  
 **Keith: Is that allowed?**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: what Allura doesn’t know can’t hurt her**  
 **Keith: I don’t want you to get in trouble.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: I won’t**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: promise**  
 **Keith: Ok.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: cool!**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: Hunk and Matt are back with food. I’ll call you in thirty minutes when I’m done eating?**  
 **Keith: Sounds like a deal.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: nice, nice, see u in a bit, cariño**

Keith threw his phone on the sofa and waited, while playing some other songs. He wondered if facetiming during rehearsal was actually fine, but if Lance had said so then maybe it was? He didn’t know how that worked and he hadn’t dared taken in Shiro’s offer to go down there with him, since it was Keith’s free day from work, because he knew it was dangerous to accidentally let his fanboy persona out.

His phone started vibrating and Keith stopped mid song, pausing the game and picking Lance’s call up.

“ _Hey, beautiful._ ” Lance greeted him, voice in a normal tone. Keith could hear Allura saying something in the background, but her voice sounded muffled.

“Are you sure you won’t get in trouble?” Keith asked and Lance chuckled.

“ _I’ve got my headphones on and they’re on the other side of the glass._ ” Lance switched to the back camera of his phone so he could show the studio to Keith. “ _See? You’ll barely hear anything from the rehearsal and Allura usually stays on that side. I always come to this side and nap or something when I’m not being useful._ ” Lance switched back to the front camera and Keith hummed. “ _So, tell me: how’s your day going?_ ”

“Fine. Yours?” Keith didn’t have a lot to talk about, as always.

“ _I showed them some parts of that song you were helping me with earlier today and they seemed to like it a lot, so there’s that._ ” Lance bit the skin next to the nails from his right thumb. “ _And Hunk is writing a new song too. Hunk’s songs are the best, they’re my favourite ones. Do you know_ Never Let Go _? It’s from our second album and Hunk was the one who wrote it._ ” Lance said and smiled. “ _It’s a great song._ ” Keith hummed. “ _It’s a great album, actually. Most of the songs were written by either Hunk or Pidge._ Blue _is mine and_ Flying High _is..._ ” Lance stopped himself for a second. “ _It’s Lotor’s. I helped, but it’s mostly his._ ”

“Does Matt write too?” Keith asked, trying to get Lance’s attention off of Lotor. He had caught up on the fact that Lance didn’t like having Lotor being brought up and, honestly, neither did Keith.

“ _Sometimes. Not much. He wrote_ Hero _, from out third album, but just the lyrics. The melody was Hunk and I. And Allura helped with the lyrics of a few songs too, actually._ ” Lance answered and started looking a bit happier already. “ _We’re actually hoping that Matt and Shiro write a song together for our next album because that would be_ really _cool and we’d love to have a song written by Shiro in the new album, but he’s reluctant about that.”_

“Yeah… Shiro never really liked composing, he judges himself too harshly.” Keith said and Lance smiled.

“ _He told us you’re good at it though._ ” Lance’s smiled widened and Keith felt himself blush. “ _You could show me something you’ve written one of these days._ ”

“No.” Keith limited his answer to that and Lance chuckled, but didn't pressure him. “So, what time tomorrow?” Lance hummed.

“ _Seven thirty at Altea?_ ” Lance hesitated. “ _I don’t know, I’m getting home at five, probably, so I’ll have plenty of time to get ready before seven. Which is my way of saying: I picked the place, you pick the time._ ” Keith laughed lightly and nodded.  Allura’s voice called Lance; he looked up and muted his microphone for a second. Keith could see Lance nodding and managed to read a couple of words coming from his lips like ‘no’ and ‘cover’. “ _Hey, sorry. 'Lura wanted me to know if I had a thing ready._ ”

“It’s okay. You’re working, we shouldn’t be on your phone.” Keith said and Lance rolled his eyes.

“ _It’s honestly fine. I’d be napping if we weren’t doing this. If they need me, they'll come for me._ ” He said and Keith hummed, biting the insides of his own cheek. “ _Anyway, what time do you prefer?_ ”

“Seven thirty is fine. I’ll get home around six in the evening and I’ll just get changed, probably, maybe shower pretty quickly and leave, so it’s fine.” Keith said and shrugged. “If something comes up I’ll let you know.”

“ _Great!_ ” Lance smiled. “ _I never asked you, but do you have something you don’t you’re allergic to or something you hate eating?_ ”

“Not really.” Keith frowned slightly, thinking about it. “I eat anything. My favourite thing to eat is probably chicken, though? Any chicken.” Lance chuckled and nodded. “Why?” Lance shook his head.

“ _Do you like pasta?_ ” Lance asked and Keith nodded. “ _With lots of cheese and tomato sauce_?”

“Yeah, yeah. Father used to make that for us a lot. He tried teaching me once but…” Keith chuckled. “Didn’t quite work out.”

“ _What happened?_ ” Lance’s smile grew wider.

“I burnt the kitchen. Nothing major, just, like, a small fire, but.” Keith confessed. “In my defence, he left me, a _child_ , unsupervised while he was calling Shiro to go help us.” Lance raised an eyebrow. “Ok, it was a matter of _seconds_ , but I was a kid!”

“ _Weren’t you fourteen when you moved in with them?_ ” Lance asked, carefully and Keith blushed a little. “ _Oh my God, mullet, you weren’t a kid.”_ Lance laughed loudly.

“Stop fucking calling me that.” Keith groaned and Lance chuckled.

“ _Sorry, princess._ ” Lance grinned and Keith narrowed his eyes. “ _You’re so hard to please, Shiro’s lil brother._ ”

“Now you’re just being an asshole.” Keith said and rolled his eyes; Lance chuckled again. “You can call me by my name, for instance.”

“ _You won’t mind that?”_ Lance’s expression changed, but Keith couldn’t quite figure what it was or why it changed. “ _I mean, people might hear me, you know… And you don’t want them to know, right?_ ”

“Oh.” Keith said and hugged his knees to his chest with his free arm. “No, it’s… It’s fine. I guess? It’s not weird is it? They kind of know we're friends now. In a way. Right?” Lance smiled wide. “If that’s fine by you, I mean? I… Don’t know. I haven’t told Shiro anything really yet, so… I don’t know.”

“ _It’s okay, cariño._ ” Lance chuckled. Keith thought he could see Lance’s eyes shining a bit brighter. “ _Is that okay? That name, I mean._ ”

“Yeah… I like that.” Keith confessed and bit the insides of his own cheek again.

“ _It’s actually your contact name. Just to be safe, you know? In case anyone sees you texting me or something._ ” Lance said and Keith nodded. “ _Wait._ ” Lance muted his microphone again. Keith kept watching Lance’s face change from a smile to a frown and then a smile again. Keith’s heard was beating slightly faster since Lance had called him ‘cariño’ out loud. It sounded so intimate to hear that word coming out of Lance’s mouth. “ _I actually gotta go. Allura wants to talk to me while the rehearsal is going on. I’ll text you later?_ ”

“Yeah, it’s okay. Go be a rockstar.” Keith said and smiled. Lance laughed loudly. “Talk to you later, loverboy.” Lance winked at him, blew him a kiss and finished the call. Keith lied down on the sofa and closed his eyes, smiling as he heard Lance’s voice calling him ‘cariño’ still echoing in his head.

Waiting for the next day was hell. He wanted to see Lance again, talk to Lance in person about all of the stuff they talked online. Lance had spent the entire day texting Keith about anime because he was re watching Ouran High School Host Club and, apparently, had a huge crush on the character named Kiyoya.

Keith took the fastest shower of his life as soon as he got to his apartment after work and applied some light makeup before going to his room to get dressed. He wondered what to wear and started going through his stuff. Someone knocked on his door and he looked, finding Shiro frowning slightly and crossing his arms in front of his chest.

“You’re going out?” He asked and Keith nodded, smiling lightly. “Same guy?” Keith nodded again and grabbed two button up shirts from his wardrobe.

“Which one?” He asked Shiro, who hummed and entered the room, sitting on Keith’s bed, thinking about it. “I think I like this one better, but this other one can pass both as ‘hey, look, I’m fuckable’ and ‘I’m out with a friend and it’s no big deal’, right?”

“I… Don’t know?” Shiro frowned. “I thought you said you and this guy weren’t going to work out.”

“And we won’t.” Keith said and shrugged, deciding he should go with the first shirt, a plain black short sleeved button up with red buttons and a red pocket on the left side of the chest. “It’s complicated.”

“It’s the fifth time you’re going out with him, isn’t it? I thought it would’ve ended by now, but…” Shiro sighed. “I’m not sure I like that, to be honest.”

“You were all excited about when he gave me chocolates. What changed?” Keith frowned and got a pair of skinny black jeans from his wardrobe. Shiro shrugged.

“Last time you went out with him you changed. I don’t know what happened, but you seemed down afterwards and I don’t like that.” Shiro confessed. “Then you spent a long time without bringing him up or going out with him and now there’s…” Shiro stopped himself and sighed. “Anyway, I just think he might not be right for you.”

“You don’t even know who he is, Shiro.” Keith said, annoyed at Shiro’s sudden protective behaviour. It wasn't uncommon, but it wasn't always so... Invasive, maybe? Keith didn't know, but he didn't like it. “He’s a great guy and he’d never do anything to hurt me.”

“Then why are you not telling me about him?” Shiro said and crossed his arms. "Why are you hiding things from me, Keith?"

“I just…” Keith stopped and bit his lower lip for a second. “I can’t.” He admitted. “But that’s _me_ , not him. My choice. Just… Trust me, okay? It’s better this way.”

“Why are you still going out with him if you think nothing is coming out of it? There are other people out there. People who wouldn’t treat you like that, people who would be clear about their intentions, people who’d really like a chance.” Shiro said and Keith frowned harder.

“What are you talking about?” Keith questioned and Shiro’s eyes widened. "What does that even mean, Takashi?” Shiro sighed.

“It's nothing.” Shiro said and shook his head. “I’m just worried, that’s all.”

“No. Don’t lie to me. You know something, what do you know?” Keith walked up to Shiro.

“Everyone’s entitled to their own secrets.” Shiro said and it took Keith all of his willpower not to grab him by the collar. “Listen, I’m just worried about you, Keith, that’s all. You're my brother, I don’t want you getting hurt.”

“Sometimes good things can hurt.” Keith quoted Lance and chuckled lightly, taking that sentence absolutely out of its original context, but in a certain way he could understand it. Shiro hugged him. “I’m fine for now. If something happens, it’ll happen. But I’ll be fine. I promise. I'm a grown up, you know.” Shiro nodded. “Now I really have to finish getting ready because I don’t want to keep him waiting.”

“Call me if you need anything, okay?” Shiro let go of Keith and Keith smiled at him.

Keith finished getting ready and got all of his stuff, deciding that getting an Uber would be faster. Lance had texted him telling him to go straight inside when he arrived, so Keith did it. Nyma greeted him, smiling.

“Hello, Keith!” She hugged him and he awkwardly hugged her back. “Sorry to vanish on you two last time. Rolo and I headed home early because, you know… Alcohol and sex drive are a powerful combination.” She laughed. “Did you have fun?” Keith smiled at her and nodded. If they had gone home did that mean Lance stayed all alone at the club after he left? He hadn’t even thought about that, he had just left. Keith could feel guilt starting to creep up inside him, but he tried to shake it off. “Come on, I’ll take you to Lance.”

“He’s… Here already?” Keith asked and Nyma chuckled, nodding. Keith had gotten there twenty minutes early and Lance was already there.

They walked up to the private places until they got to the Rogue One themed one. It was the same cabin Lance had reserved the first time they had hung out together. Nyma left Keith near the cabin and Keith walked in by himself. Lance was looking incredible. He was sitting down, looking at his phone, and looked up when Keith cleaned his throat to catch Lance’s attention. Lance’s face lit up with a smile that took Keith’s breath away.

Lance stood up and walked up to Keith, grabbing the bouquet that was on top of the table and handing it to Keith. Keith was… confused, but he accepted it. Lance helped Keith sitting down and proceeded to sit down in front of him. Keith looked around and placed the flowers on a free spot he could reach near some action figures, carefully. Lance was wearing dark blue skinny jeans, dark brown moccasins, a white t-shirt with bright dark blue horizontal stripes and a black blazer. He looked breathtaking, Keith thought, resting his eyes on Lance's face.

“You look amazing.” Lance said after some seconds and Keith realised he had been staring at Lance’s lips for a while longer than he probably should have, so he looked away quickly, eyes fix on Lance's. Lance chuckled. “Rolo is coming with fries for us in a second, so you can order whatever you’d like to drink.”

“Thanks.” Keith smiled. “You look great too.”

“Allura helped me pick the outfit.” Lance beamed. “Don’t worry, she doesn’t know what for. She doesn’t know I’m out with you, she just knows I was going out with someone special, that’s all.” Keith tried not letting those words get over his head. Did Lance really consider him someone special or was that the excuse he had given Allura when he had asked for help? “I hope you like roses. I didn’t know. Neither did Pidge. And I couldn’t… ask Shiro, so.”

“They’re great, don’t worry.” Keith smiled at him and Lance nodded. “Did you pick them yourself?” Lance just nodded and Keith thought that was a sign not to question him any further; Lance was very communicative, so his silence meant a lot. But he was curious about why the roses were all white except for the one in the middle, the only red rose in the bouquet. Maybe he would question Lance about it some other time, if he thought he could. Or google it. Google would probably help him if there was an actual reason for it.

Rolo got there with their fries and chatted up with Keith and Lance for a while, before Keith tried his luck, asking Lance if he would like to share a wine. Lance hesitated, but agreed on it, so Rolo told them he’d bring the wine they picked in a few minutes.

Lance started asking Keith about his day, then talking about his own and the conversation changed to anime in a heartbeat.  That was nice, it was comfortable. They chatted about anime and Lance’s opinions on Ouran for a while, until they decided they were ready to order. They ordered a big dish of parmigiana chicken to share. The conversation resumed with Keith saying he thought Tamaki was annoying and Lance getting fake offended, stating that Tamaki was the character he identified with the most. Keith said his opinion wouldn’t change, Tamaki was annoying, but they managed to agree on the fact that Haruhi was a great character.

When the dish arrived, the wine did so too and Rolo served them. Lance thanked Rolo and Rolo wiggled his eyebrows, received a slap on his arm from Lance in return. Keith was slightly confused, but decided not to say anything about it. Lance proposed a toast and Keith just went on with it.

“For the future. Whatever it may be.” Lance said and smiled softly. Keith refrained from frowning at that.

“Whatever it may be.” He repeated, not very convinced he wanted to toast to his inevitable heartbreak, but doing so anyway. Lance seemed excited, so to hell with it. If it made Lance happy, he could take it.

“You okay?” Lance asked and Keith nodded, smiling faintly at him. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m just a bit tired.” Keith lied and Lance nodded. “What are you planning to binge watch after Ouran?”

Lance started listing his anime plans and they both started discussing Cowboy Bebop and its soundtrack. Keith let Lance talk for most part, as always, but tried to make as many comments as he could, not wanting Lance to think he wasn’t interested. He just couldn’t take those words from the toast from his head; whatever it may be. From day one Keith knew that wouldn’t last and, still, he let himself get involved. Maybe Shiro was right to worry. But it was unfair to think that way because Lance meant no harm. Sure thing he was weird and Keith was, for the most part, confused about Lance’s intentions; especially at the beginning. But then after the clubbing incident, Lance had asked Keith to forget that and everything was clear to Keith: he’d gotten too involved and had fucked up, but Lance liked his friendship enough not to want to let that get in the way.

And yet, there they were, having dinner together over a shared dish and wine; talking about their mutual interests and sharing about their lives. Lance had taken him a bouquet and had been calling him _cariño_ and Keith was confused once again. Confused and trying his best not to let that get over his own head because that was Lance. Lance was warm and really close to his friends. Keith knew Lance had given Pidge matching t-shirts and that he had, more than once, taken Hunk out on dinners. That was just Lance and Keith knew it. Lance would hold hands with Allura sometimes and jokingly flirt with all of his friends. It meant nothing and Keith couldn’t ruin everything again. He wouldn't ruin everything again.

They continued talking for a while after their food and wine were over, until Lance asked Rolo for the bill. Keith hesitated for a second about whether he would argue with Lance over the bill or not. When Rolo got back and Lance got the bill to pay, Rolo laughed.

“You’re not arguing over that anymore?” Rolo pointed out and Lance half glared at him. Keith shrugged.

“I don’t have a choice tonight.” Keith answered. “I either willingly let him do that or he has the right to make me let him do that.” Rolo frowned in confusion. “I lost a bet.”

“And he owes me a favour.” Lance explained. “But he doesn’t want me to waste the favour on something, and I’m quoting, stupid.”

“Wow.” Rolo laughed. “If you were smart you’d let him. Who knows what else Lance’s twisted mind will come up with.” Lance threw his napkin at Rolo. “What? Real friends warn their friends when they’re being foolish.”

“I’m not making Keith do anything he doesn’t want to.” Lance said and looked at Keith. "I'd never do that." He looked at Rolo and gave him some cash. “Keep the change, man.”

“Write down my words, dude.” Rolo got the cash and turned to Keith. “You’ll regret not letting Lance McClain spend the favour with this.” Keith narrowed his eyes. “But, hey, none of my business. I hope you two have a good night.” Keith nodded and Rolo left.

“So...” Lance said and Keith looked at him. Lance was staring at the table.

“Ice cream?” Keith offered and Lance looked up at him, smiling. “I’m paying.”

“But I’m paying for your Uber home afterwards.” Lance said and Keith shrugged. “Cool! Let’s go!”

The walk to the ice cream shop was relatively quiet. Lance was holding Keith’s free hand, since Keith was holding the bouquet with one of his hands. Lance was humming songs on their way there and Keith even dared to hum some with him. Lance got excited and told Keith to hum the melodies so he could do backing vocals and things of the sort.

Keith got himself a mix of chocolate and lemon pie ice cream with melted chocolate on top and gummi bears and worms. Lance got himself a mix of a bunch of flavours, the same toppings as Keith and a bottle of water. Keith paid and they sat down outside of the shop. They resumed the anime topic, discussing theories about Shingeki no Kyojin.

“Excuse me...” A small figure interrupted their conversation, blushing furiously. “I... Sorry... I’m Lilly... And I’m a big fan...” They were stuttering and stumbling on their own words. “Could I... A photo. Would that be okay? With you.” They were looking at Lance, who smiled and nodded. “Is it okay... If I hug you for it?”

“Yeah! Totally! Thanks for asking.” Lance smiled wider. “Is it okay if I hug you back?” Lilly nodded frantically and they took a selfie together.

“H-hi, I’m Lilly... You’re... Shiro’s brother, right?” They looked at Keith, who frowned slightly and nodded. “Sorry. Yeah. Thanks for the photo! It was nice meeting you two. Thanks.” They didn’t leave, looking down to the floor. “Could you... Give Shiro this... Letter?” They handed a folded piece of paper to Keith, who nodded again. “Thanks! You’re very... Sweet!”

“It’s okay.” Keith smiled at them and that made them blush even harder.

“Thanks again! I’m sorry again!” Lilly said, bowed their head slightly and left, muttering ‘oh my God’s under their breath.

“That was...” Keith frowned. “Weird.”

“They were very sweet!” Lance said, excited. “I love it when they ask if they can touch me instead of just going for it!” Keith hummed. “Sorry, I guess I’m too used to it. Are you okay?” Lance touched Keith’s hand.

“No, it’s fine. I’m actually surprised it doesn’t happen more often.” Keith admitted and Lance chuckled. “It’s just weird that they knew who I am.”

“Oh, that...” Lance frowned and retrieved his hand back, using it to scratch the back of his head. “Don’t be mad at me, please?” Keith frowned. “We kind of had a problem with Glossip when we weren’t talking properly... And I had to take care of it?”

“What do you mean?” Keith crossed his arms in front of his chest.

“Apparently someone got photos of us together and they were going to write an article about who is the mystery guy with me, but they sent it my way before doing so. Trying to get money, you know? Blackmail at its fines. And I... I told them it was nothing and they dug deeper and found out about your connection with Shiro and I bribed them not to write the article, but they slipped that information somewhere anyway. So now people kind of... Know that you exist?” Lance wasn’t looking at Keith and Keith sighed. He knew it was just a matter of time before people found out about him and Shiro. “At least they didn’t write about us or published the photos, right?” Keith hummed.

“You need to stop thinking I’ll be mad at you for everything, you know.” Keith said and Lance looked up at him, biting his lower lip. “I’m sorry if I’ve been giving you that impression. I don’t think there’s something you can do that will make me angry.”

“That’s not true...” Lance said in a low tone.

“Even if it isn’t, I won’t get mad at you for things like this. It’s just like at the Unplugged session. I still have no idea why you thought I’d be mad at you for singing that song.” Keith admitted and Lance opened his mouth for a second, then closed it. Keith waited, just in case Lance wanted to say anything, but resumed talking after some time. “Let’s make a deal: if I’m angry at you or whatever, I’ll talk to you. If I ever need time or space or whatever I’ll do that too, but you have to promise you’ll do the same.” Keith smiled fondly at Lance and Lance smiled back, nodding. “Good.”

“Thanks, Keith.” Lance smiled wider. “Sorry I didn’t tell you before. The timing was bad and we were... Weird, I guess?”

“It’s fine, really.” Keith shrugged. “I mean, me and Shiro being brothers, kinda, was bound to come out eventually. I just thought it would be made more of a big deal from it because it’s kind of a dramatic story and these gossip magazines _love_ a drama.” Lance hummed. “You took care of it, didn’t you?” Lance looked down and nodded. “I’m not mad. I just... Would prefer if you didn’t do that type of thing.”

“I just don’t get why.” Lance said and looked up, into Keith’s eyes, frowning slightly. “I can do it, I have the means to and the news came my way first, so I did it. I don’t like it, I really don’t, but I wanted to protect you.” Lance stopped for a second. “All of you. I want to protect all of you.”

“I know. And I’m not angry or upset about it.” Keith sighed. “I just wish you’d understand I feel _really_ uncomfortable with you wanting to pay me things and all things money involved. And it’s not just you, I hate it when Shiro does that equally. It’s just the way I am.”

“You should let people take care of you more, though.” Lance said, careful. Keith could hear Lance’s worries through his voice. “Sorry, I’m overstepping my boundaries here, right?”

“I mean... We’re friends. Right?” Keith managed to smile a bit and Lance’s eyes widened just slightly, but enough for Keith to realise and he nodded frantically. “So it’s okay, I suppose. To have opinions and share them.”

“I’m not saying there’s something wrong with being the way you are. It just gets frustrating for those who want to take care of you, that’s all.” Lance shrugged and Keith nodded. “Anyway, that’s not a really cool topic, is it?” Lance chuckled. “Have I told you I’m watching a new TV show?” Lance changed topics quickly and Keith just went with it.

As much as he didn’t mind discussing more serious things, if Lance didn’t feel comfortable or didn’t want to at the time he’d respect that. So they started talking about Gilmore Girls, which was a stupid show, in Keith’s opinion, but Lance was so happy talking about it that he just let him. They spent some time discussing the show and Lance told Keith about all of the characters, one by one and why he loved Lorelai so much, but had his doubts about whether he liked Rory. He went on a full-on rant about Rory’s boyfriends and told Keith he wasn’t looking forward to having Rory’s second relationship end because he _really_ liked Jess. Keith understood nothing, but nodded and listened.

The rest of the night consisted in Lance talking about random things and slipping compliments about Keith in some moments, to which Keith had no idea how to react. Keith would let them slide most of the time and some others just nod. He did manage to tell Lance he was looking good and that he could hear Lance talking for ages, but that was about it. Keith was bad at that and he didn’t know how to react to Lance being smooth with him; he felt like it would be rude to flip Lance off, even _if_ the flirting was a joke. Flipping him off when he flirted jokingly, but in a clear and open way was one thing, but when he was being smooth and loving... When it didn't really feel like a complete joke... Keith felt like that would be wrong and hurtful. But he really didn’t know how to react.

On their way to Keith’s building, Lance left some space between them in the car at first and that make Keith uncomfortable, but he didn't do anything to change it at first, trying to respect Lance's boundaries and limits. Lance slowly grabbed Keith’s hand and Keith instinctively slipped closer to him as he hummed the melodies of the song playing on the radio. Keith let himself be embraced by Lance and tried steadying his own heart, not being very successful at it. But it didn’t matter; not when Lance’s breathing was unsteady too and his lips were on Keith’s hair. Not when Lance would hug Keith tighter whenever he took a deeper breath. When they got to Keith’s place, Lance asked the driver to wait while he followed Keith to the entrance of the building.

“Thanks for tonight.” Lance held Keith’s free hand. “I hope you had fun...” Keith nodded and smiled. “I was wondering if you’d like to go over to my place for a movie and music session again any time soon.” Lance asked.

“Yeah, that would be great.” Keith smiled faintly. His heart was beating faster than what was probably healthy. “I was searching prices of keyboards this week. That day made me miss playing.”

“You can come over to play whenever, though. And playing a piano is way more satisfying than a keyboard, right?” Lance chuckled and Keith thought, for a second, that maybe Lance was nervous. What would be Lance nervous about?

“I’m not going to go to your apartment every time I feel like playing, Lance.” Keith chuckled. “I know you’ll say I can, but I won’t. It’s fine.” Lance nodded and bit his lower lip. “Are you okay?”

“Can I hug you?” Lance asked and Keith frowned, pulling him closer, hugging as tightly as he could and being extra careful not to ruin the flowers. “Keith...” Lance said in a whisper and held him even tighter, Keith hummed. “Thanks.” Lance said and Keith nodded, letting go of him after a while. “We’ll talk properly about next time. I’ve kept John waiting for long enough.” Lance said, referring to the Uber driver, and chuckled. “See ya.”

“Text me when you’re home.” Keith asked and Lance’s face lit up. He smiled and nodded. Keith waved him a goodbye and Lance chuckled, waving back before turning around and getting back inside the car.

Keith was holding the flowers way tighter than he probably should, but something inside of him felt like it was about to burst. He couldn’t stop thinking about how Lance’s face had lit up and about how Lance had told him he should let people take care of him. Keith felt something warm inside of him and he knew it was a bad, bad feeling. But it felt so good. It would bite him hard on the butt eventually, but he had tried dealing with their relationship based on “I”ll cross that bridge when I get to it” from the start – even though he hadn’t managed sometimes –, he wasn’t planning on letting that go to absolute shit now.

He found Shiro roaming in the kitchen when he got to the apartment. Keith got a bowl that could fit all of the flowers in, filled it with water and put the roses in the bowl. Shiro watched him, arms crossed and eyes that Keith _knew_ were judgemental. And Keith _really_ didn’t want to deal with that, but avoiding Shiro wouldn’t be a good thing. Keith sighed.

“He bought you flowers?” Shiro questioned and Keith had to hold back a groan. He just nodded in response. “How was the date?”

“I told you, they’re not dates.” Keith answered and Shiro sighed. “I don’t think…”

“Keith, I know you don’t want to talk about it with me, but have you discussed it with _him_?” Shiro questioned again and Keith put the flowers on top of their kitchen table. “You’ve been going out for months now, from what you told me before you talk a lot, he’s bought you chocolate before and flowers now, but you keep saying they’re not dates. Have you asked him about his intentions with you?”

“No.” Keith admitted. “I can’t do that, Shiro. I don't...” Keith clenched his jaw. He didn’t want to hear Lance saying they were just friends, he didn’t want to ruin everything again like he almost did the time they went clubbing. He didn’t want to lose Lance. He would, eventually, and he knew that, but he didn’t want to. “I just can’t. And I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Keith…”Shiro’s tone was softer and Keith realised he was barely breathing, his hands had turned into fists and he was shaking slightly. “I’ll stop pressuring you, but I’m worried. We’re worried.”

“We?” Keith looked up at him, frowning. “Who’s _we_?”

“Matt and I.” Shiro sighed. “I had to talk to someone. You wouldn’t talk to me. And Matt noticed some things too. Not about you, but… I can’t go into details…” Shiro sighed again. “We’re worried.”

“I guess we both can have our share of secrets.” Keith tried relaxing his muscles. Shiro meant well and Keith knew it. IT was a pain in the ass sometimes, but he knew it. “But don’t worry about me. I’m fine for now. And when I’m not…” Keith chuckled, he was very screwed. “When that happens, we’ll talk about it.” Shiro sighed and reach over to Keith’s shoulder.

“I’m here.” Shiro said and Keith nodded.

"Someone asked me to give you this." Keith handed Shiro the letter. "Apparently _Glossip_ let out that we're brothers. A fan recognised me and asked me if I could hand you this letter." Shiro caught it from Keith's hand and nodded.

"Are you okay with it? IS it happening regularly?" He asked and Keith chuckled, smiling reassuringly at his brother and shaking his head. "Let me know if it becomes a problem."

"Will do." Keith answered. Shiro went to his own room and Keith followed his steps, planning to get ready to sleep.

As he lied down on his pillow after having finished his night routine, he decided to check his phone. He had unread messages from Lance, but he decided to play _The Walking Dead: No Man’s Land_ first for a while. Shiro was right and Keith knew Shiro was right, but he didn’t want to face it. He was scared of knowing the answer. Because Lance made him very confused.

Sometimes it seemed like Lance was actually flirting and other times it seemed like Lance was staring at Keith’s lips. But then the club happened and Keith couldn’t think of another reason for Lance to be hurt. He had sucked Lance off and Lance had changed. So maybe he had gotten all of Lance’s signs wrong. That was the only explanation. And then Lance had asked him to pretend the club had never happened, right? So that had been the problem. Keith had gotten Lance all wrong. Maybe it was normal for Lance to give his friends stuff. And Keith posted photos of flowers on his Instagram stories sometimes, so maybe that’s where Lance had picked up that he liked flowers? That was probably it. Wasn’t it?

Keith decided he should answer Lance’s text before things got weird. Lance had sent him his customary night selfie with Pulpsy and Keith couldn’t help himself from smiling like a stupid kid while looking at it.

 **Sharpshooter <3: I’m home and safe**  
**Sharpshooter <3: thanks for tonight, I had a lot of fun, as always**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: I always have fun around u <3 **  
**Sharpshooter <3: when are u free again?**  
 **Keith: Next Saturday.**  
 **Keith: I had fun too.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: wanna come over next friday then???? and u can sleep over if u want to**  
 **Keith: Sure.**  
 **Keith: I’ll have to talk to Shiro first, though.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: cool !!!!!**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: r u telling him?**  
 **Keith: No.**  
 **Keith: We’re having some trouble around here, that’s all. So I’m gonna have to talk him through me spending the night there.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: wanna talk about it?**  
 **Keith: It’s okay, don’t worry. He’s not very happy with me keeping secrets from him, that’s all.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: I feel that :/ Allura was giving me shit too a while ago**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: sucks but**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: it be like that sometimes, I guess**  
 **Keith: Yeah.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: Friday at 7pm here, deal?**  
 **Keith: Deal.**  
 **Keith: I’m gonna hit the bed now. Night, Lance. Talk to you tomorrow.**  
 **Sharpshooter <3: talk to u tomorrow, cariño <3**

Keith sighed. It was fine. He was okay. No matter how weird things got, no matter how confused he was, no matter how much he did not understand Lance at all, he was okay. As long as he had Lance’s friendship he was okay. Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooooo..... we still have 2 official chapters to go and then an epilogue (chapter 13). as i was writing this fic back in july/august, i wasn't planning for it to be angsty like it turned out, but i'm too into angst and it's very heard for me to write happy stuff, so there is THAT ldsfapkdflsd i'm so so so sorry about it.
> 
> i honestly hope y'all are liking this, though. there's still a lot to happen in the next 2 chapters. next chapter will actually be from lance's pov, so there is that for a change. we'll get to see his side of the story for a bit too. i'm very anxious about it, but....  
> i'm also working on another fic already (working on as in writing it) and it'll be a ghost AU, so there's that to look forward to, i suppose, if you liked my writing. and i'm planning an electra heart!lance AU too for the future, as well as a few oneshots, so. these are my plans for now. i'm rambling, sorry.
> 
> if you wanna talk to me outside of ao3 world, this is my [my les mis blog](https://whensunscollide.tumblr.com) and this is my [my "main" blog](https://marsisnotcreative.tumblr.com) ; this is my [main twitter account](https://twitter.com/playlandi) and this is my [mostly fandom twitter acc](https://twitter.com/thenotesaresour). i have a [youtube channel](https://youtube.com/marsisnotcreative) too. and i have two instagrams, one is my [main/professional account](https://instagram.com/playlandi) and one is my [cosplay/fandom account](https://instagram.com/enjolmars) . so these are all my social media, i guess. come say hi. send me prompts. i'd love that <3
> 
> in case you're able to and you'd like to, feel free to buy me a metaphorical coffee on [ko-fi.com/playlandi](https://ko-fi.com/playlandi) and feel free to send me prompts and all there too, if you'd like (of course, if you send them via any other place, they'll be just as welcome!)
> 
> i'm talking a lot and there's a lot of links, so i'll just leave the link to the [full playlist, on spotify,](https://open.spotify.com/user/playlandi/playlist/2vr6vymACCES9lHyLx2Qf4?si=XlmFxYmISimyOxHSnCKHxA) i made for the fic and i'll go. thanks for reading. see ya in the next chapter <3


	11. Before you leave stay here and lay here right in my arms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith goes over to Lance's so they can have dinner together. Lances POV.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so,,,,, final season on december 14, huh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, sup with tHAT ma dudes
> 
> the name of the chapter comes from........... shawn mendes' (look i'm not even sorry anymore at this point slakjfldçkjfds) "act like you love me" (listen i was sad and shawn mendes-ing when i wrote this jdskajdfs)
> 
> THANK YOU FOR ALL THE COMMENTS AND KUDOS AND FOR THE ASK SOMEONE SENT ME ON TUMBLR ??? honestly the response to the fic has been overwhelmingly positive, i am so so happy people are ??? reading this ??? lçdsapoçjfd and LIKING IT ??? incredible. absolutely surreal.
> 
> we've got one more chapter to go and an epilogue, after this one. so LET'S DO THIS!  
> (LANCE'S POV IN THIS CHAPTER) (sorry it got kinda longer than the usual, i think ??? çlsdfjçaldfsj)  
> also, very important: i love lotor. i really do. but he's an asshole in this story. don't hate me for it.

Lance could barely focus on his tasks the entire week. He was so lucky to have met Keith and he had to make sure he would make things right, he had to make sure he wouldn’t screw everything up again. He’d done it before, he’d hurt people before. And he’d hurt Keith before. The days he had spent without talking properly to Keith had been the worst days he’d had ever since Keith had gotten into his life. He was lucky and he couldn’t fuck it up.

He was lucky Pidge knew about it too because there was no way Lance would’ve managed to survive without talking about that with _someone_. And as much as he loved Rolo and Nyma, those two had met Lance in another moment of his life. Pidge _knew_ Lance. They knew Lance enough to realise Lance was anxious without him having to say a word; they knew Lance enough to know when Lance needed a hug or a punch on the jaw. Lance was lucky.

Not being able to tell Hunk and Allura about Keith was hard and Lance felt awful for it, but Keith didn’t want anyone to know and Lance didn’t want to risk doing something that could push Keith away from him. So he would wait. Even if it hurt him a bit; he would wait until Keith was ready.

Sometimes it was hard to understand Keith. Sometimes he was too mysterious and closed on his own world and Lance didn’t want to intrude, he didn’t want to pressure Keith into talking. So he would try his best not to overstep Keith’s boundaries again. It was hard since he couldn’t be completely sure that Keith felt the same as he did, but… It seemed like Keith did, right? He wouldn’t be keeping them a secret otherwise, right? Or maybe he would. Maybe he was keeping them a secret exactly because he had no intentions of actually havivg something with Lance and he knew that the repercussions of him just playing Lance would be ugly.

But Lance could pretend he hadn’t let himself get involved too. He could do that for Keith. He could do almost anything for Keith. He would. No one needed to know. Pidge would because Pidge already did, but Lance could try convincing them that it was fine, that he was fine. He had to stop thinking about that, though, because Allura was staring at him in a weird way.

Lance got back from his thoughts and smiled at Allura, who was frowning slightly. He tried paying attention to whatever Hunk was saying about the song he was composing, but Lance had missed the entire first half of the conversation, so he had no idea what Hunk was talking about.

“You know that if you’re not feeling well you can just tell us, right?” Lance heard Allura’s voice very near him. He looked up at her and smiled.

“I’m fine. I was just thinking about something, sorry.” Lance chuckled. “I’m here now. Sorry.” Hunk sighed and Lance turned to face him.

“You okay, bro? Wanna take a break?” Hunk asked and Lance frowned for a second. “I’m a bit tired too, so it would be cool. Maybe we could get something to eat.” Hunk looked at Matt, who was already hyped with the idea. Hunk chucked. “Okay, then. I’ll continue after the break and maybe Lance can show us the new song _he_ ’s been working on.”

“Yeah, sure, that’d be cool.” Lance smiled. Allura sat next to him and he rested his head on her shoulder. “I’m fine, Lura.”

“I really don’t like it when you lie to me.” Allura said, in a scolding tone. “Has he tried to contact you?” She asked. “Lotor.”

“Oh.” Lance chuckled. “No, not again. Not after the tour he didn’t. I think Shiro made things very clear to him.” Lance chuckled again. “Why do you ask?”

“You had that look on your face.” Allura took one of her hands to Lance’s hair. “Have you considered meeting with that therapist we talked about.” Lance shook his head. “You know you can talk to me, right?”

“I know. I’m fine, Lura, seriously. I was just overthinking. You know how my brain works.” Lance shrugged and Allura hummed. “I’m honestly fine.”

“How was your date?” Allura asked and Lance sat straight up, muscles tensing. “That’s what you asked my help with, right? For the outfit. A date.”

“Oh, yeah. It was fine.” Lance chuckled.

“You went out on a date?” Pidge asked and raised an eyebrow. Lance glared at them. “I thought it wasn’t a _date_.”

“It was… Kind of a date?” Lance said, uncertain of his answer, but certain that he was going to murder a goblin in their sleep. “Doesn’t matter, it was nice.”

“Can you please explain to me the concept of a ‘kind of a date’?” Pidge pressured Lance and Lance grabbed the nearest pillow to throw at them, hitting them on the face.

“I’d love to know that too.” Shiro said and Lance’s muscles tensed even more. He was entering danger zone again and that was bad; that was very bad. He hated Pidge, he hated Pidge so much. Shiro sighed and sat down near Lance. “Keith’s been going on some of those too and…” Shiro stopped himself. “I shouldn’t be saying that. Sorry.”

“No, it’s okay.” Pidge said and Lance was _definitely_ going to kill them. “If you started talking about it, it means you need to get it out of your system. Besides, all of us are great with keeping secrets, right?” Pidge looked at Lance and raised an eyebrow. Lance narrowed his eyes, but nodded. Allura agreed.

“It’s the same thing I mentioned a while ago. Keith’s been acting weird, he’s been keeping secrets and he’s been seeing someone for a while, like I mentioned before, but…” Shiro sighed and looked at Lance for a second, as if he was trying to see something in Lance and that made Lance worry for a second before Shiro looked away. “I don’t think that guy is right for Keith, that’s all.”

“Maybe you’re just worrying too much, you know.” Lance started talking and regretted immediately, feeling all of the eyes on him. “Maybe this guy actually likes Keith; maybe he wants to be good for him.”

“Why would Keith keep it a secret then?” Allura said and Lance had to stop himself from clenching his jaw.

“Maybe he has his own reasons.” Lance said, voice weaker. “I don’t know Keith enough to be sure, but I do know that he’s a responsible and independent guy and if someone hurt him, he’d probably kick their butt.” Shiro chuckled and nodded.

“But why are you worried exactly, Shiro?” Pidge asked and Lance looked at them. “You’ve kept it a secret from him that you were with us for a while and it didn’t mean it was a bad thing. Secrets aren’t necessarily bad. So what makes you worry so much?”

“He seems to be awfully sure this thing will end badly. He keeps bringing things home that this guy takes him, but he still insists they aren’t dates. And I know Keith is strong and independent, but he’s never had a boyfriend or anything of the sort. He’s kissed guys before and went on one or two dates, but nothing more than that.” Shiro sighed. “I’m scared he’s getting too involved with someone who’s just using him or something.”

“I don’t think that’s the case.” Allura spoke up. “Maybe Keith is the one who’s not involved enough and maybe he doesn’t want to tell you because he doesn’t want you to know about something he’s planning to end eventually. Maybe Keith is being selfish.”

“That’s not true.” Pidge spoke up. “Keith wouldn’t do that.” They looked at Lance for an instant and Lance nodded. He didn’t like that conversation at all. He didn’t like Shiro speculating about him and Shiro disliking him – even though Shiro didn’t know it was him. And he didn’t like Allura saying all of his deepest fears aloud like that. “In my humble opinion, maybe they’re just two dumb people who don’t know how to deal with a  relationship properly.”

“Keith did mention he never asked about the guy’s intentions. It feels like they have never even talked about what’s going on between them…” Shiro said and nodded. “Ayway, this is… A lot. And Keith wouldn’t like me discussing his personal life like that. Thank you, though.” Pidge nodded.

“Shiro.” Lance said and sighed. Shiro looked at him. “Keith is strong. He’s not going to let someone break his heart that easily.”

“And if someone does we can all collectively kick his ass.” Pidge said and Lance agreed, nodding.

Shiro changed the topic, talking about food, and Lance was glad he did so. The rest of the day was hell because Lance felt observed and anxious. He tried really hard to focus, but it was _very_ challenging for him, especially after that conversation. He texted Keith, asking him if he was free to facetime, as soon as he got home and put on a chapter of Gilmore Girls, as he waited for Keith to respond. It took Keith about two episodes to do so.

 **cariño** **< 3** **: I just got home, I’m going to talk to Shiro about Friday and then we can facetime.  
lance: can’t we facetime first?  
****cariño** **< 3** **: Is something wrong?  
lance: no  
lance: it’s fine, talk to him  
****cariño** **< 3** **: I’ll let you know when I’m free, okay?**  
**lance: k**

Lance didn’t manage to pay attention to the show anymore, so he paused it and turned the light on, hugging his knees to his chest. Was Shiro going to tell Keith about the conversation they had that afternoon? Was Keith going to be mad at Lance? Lance decided to call Pidge.

“ _Missing me already?_ ” Pidge picked up the facetime call almost immediately. “ _Or are you going to threaten my life?_ ”

“Awn, you know me so well, it’s endearing, Pidgeotto.” Lance chuckled. “Keith’s coming over on Friday and he’s going to talk about it with Shiro right now.”

“ _I’m guessing by earlier on that he didn’t tell Shiro yet. And that you two clowns haven’t talked about whatever it is you have going on._ ” Pidge said and Lance hummed. “ _You two_ need _to talk, Lance. You know that, right?_ ”

“I know.” Lance sighed. “We’re going to. I’m cooking him dinner and he’s sleeping over and we’ll talk about things. That’s my plan for Friday night, at least.” Lance bit his lower lip for a moment and Pidge sighed. “I’m telling him about Lotor.”

“ _You really like him, don’t you?_ ” Pidge sighed again. Lance nodded. “ _Call me if you need anything, but please be very clear with him about everything, okay? You heard Shiro. Keith never did relationships before._ ”

“You know way more than you tell me, right? ‘Cause you know his side too…” Lance pointed out. “It would be way easier if you told me what he’s thinking, you know?”

“ _It would. And it would also be betrayal. Keith trusts me and I’m not letting him down._ ” Pidge shrugged. “ _As much as I love both of you, I’m not meddling any more than necessary._ ” They adjusted their glasses and Lance nodded. “ _Just talk to him._ ”

“I’m going to. Friday.” Lance nodded. “Thanks for defending Keith earlier on. I don’t get why Allura thinks poorly of him, but…” Lance sighed.

“ _You don’t?_ ” Pidge adjusted their glassed. “ _So I gather you two haven’t talked about it yet_.” Pidge sighed. “ _Why am I the most responsible one out of our group of friends? I should make a Power Point presentation about communication for yall._ ”

“What are you talking about?” Lance frowned.

“ _Allura knows, Lance._ ” Pidge explained. Oh no. “ _You were drunk and you told her, apparently._ ” Lance opened his mouth to speak, but he didn’t know what to say. Pidge sighed. “ _She didn’t tell anyone. She was going to, but I stopped her. She was very worked up about it and I asked her if something was wrong and she spilled the beans right there and I was_ shook _. But I asked her not to tell Shiro, which was her original plan, because I knew and I had everything under control. I was watching you two closely._ ”

“What did I tell her?” Lance wasn’t sure he wanted to know the answer. Keith was going to kill him, wasn’t he? He had betrayed Keith’s confidence and he didn’t even remember that. “Oh my God, Keith’s going to be so angry with me. He doesn’t want people to know, Pidge.” Pidge sighed.

“ _You told her you were seeing someone and that he was the best, the cutest, all of that regular Lance-in-love talk and then you told her she couldn’t tell anyone because it was your ‘_ dirty little secret _’ and Keith didn’t want anyone to know about it._ ” Pidge explained and Lance groaned. He was such a dumbass and he hated himself for it. “ _Hey, the good news is that you didn’t cry. Last time you talked about Keith with me while you were drunk you cried._ ”

“Shut up, Pidgeon.” Lance said and closed his eyes for a second. “I’m so fucking stupid.”

“ _Agreed. For different reasons, though._ ” Lance opened his eyes “ _Look, Hunk’s calling me in the kitchen and tonight is date night, so I don’t want to keep him waiting. Talk to Keith on Friday. But promise me one thing. No matter what happens, you’ll give Keith an ultimatum._ ”

“What do you mean?” Lance frowned for a second.

“ _You’re not hiding this anymore. And the first person you’ll tell is Hunk. He knows something is up and he’s your_ best friend _, Lance. He’s worried about you and he thinks it’s Lotor related, so he’s trying to give you space, but…_ ” Pidge sighed. “ _Tell Keith you’re not hiding it anymore. This whole thing’s been hurting you, Lance. And I know Keith doesn’t want to hurt you and you don’t want to hurt him, but you both are and if you don’t talk to him this Friday I’m telling Hunk myself._ ” Pidge adjusted their glasses and Lance heard Hunk’s voice getting closer. “ _And Shiro too._ ” Lance nodded. “ _Gotta go. Talk to you later, loverboy._ ” Lance heard hunk asking Pidge who they were talking to before Pidge ended the call.

He didn’t want to admit it, but he knew Pidge was right. Lance couldn’t keep things a secret anymore. It made him anxious about Keith’s motives, it made him anxious that Shiro would find out and hate him forever, it made him anxious that he would let it slip at some point – and, apparently, he had; because Allura knew. He wondered if he should talk to Allura about it, but decided against it. He needed to talk to Keith first. And he planned on doing so soon, so that was fine. He could wait a bit more.

Keith texted Lance after a while, saying he was free, so Lance called him.

“Hi.” Lance said as soon as Keith picked up. Keith’s eyes were red and his breathing unsteady; Lance frowned. “Are you okay?”

“ _Shiro and I fought._ ” Keith said and Lance’s chest hurt. “ _He’s convinced that ‘_ mystery guy _’ is using me and he’s strongly against me going over on Friday._ ” Keith bit his lowerlip. “ _Sorry, I shouldn’t be telling_ you _that._ ” Lance shook his head.

“It’s okay, Keith, you can talk to me.” Lance smiled at him faintly.

“ _What did you want to talk about?_ ” Keith asked and Lance sighed.

“Don’t you think it’s time to tell him?” Lance risked asking, but regretted as soon as Keith’s expression turned into a frown.

“ _I don’t want to talk about this._ ” Keith said and Lance sighed again. “ _I’m telling him eventually. But not right now._ ”

“Keith…” Lance started saying.

“ _I said I don’t want to talk about this, Lance._ ” Keith’s voice was a bit louder and Lance winced just from hearing it. Lance looked down, away from the screen and nodded. “ _Sorry. I just…_ ” Keith sighed. “ _I’m not mad at you, okay? I just…_ ”

“It’s okay.” Lance tried smiling, but couldn’t look back at Keith because he _knew_ he wasn’t managing. “Shiro talked about you today. About… Me. Mystery guy.” Lance started saying. Keith had the right to know. “He… Doesn’t like me a lot.” He chuckled. “And he doesn’t know it’s me he was talking about, so that was awkward.”

“ _What did he say?_ ” Keith asked and Lance closed his eyes.

“Can we… Talk about this on Friday?” Lance could feel himself getting sad and he didn’t want Keith to see that through facetime. “I’ll tell you everything, but.. I guess I’m just tired.”

“ _Sure._ ” Keith answered. Lance opened his eyes and looked to the screen. Keith’s eyes were closed too; he was biting his lower lip hard and Lance thought he looked sad. He didn’t want Keith to be sad. “ _I think I want to go to bed, if it’s fine._ ”

“Sure.” Lance answered and Keith opened his eyes. “Night, Keith. Call me if you need anything, okay?” Keith nodded. They waited for a second and Keith ended the call. Lance closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. Maybe he should go to bed too.

He got ready to sleep and checked his phone before trying to fall asleep. Keith had texted him.

 **cariño** **< 3** **: Night, Lance. Sorry to upset you.**  
**lance: it’s okay**  
 **lance: u didn’t upset me, kay?**  
**lance: sleep tight**

The rest of the week was relatively okay. Lance was still finding it hard to focus, but Pidge was closer to him and helped keeping him grounded. He was honestly terrified of Friday. He didn’t want to confront Keith, he didn’t want to risk ruining everything. He could pretend he had, tell Pidge they had agreed on telling everyone in a few weeks and keep postponing that conversation until Pidge figured his plan and told everyone. But that wasn’t right.

It wasn’t right to keep lying. It wasn’t right to keep worrying Shiro. It wasn’t right to keep second guessing his every move, terrified that he would do something wrong and Keith would stop talking to him. He was going to talk to Keith. He just had to set his mind to it and psyche himself up for whatever happened when he did.

Lance made them spaghetti with tomato sauce for dinner. It wasn’t the most romantic meal in the world, but Keith liked it and that was the most important thing. He lit some candles in the dining room, not too many, but enough just to set a more romantic mood. When Keith got to his apartment, he led Keith to his room, so Keith could put his bag there, and then took him to the dining room. Lance had put their plates in front of each other; he helped Keith sitting down and asked him to wait while Lance got the food. When he got back, Keith was on his phone, but quickly set it aside when Lance put the spaghetti in front of Keith.

“You cooked for us.” Keith pointed out and blushed slightly. Lance nodded.

“I’m not a chef, so I went for something simple.” Lance chuckled. “I hope you like it, though. I haven’t cooked in ages.” Lance admitted and served Keith before serving himself. “What do you want to drink?” Keith shrugged. “I have water, juice, tea, beer, wine…”

“Wine seems nice, I think?” Keith said and looked down at his plate. “If you want to.”

“Yeah. It sounds great, I’ll get us some, be right back.” He left and got them two glasses and a bottle of wine. Lance served their glasses before sitting down in front of Keith. “So, how was your week?” He started talking.

Keith started telling Lance about some funny stories about weird customers from the café he worked at. Lance loved hearing Keith talk about his daily life; to be honest, Lance loved hearing Keith talking about anything, really. So whenever Keith said anything Lance paid close attention; especially because Keith wasn’t intense on sharing everything about his life like Lance was. And it was fine. It made the moments he did even more special.

They talked about Keith’s work over dinner and then started talking about the fact that Lance had gotten to a part of Gilmore Girls that he wasn’t happy with. Talking about Gilmore Girls meant Keith listening and Lance talking, so Lance tried being quick, but whenever he tried changing subjects Keith would ask something about what he was saying and he would go back to ranting about the show. Lance knew when Keith played him like that and he always let Keith. He had learnt to pick up on when Keith was avoiding a certain subject or trying to conduct the conversation.

He had learnt that Keith did that almost every time they started talking about The Paladins or Shiro and the way he did it followed a certain pattern, so Lance had learnt how to notice what Keith was doing it.

As they finished eating, Keith offered Lance help to clean the dishes and Lance insisted he would do it alone. Keith agreed after some convincing, but he stayed with Lance in the kitchen as he did it, still talking about Gilmore Girls. Once Lance was done he asked Keith if he wanted desert.

“There’s this Brazilian sweet called brigadeiro that is made with chocolate and it’s really good. I could make us some.” Lance said and Keith hesitated.

“Maybe later?” Keith said. “Unless you want to now. Then that’s okay.”

“No, I’m good. Later it is.” Lance smiled and tapped on Keith’s shoulder. “Wanna watch something or play a little?”

“Do you want to show me Gilmore Girls?” Keith asked and Lance could feel his smile getting wider. “You like it a lot, so I figured I could give it a shot.” Lance nodded and they walked to the home theatre room while Lance was talking excitedly about how he hoped Keith liked it, but it was okay if he didn’t.

Lance put the first episode on Netflix and sat down. Keith immediately got closer to Lance, so Lance put his arm around Keith’s shoulder and held him as he rested his head on Lance’s chest. Lance was glad Keith was on his right side and probably couldn’t hear how fast his heart was beating. As smooth as Lance tried to act around Keith, he always got nervous. He knew he was being extremely lucky to be able to have that with Keith.

By the end of the first episode, Keith was hugging Lance in a weird way and Lance kissed the top of Keith’s head.

“So?” Lance asked, a bit anxious.

“Not my cup of tea.” Keith said and chuckled. “But at least I can say that I tried, right?”

“It’s not for everyone, I guess.” Lance chuckled too. “I have Gilmore Girls and you have The Walking Dead.”

“Yes, but The Walking Dead is an objectively bad show. I just find it entertaining. You actually think Gilmore Girls is a good show.” Keith argued.

They started talking about how wrong Keith was and, in the middle of their argument, they decided to put their pyjamas on and move to Lance’s bedroom, so they could talk in bed and be ready in case anyone got too tired. Lance was hugging Keith again; Keith’s head was resting on Lance’s chest.

“You said you’d tell me what Shiro said.” Keith went straight into the subject after a pause that lasted a little too long in Lance’s speech and Lance sighed.

“I did.” Lance said and started playing with Keith’s hair. “He’s scared that I’m going to hurt you.” Lance said and Keith hummed, but didn’t say anything. Lance didn’t know what to make out of that answer. “Allura thinks you’re keeping it a secret because you’re just…” Lance swallowed hard and hesitated for a second. “Using me.”

“What does that mean?” Keith asked and Lance could hear some suspicion in his voice.

“She said maybe you’re not telling Shiro who mystery guy is because you’re just having your fun with him, so you don’t want to involve Shiro in it. That you’re being selfish…” Lance closed his eyes and bit his lower lip. Keith just hummed again. “Pidge defended you, though. They said you’d never do that.”

“What did you say?” Keith asked.

“That you’re capable of handling yourself, as far as I know. And that he shouldn’t worry because you must have your own reasons for not telling him.” Lance said, consciously choosing to hide the part in which he said that ‘maybe the guy really likes Keith’. They would get to it later that night or the next day, he didn’t want to rush into that specific conversation. Keith hummed again. “Wanna talk about why you two fought?”

“Shiro said things that…” Keith sighed. “He’s probably right about some stuff he’s thinking.” Lance frowned and held Keith closer. “I don’t know. I don’t want to talk about this with you.” Keith said and paused for a second. “Not right now, at least.”

“Okay…” Lance sighed. It wasn’t okay, but he didn’t want to force things out of Keith. “I just want you to know I trust you.”

“Thanks, Lance.” Keith hugged him tighter. “Who else was there? For that talk, I mean…”

“Just us. Shiro, Allura, Pidge and I.” Lance said and kissed the top of Keith’s head.

“And how did it start?” Keith questioned and Lance thought it was odd, but didn’t point it out.

“I wasn’t very focused on what we were doing and Allura thought it had something to do with…” Lance hesitated for a second. “With Lotor.” He said and waited, in case Keith wanted to question him about it. Keith didn’t. “I told her it wasn’t and Hunk asked if we wanted to take a break, one thing led to another, Allura asked me about the date and Pidge provoked me about her choice of words.” Lance sighed. “And I guess I said it hadn’t been a date exactly, I don’t know, I was annoyed at Pidge for doing that. So Shiro barged in talking about how that concept made no sense and he started talking about you and mystery guy.” Keith hummed. “It was all very shady, Pidge was being a little shit, I was trying not to out our thing…”

“Pidge _is_ a little shit.” Keith said, voice a bit lower. “But I get them. They keep… Trying to help, I guess.”

“Yeah, they do.” Lance agreed. “They worry because they love us.” Keith nodded. “And that was it, I guess.”

“What else did he say?” Keith asked.

“What exactly do you want to know?” Lance hugged Keith closer, so Keith knew it wasn’t a trick question. Keith hummed.

“I don’t know…” Keith admitted. “You told Allura it was a date?” Keith asked and Lance frowned.

“I told you this already. I didn’t tell her I was out with you, but I had to tell her something so she would help me pick an outfit.” Lance said and sighed. “Why?” Keith shook his head and hummed. Lance didn’t pressure him, again. They stayed silent for a while. Lance started singing a Brazilian song he really liked in a low volume and Keith’s grip on him tightened slightly. Lance chuckled lightly and continued singing.

“What’s that?” Keith asked when he was done.

“It’s a song called ‘ _Trocando em miúdos_ ’, by a guy named Chico Buarque.” Lance answered and Keith hummed.

“Sounds sad.” Keith commented and Lance chuckled.

“That’s because it is.” Lance admitted. “It’s about a relationship that ended badly and the person is telling the other one which things they shared that each one is keeping, they’re leaving their partner because it feels like they don’t belong there. They’re hurt and they’re telling their partner that what they had wasn’t worth the pain.” Keith hummed. “They’re telling their partner they’re not going to give them the pleasure of seeing them cry because of how much the partner hurt them.”

“It’s very sad.” Keith commented.

“I really like it, though. It helped me through hard times.” Lance admitted. “So I keep it in a special place in my heart, I guess.”

“Are you okay?” Keith asked and Lance chuckled.

“Right now? I’m great.” Lance said. “I’ve been fine. It doesn’t affect me much anymore. It’s… Complicated, you know? Ending a relationship that started all wrong for starters, but… Sometimes we go through bad things, but there’s something way better waiting for us just around the corner.” Keith hummed. “I’m surrounded by people who love and support me, so that’s good. It keeps me strong and grounded. Am I making any sense?”

“I’ve never dated anyone, so I don’t know what it feels like to end a relationship, but…” Keith took a deep breath. “I know what’s like to have a song that helps you through hardship, so I can relate to that part.” Lance hummed. “Are you really okay, though? If you want to talk about it… I can listen.”

“I…” Lance started, but hesitated. “I noticed you don’t like talking about things related to The Paladins and… I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” Keith tensed in Lance’s arms and Lance kissed the top of his head. “I do want to tell you, though. If you’d like me to.”

“I don’t know.” Keith admitted and Lance hummed. “It’s your choice.” Lance nodded.

“It’s not a very happy story, so…” Lance started and Keith hummed, moving around a bit. Lance waited for Keith to get himself comfortable again before continuing. “We started the band when we were very young and our first album came out when I was seventeen, right? Hunk and I were seventeen, Matt was twenty one, Pidge was sixteen and Allura and Lotor were nineteen. We were all pretty young when we blew up, especially Pidge, but Allura was very mature and her father used to support us a lot. So a bunch of shit went down that I told you already, my family was gone and I was living with my grandparents, but grandpa was ill, then grandma died, etc, all that jazz you already know about.” Lance started playing with Keith’s hair. “I was vulnerable and young and stupid, so when I was nineteen I was in the peak year of my depression. Have I mentioned that before?”

“I don’t think you have.” Keith answered and Lance hummed.

“Well, so, that happened. And, well, I was vulnerable and sad, but I always tried to keep up the strong and fun Lance act, you know? All eyes on me, I started going around and having as much fun as I’d like to.” Lance’s voice was getting lower. “And, I mean, I had gotten a no from Allura when I told her I had a crush on her and I was miserable. So I started hanging out with Lotor more, you know? ‘Cause Lotor was fun. He was a bit posh and arrogant, but he was fun. He went to parties and he fooled around and never got caught, so I thought: what the hell, let’s do this.” Lance sighed. “I was nineteen, he was twenty one. So we started fooling around together, which is when people started commenting about my partying habits and how I was constantly being spotted with a different person. I was careless and Lotor took advantage of that.

Everything was fine, kind of, for about a year. On my twentieth birthday Lotor threw me a huge surprise party that had a lot of booze and shit. He paid every single gossip magazine existent so no one commented anything about it ‘cause it was ugly. I knew basically no one at the party and my friends had left early because it was weird and shady, so I stuck with Lotor the whole time.” Lance kissed the top of Keith’s head and took a few breaths before continuing. “So things happen, right? And we ended up getting together, Lotor and I. He was my actually my first and he…” Lance hesitated for a second. “He asked me not to tell anyone what had happened. He told me he wasn’t ready for a relationship yet, but that he wanted to make it right and tell everyone about us when he was.” Lance sighed. “The thing is that we didn’t stop there.

He kept taking me everywhere with him and we would hook up and then hook up with other people and he would take people to his apartment and fuck them or whatever and I wouldn’t because I… Didn’t want that. But I was always near when he did. Because he kept me close for, I don’t know. If he got bored or something? And I stayed because… I had never had anyone and…” Lance stopped himself, noticing he had started shaking.

“Change places with me.” Keith said and started moving. Lance let Keith do so and hug Lance. “It’s okay. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” Keith kissed Lance’s head and hugged him tightly. Lance shook his head.

“It’s okay. I want to. I want you to know.” Lance said and Keith kissed the top of his head again, humming. “He used to say that he liked me and that I could stop that whenever, but whenever I tried confronting him, like, hey, if you like me then let’s tell people, you know? He would start telling me I wasn’t respecting his time and I felt awful about it.” Lance chuckled, sadly. “I didn’t want to pressure him into anything. He didn’t have that same problem, though.” Lance sighed. “I mean, he never pressured me into doing _stuff_ , you know? When I said no he respected it and just… Went out to find someone else to fuck, so that’s a good thing. But he would always drag me along anyway.

It sucked big time, but I felt like telling someone about it would be bad because Lotor would want to leave me, you know? And I didn’t want him to leave. He said he loved me and I had never had that. Besides, that whole thing had been going on for almost a whole year and I didn’t know how to tell people or what to tell them. Like, could I go up to Allura and say ‘hey, Lotor and I fuck kind of regularly, but we’re not dating or anything because he isn’t ready for it, but he says he loves me and he lets me fuck other people too, so that’s fine’?” Keith hugged Lance tighter. “Anyway, turns out Matt found out what was happening because he came over one day and Lotor was here.

He caught us together, panicked and ran away before we could tell him not to tell anyone. Poor Matt must have been traumatised from seeing Lotor’s dick.” Lance chuckled. “But the first thing he did was talk to Pidge, who told Hunk, who immediately figured something was wrong because he knew I had been going to parties and shit with Lotor a lot. So he told Allura and Allura went ape shit. But Lotor sweet talked everyone into believing it had only happened that one time and actually asked me to date him in front of everyone and it was… Very sweet, actually.” Lance closed his eyes and tried focusing on the feeling of having Keith’s arms around him. “Turns out he didn’t like me after all…

He took me to this party with him, like, a week later. A _very_ shady party with _very_ shady people. And I was uncomfortable there, so I told Lotor I wanted to go and Lotor told me he needed to stay just for a while more and then we could go back to his apartment and spend the night together. I agreed ‘cause, you know, I liked him and we were dating and I didn’t want to leave him by himself at that shady place.” Lance paused his story for a while, taking a few dee breaths. “Turns out _he_ didn’t have the same problem because half an hour later I found out he had left with some stranger. I called Hunk crying my eyes out, asking him to pick me up, and he did. They all did. So on our way to Hunk’s I told them everything from the start and, oh, boy, I don’t think I’ve ever seen Allura so angry in my entire life. They left me at Hunk’s and the whole squad went straight to Lotor’s apartment. I don’t know what happened there because no one ever told me properly, but…

Apparently Allura beat the shit out of Lotor? Like, straight up yeeted him across a room or something. Because on the next day I saw him, he went after me to apologise, promise me he meant well, he had just gotten too drunk and ask us all to forgive him, and he had a black eye. Which was very satisfying, to be completely honest.” Lance sighed. “Everyone agreed they didn’t want to be involved with someone like that, so they kicked Lotor out. He begged them not to do it, he begged me to take him back, but Allura got between us and told him to fuck off. So he asked us at least not to tell anyone what had happened because it could ruin his reputation.” Lance laughed bitterly. “As if we cared about his fucking reputation…”

“I’m so sorry all this happened to you, Lance.” Keith said and hugged Lance even tighter.

“It’s fine…” Lance put his hands on top of Keith’s. “Turns out after we all talked everything through we collectively decided the best thing was not telling the press what had happened. Because talking about it would actually end up making them focus on me and I didn’t want that. I didn’t want the press to scrutinise my life even more. So we finished our last tour with Lotor, we still had two concerts to go, which was excruciating and then we went on a short hiatus. After a month we released the news that he was no longer a part of the band and the rest is history.”

“I’m so sorry.” Keith said again. Lance slowly got away from Keith’s embrace to look at him in the eye. “I didn’t know.”

“Yeah, I know you didn’t.” Lance smiled faintly and caressed Keith’s cheek. “You do now.”

“I’m so sorry. I…” Keith repeated it. “I’m sorry, Lance.”

“It’s okay, cariño, we didn’t even know each other, there’s nothing you could’ve done.” Lance tried reassuring him. “And I’m fine now. Sometimes it’s kinda hard, but I’m fine.” Keith was looking down and Lance held his chin, lifting his head up so their eyes would meet. “Hey. I trust you. That’s why I’m telling you this.” Keith nodded. “And you’re helping me, Keith. You’re helping me a lot. Okay?”

“Okay…” Keith said and looked down again. “I’m sorry.”

“Hey, look at me.” Lance said and Keith obeyed. Lance smiled at him, fondly. “I’m fine, okay?”

“I don’t want to hurt you.” Keith said and Lance frowned for a second. “Lance, I rally don’t.”

“You won’t.” Lance said, still frowning. “You’d never hurt me like that, Keith.” Keith nodded. “I trust you.”

“But you trusted Lotor too.” Keith said and his own eye widened. “I’m sorry, that was insensitive of me.” Lance chuckled. “What I mean is that… I just… I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologise for.” Lance said. “I’m sorry if I upset you, though.” Keith shook his head. “I wanted you to know because… We need to talk, you know? About this whole not telling anyone deal.” Keith’s breath hitched and Lance caressed his cheeks again. “I know you have your reasons, but Pidge told me if we don’t tell people, they’re going to. And… They’re just trying to protect me.”

“I know.” Keith said and closed his eyes. “I know, but I can’t, Lance. Not right now.” Lance nodded. “I’m sorry. I think I should go.”

“No.” Lance let go of Keith’s face and held his hands. Keith opened his eyes. “Please don’t go… I’m sorry. I’m not going to pressure you into telling Shiro. We can think of something to tell Pidge, just… Please don’t go.” Lance bit his lower lip. “I don’t want to ruin what we’ve got. We don’t have to tell anyone.”

“We can’t… I can’t keep doing this, Lance.” Keith said. “I’m hurting you just like he did and what for? What even is…” Keith stopped and freed his hands, so he could put them on Lance’s face. “I’m hurting Shiro too.” Keith’s thumb brushed a bit harder on Lance’s cheek and Lance shivered. “We’ve been doing this wrong from day one. Whatever this is.” Lance tried not to feel hurt by those words. Maybe he had understood everything wrong from the start and Keith wasn’t interested. Maybe Keith was just scared. Maybe. Maybe. A bunch of maybes were echoing inside his head and Lance wasn’t sure of anything anymore.

“Please don’t be mad at me.” He said.

“Why would I be mad at you?” Keith frowned and Lance took his hands to Keith’s face and brought it closed to his.

“For doing this.” Lance closed the space between their lips.

It took Keith a while to move, but he finally decided to open his mouth and threw his hands behind Lance’s neck. They kissed passionately at first. Lance was desperate, he had been desperate to do that since the first time he saw Keith, but as they grew closer it became harder to deny how much he wanted to kiss Keith. So Lance tried to make up for the lost time at first, but then he started calming down and savouring every inch of Keith’s tongue, lips and mouth.

He didn’t know if it was going to be a one-time thing, he didn’t know if Keith was going to stop and punch him at any second. He didn’t know, so he would appreciate it while it lasted. Keith tugged on Lance’s hair not so lightly and Lance let out a small moan. Keith started kissing Lance’s neck, open mouthed, and soon enough Lance was melting from Keith’s touches. Keith wasn’t being delicate and sweet at first; actually, he seemed angry and as desperate as Lance was. But then he started slowing down and trailing his way back to Lance’s mouth.

Keith nibbled on Lance’s lower lip and Lance moaned again. Lance’s hands were on Keith’s waist and his grip there intensified. Lance let Keith take control of the kiss, scared that he would do something that would make Keith stop. Keith broke the kiss, finally, and touched their foreheads. Both of them had their eyes closed. They were breathing unsteadily and Lance didn’t want to let go of Keith ever again. Once they’d caught their breaths, Lance opened his eyes slowly and gave Keith a small peck on the lips. Keith hummed.

“You okay?” Lance asked. Keith nodded. “Was that okay?” Keith nodded again.

“I’m kinda sleepy, though.” Keith said, eyes still closed. “Can we sleep and talk about it tomorrow?” Lance gave him another peck on the lips.

“Absolutely.” Keith opened his eyes. Lance smiled faintly at him and he just nodded again, lying down and turning his back to Lance. “Night, Keith.”

“Night, Lance.” Lance lied down too and turned his back to Keith. “Sorry if I grab you in the middle of the night. I’m used to sleep hugging Hippo.”

“It’s okay. Be my guest.” Lance said and chuckled. Keith didn’t respond, so Lance let go.

It took Lance about an hour to fall asleep. He wasn’t a religious guy at all, but he prayed with all he had for not having ruined things with Keith.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yooo so çlfdajiodfjçdfslk writing lance's pov is harder for me for some reason??? but lsdfkajkfdjs  
> i was talking to @nonbinary_queen on tumblr dot com and i was thinking about re writing this from lance's perspective or maybe some specific parts of the story but idk if anyone else would be interested? so hmu if u r ldjfsaçfjkdds
> 
> AS ALWAYS: if you wanna talk to me outside of ao3, this is my [my les mis blog](https://whensunscollide.tumblr.com) and this is my [my "main" blog](https://marsisnotcreative.tumblr.com) ; this is my [main twitter account](https://twitter.com/playlandi) and this is my [mostly fandom twitter acc](https://twitter.com/thenotesaresour). i have a [youtube channel](https://youtube.com/marsisnotcreative) too. and i have two instagrams, one is my [main/professional account](https://instagram.com/playlandi) and one is my [cosplay/fandom account](https://instagram.com/enjolmars) . i'm 100% open to chat about anything and 8290184980928% open for people sending me prompts and all sfdalkfdsd
> 
> in case you're able to and you'd like to, feel free to buy me a metaphorical coffee on [ko-fi.com/playlandi](https://ko-fi.com/playlandi) and feel free to send me prompts and all there too, if you'd like (of course, if you send them via any other place, they'll be just as welcome!)
> 
> here's the [full playlist, on spotify,](https://open.spotify.com/user/playlandi/playlist/2vr6vymACCES9lHyLx2Qf4?si=XlmFxYmISimyOxHSnCKHxA) in case anyone wants that dlsfajçfdkjsd><
> 
> also go check out my latest oneshot. it ended up being a smut with friends to lovers klance and keith's jacket is involved thanks baem for the idea (kinda) i love u very much lsdfajçlfdkjs <3
> 
> that's it yall are the best <3 bai


	12. Only you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith panics after the kiss and runs. Last chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is it. the last official chapter of the fic. next chapter will be an epilogue. i'm stressed out about what ya are going to think but dlsjçalkjsd aaanyway
> 
> the name of this chapter was based off of a song called "só você" by mc g15 and dennis dj. it's a brazilian funk dlsçjiaofdçjsdçsd because that's the type of person i am.
> 
> thanks for all the kudos and comments <3
> 
> consider buying me a metaphorical coffee: ko-fi.com/playlandi

Keith couldn’t sleep. He was stupid. He was the dumbest person he’d ever met. He shouldn’t have done that; he should’ve never started any of that. Now he was in too deep and he was doing things exactly the same way Lance’s ex had done and he was a dumb, dumb person. He kept as still as possible, regretting ever having been born, for as long as he could. God only knew how long he stayed like that, trying not to wake Lance up, trying not to make a sound.

He needed to think, but he couldn’t. He wanted to keep kissing Lance, he wanted to wake Lance up and tell Lance how he felt, but he couldn’t. He had to think properly. He had to try understanding what the hell was happening first. Maybe Lance did feel something for him? Lance had kissed him, right? He was the one to start the kiss. He had been the one to do that. But if that was true, then why did he stop talking to Keith after the day at the club?

So maybe Lance didn’t like Keith. But had decided to humour himself by giving Keith a chance because, hey, they were kind of friends, right? And Keith wouldn’t hurt Lance. Maybe Lance knew that. Maybe lance knew how Keith felt. And since Keith was oh so desperate not to let Shiro know, Lance wouldn’t get in trouble. No. That wasn’t Lance at all. Keith crossed that possibility out of his mental list.

And Lance wanted Keith to tell Shiro, right? He had said that. So Keith was back to thinking maybe he had gotten everything wrong from the beginning and maybe they really had been going out on dates from day one. But if that was the case, why would Lance let Keith act just like Lotor had? And why didn’t Pidge say anything? And, once again, why did things get weird after the night at the club? If Lance liked Keith that shouldn’t have been a problem right? But, apparently, it had been. The blowjob had been a problem because things had gotten weird after that. And Lance had asked Keith to forget about it, to forget about that night.

Keith felt like crying, he felt like exploding. After a long time, when he could hear birds singing outside, he decided to, carefully, get up. He was as careful as possible, grabbing his phone, going to the bathroom that wasn’t in Lance’s room and locking himself in there.

He sat on the floor, back to the door and hugged his knees, texting Pidge for help and checking the time. It was six in the morning. There was no way Pidge was awake and he couldn’t text Shiro because if he did that Shiro would demand to know where he was and… That would be a mess. Besides, Shiro had invited Matt over, so the odds of him actually being awake at that time were small, since they had probably spent the night doing… Things Keith didn’t want to picture his big brother doing.

So he waited, staring at the chat with Pidge, hoping that the message would be read soon. He decided to play every game he had on his phone while he waited and to count to a hundred and then back, so maybe he could fall asleep, but he didn’t. He started remembering the previous night and his chest hurt. He had kissed Lance. Lance had kissed him. It was all the same.

But what did that mean, anyway? Did it mean Lance liked him? Maybe Lance just wanted to get into Keith’s pants. But then, again, that wasn’t Lance. Not the Lance Keith had met, not the Lance Keith had learnt to be the real Lance. That was the media’s portrayal of Lance. That was Lance McClain, The Paladins’ vocalist, known womaniser, as described by _Glossip Magazine_. It wasn’t _Lance_.

Keith felt tears start coming from his eyes and groaned in frustration. No. He was _not_ going to cry because of that. It wasn’t him. He didn’t cry for _men_. He wouldn’t cry because of whatever the hell was happening to him, it was ridiculous, he wasn’t a teenager anymore. He was a grown adult. But he couldn’t stop the tears from streaming down his face, which only made him feel angrier. There was a knock on the door.

“Keith?” Lance’s voice was muffled and Keith wasn’t sure if his voice was going to come out steady. Stupid tears, stupid feelings. “Is everything alright?” Lance tried again.

“Yeah.” Keith answered quickly, trying to sound as natural as possible, scared that his voice was going to shake or break if he said more than that.

“I’m making us breakfast, okay?” Lance said and waited. Keith didn’t answer, so Lance just left after a while. Keith gathered all he had in himself to stop his a hundred percent unjustified and unwanted tears, washed his face, attempting to look slightly presentable, and left the bathroom after a few minutes. Keith walked up to Lance’s room, put his day clothes on, grabbed his backpack and went to the kitchen. Lance was staring at his own fridge, a small frown stamped on his face.

“Hey.” Keith caught his attention. Lance looked back, he had a weird expression on his face. “I think I’m heading home, actually.”

“We need to talk, Keith.” Lance said and let go of the fridge’s door. “About last night-“

“I _really_ don’t want to talk about that right now.” Keith said, trying not to be rude, and Lance shook his head.

“I’ve been respecting your boundaries every single time. Since the beginning. But I can’t let you go without discussing that.” Lance swallowed hard. “I’m sorry, Keith, but that’s… Not fair.”

“There’s nothing to discuss, Lance.” Keith said without thinking. He just wanted to disappear. His head was spinning and he wanted to go home. “Nothing happened.” Lance frowned harder. “I really have to go.” Keith turned around, but Lance grabbed his wrist. “Let go.”

“No. That’s… That’s not fair.” Lance said, his voice a bit higher. “You said you didn’t want to hurt me, so don’t you fucking do this to me, man.” Lance’s voice cracked. Keith’s chest hurt. “At least let me make you breakfast.” Lance’s grip tightened slightly on Keith’s wrist. “Please.” Lance’s voice was almost a whisper and Keith turned back to face Lance. His eyes were closed and he looked miserable. Keith didn’t know what to do, so he took one of his hands to Lance’s face. “Keith…” Lance didn’t open his eyes. His voice was low and Keith couldn’t stand looking at him like that, hearing his voice like that.

“Give me a week.” Keith started. “I need one week to figure things out.”

“A day.” Lance said and frowned, eyes still closed. “We’re talking again tomorrow.” Lance’s voice was weak, but he opened his eyes. Lance looked uncertain. Keith nodded. “Okay… I’m going to stall Pidge for one day more, but after that…”

“I know.” Keith said. Lance let go of Keith’s wrist. “We’ll talk tomorrow.” Lance nodded. “Thanks.” Lance walked Keith to the door and Keith took a deep breath before leaving, not looking back at any point. He didn’t hear Lance closing the door behind him at any point.

The entire way home, Keith was holding back his tears. Did he even know why the hell he was crying? Or why everything felt so wrong? Why couldn’t he just talk to Lance properly and solve things? He was feeling out of himself, he needed to go home, he needed Shiro.

As soon as he got home and smelled coffee he felt his eyes water. He let go of his bag and walked into the kitchen. Shiro turned to the door and pulled Keith into a hug immediately. Keith broke down, not minding the fact that Matt was watching them both.

“Shiro.” Keith felt like a baby and he felt pathetic, but he was confused and he didn’t know what was happening. He could hear his own blood rushing through his body and he felt like his heard was going to explode. He was having a full on panic attack.

“It’s okay.” Shiro was holding him tight and caressing his hair. “It’s okay, you’re home. I’m here. You’re home. Breathe, Keith. Breathe with me.” Shiro kept repeating words of comfort and telling Keith to breathe as Keith let it all out; just like he used to when they were younger. Eventually Keith stopped sobbing and Shiro stopped talking; they just stayed there, hugging, for a while and breathing together. “Talk to me.” Shiro said when Keith had fully stopped crying. “For all that is sacred, talk to me, Keith.” Keith nodded and took a few deep breaths.

“Promise me you’re not going to be mad at anyone.” Keith said and Shiro sighed. “Please promise.”

“I can’t promise that.” Shiro hugged Keith tighter. “But I can promise you I’m not fighting anyone.”

“I fucked up so much.” Keith said and Shiro slowly let go of him. “Hey, Matt.”

“Hey.” Matt said. Shiro and Keith sat down. “Want me to leave?”

“No, it’s… Okay…” Keith sighed and dried his face. “Just… Please don’t hate me?”

“I’d never hate you, Keefer, my dude.” Matt said and smiled at Keith, who just nodded, tears coming out of his eyes automatically.

“You were right; I shouldn’t have gone to his apartment yesterday.” Keith said and Shiro frowned. “Before you think he did something: he didn’t. He didn’t hurt me. I hurt him, Shiro. I keep hurting him. Allura’s right, I’m being selfish.” Shiro opened his mouth, but Keith stopped him. “Lance told me about what you talked the other day.”

“Why did-“ Shiro started saying, but Keith interrupted him again.

“Because Lance is mystery guy.” Keith looked down and took a few deep breaths to stop himself from freaking out again. Shiro and Matt waited without saying a word. “It’s been him this entire time.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Shiro asked and Keith didn’t dare looking at him.

“I didn’t think things would get past a first… Hang out.” Keith said and shook his head. “He didn’t even call it a date back then. And then we started texting regularly and even facetimed a couple of times and went out a second time and he bought me _chocolate_.” Keith sighed. “And it started growing from there, but I asked him not to mention it to anyone, which was my first and biggest mistake and exactly when I started hurting him.” Keith looked at Matt, terrified of what he would see, but Matt didn’t look angry or disappointed. He had pity in his eyes. Keith recognised pity very well. “I didn’t know. I didn’t know about Lotor, I had no idea. I just didn’t want Lance to know I was a fan and… Judge me or something. I didn’t mean to hurt him, I swear.”

“I know.” Matt said and smiled faintly at Keith. “There was no way you could know about Lotor, Keith. We hid it from everyone. Lance didn’t want anyone to know.”

“And then we went out more times and he got me back to playing the piano and I helped him with that one song and…” Keith had started to hyperventilate. “He almost kissed me, I think, I don’t know! And _Pidge_ found out somehow and we had to convince them to lie too. And then we went clubbing and I…” Keith stopped himself for an instant, not sure he wanted to share _that_ much about said night. “I fucked up again and pushed Lance away and I…”

“Wait, how did you fuck up?” Shiro asked. “Keith, I need you to tell me everything, okay? No more lying, no more hiding things.” Keith nodded and swallowed loudly.

“I sucked Lance off.” Keith admitted and looked to his own hands. “We were dancing and I was tipsy, so was he, and we went to his private box and I… Sucked him off. And then we talked and everything was okay, but I went away and I was terrified that would change us and it did. So we spent a long ass time without talking, until the day of the Unplugged session.” Keith took another deep breath. “And he sang those songs and he was _looking at me_ , Shiro, he was looking at me when he sang them and I thought it was me imagining things, so I just brushed it off and then he sang our song and…” Keith’s eyes started widening. “And then he asked me to forget about that night at the club and we went back to normal and started hanging out again and facetiming even more and he gave me flowers.”

“Eleven white roses and one red rose in the middle.” Shiro said and Matt gasped. “Yeah.”

“What does that even _mean_?” Keith asked, but didn’t give them time to answer. “And then yesterday everything was fine. He cooked for me and we watched Gilmore Girls and we went to his room and it was fine. Until he told me about Lotor and I realised I was doing to him exactly what Lotor did, so I freaked out and Lance…” Keith frowned. “Lance kissed me. He asked for permission first. In a weird way, but he did. He kissed me.” Keith looked up at Shiro. “And I kissed him back. But then I just… I just ran.” Shiro sighed and ran his left hand through his hair.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Shiro asked and Keith blinked a few times.

“It all started because I was scared you’d be mad at him. I didn’t know whether it was all a joke or if I was reading too much into everything. I didn’t want to cause any trouble. I was scared you’d give him the intentions talk when he didn’t even know me.” Keith said. “But then… I was terrified. I was terrified you’d talk to him and he would say he didn’t want anything serious with me. I was terrified I was getting it all wrong, so I started convincing myself he didn’t want anything with me, that we were just friends. But Lance would flirt with me and open up about personal things and I didn’t know what to think anymore. And at some point it was too late and I was just terrified you’d be mad at me for not telling you and mad at Lance for… Whatever the hell.”

“I’m… Not mad.” Shiro sighed. “I’m disappointed. But I’m not mad.” Keith nodded.

“Sorry to intrude, but… Why did you run today?” Matt frowned. “I mean… If Lance kissed you yesterday doesn’t that mean something? Especially if he kissed you _after_ he told you everything about Lotor.”

“I… don’t know…” Keith said. “What if I’m getting it all wrong?”

“Keith.” Shiro sighed. “Remember when I told you that you should dump mysterious guy because there were other people who were interested?” Keith nodded. “I meant Lance.” Matt gasped.

“Shiro!” Matt said, high pitched. “You can’t tell Keith everything I tell you, for fucks sake!”

“What?” Keith frowned, looking at Matt.

“I overheard Pidge talking to Lance on the phone and Lance saying something about having a crush on you or something. I don’t know. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, so I just walked away from the room before Pidge could see me, which means I didn’t get the whole conversation, but…” Matt sighed. “So when Shiro told me he was worried about you because you were going out with this guy who you thought didn’t give a fuck about you I told him maybe we could try matchmaking you and Lance.” Matt shrugged. “Turns out I just got everything wrong.”

“Lance has a crush on me?” Keith blinked a few times.

“Wow, you really are dumb.” Matt shook his head, in absolute awe. “He _obviously_ does, Keefer. He bought you _chocolate_ and _flowers_ and kept whatever the hell was going on between the two of you a secret for ages even though Lance knows better than to lie to Allura after everything that went down with Lotor.”

“Lance has a crush on me.” Keith repeated. “Wait, but why did he… Ask me to forget about the night at the club?”

“Keith… Are you sure you weren’t the one to push him away and hint at him that you regretted what had happened?” Shiro sighed, exasperated. Keith’s phone started vibrating and he took it out of his pocket.

“Hi.” He said and excused himself from the kitchen. “It’s Pidge.” Matt and Shiro nodded. “Sorry to scare you.”

“ _Lance called me._ ” Pidge’s voice sent a shiver down Keith’s spine. “ _I’m calling Shiro right after I end this call, so you have about ten seconds to get a fake ID and run from the country before I spill the truth.”_

“I already did. I told Shiro everything.” Keith said and Pidge went silent. Keith checked the screen and they hadn’t ended the call. “Pidge?”

“ _You did?_ ” Pidge sighed. “ _What the_ fuck _happened, Keith?”_

“I panicked. I think I got everything wrong, I don’t _know_.” Keith admitted. “I don’t know.”

“ _Call him in an hour and fucking_ talk to him _, Kogane._ ” Pidge’s voice sounded exhausted. “ _He’s on the phone with Hunk right now and that’s going to take a while because he’s_ crying _…_ ” Pidge sighed. “ _I hate both of you, let me get this straight. If only you had listened to me from the start…_ ”

“I know.” Keith admitted. “I really like him, Pidge.”

“ _I know, dude._ ” Pidge sighed. “ _That’s literally the only reason why I didn’t kill you yet. Because you actually like him…_ ”

“You think he’s going to understand?” Keith asked, unsure.

“ _Keith… I don’t think_ you _understand. So maybe you two can help each other understanding together._ ” Pidge said. “ _You’re so dumb. I’m so angry at you right now._ ”  Pidge sighed and Keith felt awful. “ _Listen, I’m going back to bed because I’m_ exhausted _and I honestly cannot deal with this shit right now. Call him in an hour and_ talk to him _, Keefer._ ”

“Will do.” Keith said and Pidge hummed. “Thanks, Pidge. I’m sorry.”

“ _You’re so damn lucky I love your dumb ass, tall person._ ” Pidge said before ending the call. Keith got back to the kitchen.

Matt and Shiro were drinking coffee silently as Keith entered the room again. He sat down besides Shiro and threw his head carelessly back, hitting the wall and closing his eyes.

“What have we agreed on self-destructive behaviour in common areas of the flat?” Shiro said, joking. Keith chuckled.

“We keep self-destructive behaviour to our private rooms.” Keith answered and Shiro hummed. “Lance is telling Hunk right now and, apparently, he’s crying.” Keith sighed. “I guess that makes two of us.”

“I know you’ve never done this before, but, _honestly_ , Keith…” Shiro sighed. “All this could’ve been avoided if you had _talked_ to Lance from the beginning. And not lied to me.”

“I know…” Keith opened his eyes and sighed. “I fucked up. Big time. And I did it exactly like Lotor did it, so I probably caught Lance off guard.” Matt nodded. “I’m going to my room now and I’m going to call him later.” Keith stood up, got his bag from the living room floor, changed into his own pyjamas again and lied down on his bed.

He unlocked his phone and opened Lance’s chat, thinking about what to write.

 **Keith: Hey. I’m sorry to run off like that.**  
**Keith: I know there’s no excuse to that. Or to what I said. Or to any of what I’ve been doing.**  
 **Keith: I told Shiro everything. Matt was here, so I told him too. I can talk to Allura if you want me to. I’ll take the blame. I hurt you and I had no right to. I’ve been hurting you all this time because I was terrified I was going to end up hurting myself.**  
 **Keith: I’m not trying to excuse any of my behaviour, I just want to honestly apologise.**  
 **Keith: So call me when you’re free? We can facetime or something if you’re comfortable with that.**  
 **Keith: And if you’d rather do it face to face you’re free to come over.**  
 **Keith: Or I can go over if you’d prefer.**  
 **Keith: We’ve been doing this on my terms all this time. I wanna do this right. I wanna do this on your terms now.**  
 **Keith: I’m sorry, Lance. I’m honestly sorry for hurting you. I never meant to. I never thought I could do it.**  
 **Keith: You deserve so much better than that.**

Keith locked the screen of his phone and closed his eye for a second, letting his conscious drift away as he started feeling a little better.

He woke up four hours later with a text from Lance. And texted Shiro.

 **Keith: Lance is coming over tonight. He’ll be here at six pm.**  
**Shiro: I’m not home. I’m at Matt’s. And I’m sleeping over.**  
 **Keith: Okay.**  
 **Shiro: Please don’t panic. Stay calm. Patience yields focus.**  
 **Keith: Thanks.**  
 **Keith: I love you, Shiro.**  
 **Shiro: I love you too, Keith.**

He got out of bed and started organising the flat. He had three hours to do that, take a shower and put on some decent clothes and not look like he had been hit by a train so he could have Lance over. He had three hours to psych himself up for their conversation and for whatever happened from it.

Keith was waiting sitting down on the couch when Lance got to the building. He had let the doorman know Lance was going over, so when he got there he didn’t need to let Keith know. He’d done it because he didn’t know if he would change his mind midway and tell the doorman to tell Lance he wasn’t home. Keith was dumb, weak and afraid.

When the bell rang Keith started feeling his heart beat pound into his chest, but he gathered all the courage he had to open it up. Lance had texted him letting him know he had gotten there before ringing the bell.

“Hi.” Keith greeted Lance and Lance nodded, looking down. “Come on in.” Lance nodded again. His hands were on the pockets of his jeans. “Do you want to drink something?”

“I’m good.” He answered, still looking down. Keith hummed.

“Let’s sit.” Keith led Lance to the sofa and they both sat down on the same one, but apart from each other. It was weird to sit like that when they were alone, but Keith didn’t get any closer. He didn’t want to overstep boundaries or do anything that made things worse. “Thanks for coming.” Lance hummed, still not looking at Keith. “Lance, I’m sorry.”

“I know.” Lance said and chuckled lightly. “It’s okay, Keith, I understand.”

“You... Do?” Keith frowned.

“I had all afternoon to think and the signs had been there all along I was just…” Lance licked his lips and bit his lower one, taking a deep breath. “I fooled myself, I guess. It’s fine, happens.”

“Lance.” Keith called his name, but Lance was still looking down. “Please look at me.” Lance hesitated, but ended up looking at Keith. Lance’s eyes were puffy, he had clearly been crying. Keith felt like shit. “When we first met I tried seeming uninterested because…” Keith sighed. “I’ve been a fan of The Paladins ever since I first watched that concert years ago. But I didn’t want any of you to find out. And then you asked for my number and I just… Couldn’t let you know.” Lance hummed. “I didn’t want you to see me as a fan.”

“I never saw you as a fan.” Lance said. “But I knew you were one. I’ve known it for a while now.”

“You have?” Keith frowned. “How?”

“I’m not dumb, you know? You’d always avoid talking about the band. And when I came over I saw your CDs. You have physical copies of our albums and EPs. No one has that now unless they’re a fan.” Lance shrugged. “I thought it was cute.” He admitted. “And it’s a relief because for a while I thought you hated the band and I was terrified because it’s my _job_ , but also because the songs have so much of me in them, so…” Lance smiled faintly. “But you kept acting as if you didn’t know the songs, you never commented on band stuff, so I thought I shouldn’t mention it.”

“Oh…” Keith frowned. “You… Don’t mind that?”

“I don’t mind that at all.” Lance chuckled. “But I get it, you had this celebrity crush on me thing and you realised I’m not the same Lance the media talks about, so you changed your mind and that’s fine, I get it.” Lance swallowed loudly while smiling faintly. “I wouldn’t be into me either, if we’re being honest here.” He scratched his thighs lightly. “It’s okay.” Lance looked down.

“You knew about that too?” Keith frowned harder.

“I didn’t. Hunk told me today. But I wouldn’t have minded that if I’d known it from the beginning either.” Lance chuckled and Keith pocked his forehead, making him look up at him again.

“Stop looking away.” Keith said and Lance nodded. “I didn’t want you to see me as fan. And when we went out for the first time you referred to it as ‘hanging out’, which made me confused. So I dressed up and nothing happened between us, so I thought maybe you just wanted a friend.”

“Keith, I mentioned I was texting you because Pidge had told me you’re gay.” Lance pointed out.

“But you didn’t _do_ anything.” Keith said and shook his head, confused. “And you didn’t _say_ anything else. Plus you called it ‘hanging out’, how was I supposed to know?”

“I tried kissing you when we got here.” Lance frowned. “You didn’t want to. Because Shiro could see it.” Lance pointed out. “But then we started talking and you never really answered my flirting, so I thought _you_ just wanted to be friends. Which was fine. Because you were fun and easy to talk to and I felt comfortable around you, which was something I hadn’t felt with anyone new in a long time. And you didn’t talk to me about The Paladins, which was great because I didn’t have to worry you were with me because of whatever. You were with me because you _wanted to_.” Lance admitted. “Which doesn’t mean I wouldn’t have gone out with you if I knew you were a fan.”

“Sounds a lot like it, though.” Keith said and hugged his knees near his chest.

“No. What I meant is that…” Lance sighed. “It just felt like you were hanging out with me because of… me.” Lance started scratching his thighs a little harder. “And that was… new for me. I guess… And not bringing the band up meant not having to think about Lotor, which was something I was doing a lot before. But not when I was with you. Even if he _was_ brought up, he wasn’t constantly on the back of my head when we were together and that was… That _is_ what makes me feel so… Drawn to you, I guess.”

“I hated talking about the band because I didn’t want you to think I was with you for that. And then you got back from touring and you bought me chocolate and I was… Very confused, but determined not to let it go to my head.” Keith bit his lower lip. “Because you were my childhood crush and that was my childhood dream and it was hard at first. To come to my senses. And I tried my best to convince myself you didn’t want to be with me or anything. Because I was terrified of getting too high and falling too hard.”

Keith stopped talking for a while and grabbed Lance’s hand, so Lance stopped carving his nails into his thighs. Lance looked away for a second, but then back at Keith, nodding. Keith let his hands go. Lance took his shoes off and mimicked Keith’s position on the sofa.

“Then I went to your place and… It was so nice.” Keith smiled faintly. “You made me feel so comfortable the entire time and I told you about my family and my life and you didn’t pity me. You listened, you shared, you helped. You got me back to playing the piano and you were so respectful all the time.” Keith sighed. “And Pidge found out about it somehow…”

“I texted them after the tickling because I panicked.” Lance admitted. “I told them I had someone over and, apparently, they knew you were over at someone’s and I told them about that whole tickling incident and how I _really_ wanted to have kissed you then.”

“Oh.” Keith chuckled, feeling a bit embarrassed. “Yeah, I think Shiro told Matt, who told Pidge, that I had a date. And they texted me and I told them I didn’t know whether it was a date. He asked me if I was at yours and then asked me about how I liked my popcorn.”

“I told them I couldn’t kiss you because I didn’t know it was date and that I was making us popcorn.” Lance chuckled. “They just got lucky. They’re not _that_ smart.” Keith chuckled. “But you freaked out, so I thought you weren’t interested. And then you told me about your life and I was determined to get whatever you had to offer me, you know?” Lance sighed. “Plus, the whole keeping it a secret thing hit kind of close to home and I was trying hard not to mind that much, but…”

“Yeah…” Keith sighed. “And then the club happened.”

“Yeah…” Lance said and curled himself to hide his face. “That happened.”

“You started texting me less and I thought it was a sign. Like…” Keith had to be brave to talk about that, so he gathered all his courage to do so. “I thought maybe it had been… Bad? I had never sucked a dick before.” He could feel himself blushing and Lance was getting redder too. “And you toned down the texting, so I thought ‘ok, maybe he doesn’t want to see me anymore’. But then you asked for my help with that song and I thought that maybe you had just been working a lot. But it took you four weeks to even mention the possibility of facetiming again…”

“I thought you were mad at me, Keith.” Lance said and frowned. “I thought I had fucked it up with you.”

“By doing what, exactly?” Keith frowned.

“I tried to kiss you and you looked the other way.” Lance said, volume a little higher. “And before that I tried helping you with your boner and you didn’t want me to. So by the end of the night I thought ‘oh, okay, alright, so maybe he felt like he _had_ to do this, but he didn’t really want to, which is why he didn’t want me to touch him’. And I panicked.” Lance was waving his hands around. “I thought I had forced you into doing that.”

“No!” Keith sat on his kneed and grabbed Lance’s hands. “I’m sorry, Lance. You didn’t force me into anything. I did it willingly. A hundred percent.”

“You were… scared I had stopped talking to you because you’d given me a bad blowjob?” Lance frowned deeper. “Was that… What you thought of me?”

“No. Lance…” Keith sighed. “I regretted doing it. Not because I regretted _doing it_. I didn’t. I couldn’t stop thinking about it and whenever I looked at the mark you left on me I’d wish I could do it again. I regretted it but because I was terrified I had ruined things. And also because I was scared I was falling for you…”

Keith let go of Lance’s hands and sat back like he was sitting before. Lance crossed his legs and got a bit closer to Keith. Okay. That was a good sign, right?

“And then the Unplugged session happened. You asked me to forget about what had happened.” Keith said and sighed. “You meant you having tried to kiss me, right? I hadn’t thought of that. I just thought you had meant that night in general. And… the blowjob. As in: that was a mistake, we should just be friends.”

“That was kind of what I meant, but then I realised I didn’t want to be just friends with you.” Lance admitted. “I’ve never wanted to be just friends with you. It all started as me lusting over you, but then I got to know you and…” Lance chuckled. “As you were worried you were falling for me I was panicking over the fact that I was already balls deep into my feelings for you and I would probably get hurt real bad.” Lance grabbed Keith’s hands and started playing with his fingers. “And I used the concert to either have you understand my message and say yes or tell me to fuck off. So we covered ‘Do I Wanna Know’ and Pidge almost kicked me in the nuts for that. And I played Red. Just for you.” Lance said and took a deep breath. “But you didn’t seem to get it.”

“I didn’t get it until today.” Keith admitted. “The song was about me, right?” Lance chuckled and nodded.

“Why did you run away, Keith?” Lance asked. “If you feel the same, and that’s what I’m getting from this conversation, correct me if I’m wrong… Why did you run?”

“I wasn’t sure of what it had meant. I’m… Complicated, Lance. I’ve never done this before. Feelings… I have never done feelings before. And I was scared.” Keith admitted. “I am scared. When you told me about Lotor you said something about a relationship that starts bad being doomed to end or whatever and I…” Keith sighed. “I really care about you, Lance. And I was sure I was the one who was going to get hurt when you finally found someone you liked or when you got back to hooking up with fans like before.” Keith frowned. “But yesterday I realised you were the one hurting this entire time because… of me. I had no idea that was a possibility. It seemed surreal: the possibility of _me_ hurting _you_. I didn’t think I was that relevant. Even though Pidge warned me, I just thought… It didn’t make any sense.”

“And yet here we are.” Lance chuckled and took Keith’s hands to his mouth, kissing Keith’s knuckles one by one. “Miscommunication is the worst plot device in the universe, you know?” Keith chuckled. “Keith… Can we pause this conversation for a bit and do something else? Like, watch something together, I don’t know…”

“Are you sure?” Keith asked and Lance nodded. “Okay…” Keith took his hands from Lance’s and turned his TV on. “What do you want to watch.”

“Tangled.” Lance answered immediately. Keith nodded and put Tangled on.

When he got back to the sofa, he positioned himself next to Lance, but didn’t touch him. Lance punched him lightly on the shoulder and laughed, pulling Keith closer to him. Keith rested his body against Lance’s smiling. He could feel Lance’s heart beating fast as they intertwined they fingers.

That time around Lance sang every single one of the songs and Keith didn’t dare falling asleep on him. He played with Lance’s fingers throughout the entire movie and made sure to pay attention to Lance’s reactions and breathing and heartbeat. It all made sense now.

They stayed silent even after the film ended. Lance hugged Keith tighter and Keith tightened his grip on Lance’s hands, both their hearts beating faster. Lance rubbed the tip of his nose on the back of Keith’s head and Keith was glad he had washed his hair that day.

“I love this film.” Lance said and kissed the top of Keith’s head. “I love you.” Keith swallowed loudly. “I don’t need you to say it back to me. I know you’re bad with feelings and I don’t even know if what you feel is the same as what I feel, but… I love you, Keith.”

“You can’t know that after just a few months.” Keith said and closed his eyes, Lance hummed. “It’s too soon.”

“Watch me knowing it anyways.” Lance answered and Keith chuckled. “I love you, Keith. And I’d like to be good to you, to be with you.”

Keith opened his eyes and let go of Lance, turning around so he could sit on Lance’s lap and face him. He gave Lance soft peck on the lips and touched their foreheads together.

“I like you a lot.” Keith said. “I can’t tell you it is love. That’s… A hard thing for me.” Lance hummed and rubbed their noses together. Keith chuckled. “But I know I’ve wanted to be with you for a while too. So maybe we could start from there and see how it goes?”

“Yeah… I’d like that.” Lance same and gave Keith a peck on the lips. “As long as we start communicating properly.”

“I don’t think anyone’s letting us pull something like this ever again.” Keith said and Lance chuckled, agreeing. “I’m going to kiss you now, if that’s okay.”

“As long as you don’t fucking run away again, you can kiss me how many times you’d like to, mullet.” Lance half joked and Keith rolled his eyes before closing the space between their lips.

Their second kiss was much sweeter than their first kiss. Lance took his time exploring all of Keith’s mouth, Keith’s neck, Keith’s collarbones, Keith’s ears. And Keith did the same with Lance.

“Spend the night.” Keith said when they pulled away to breathe. “And let me make you breakfast tomorrow. To make up for today.”

“Don’t you work tomorrow?” Lance asked and Keith shrugged.

“I can call in sick.” Keith said and Lance gasped dramatically. “It’s not a big deal. I’ve never missed a day of work before, so…”

“I need to tell you something, though… Apparently I got drunk and told Allura about us at some point.” Lance admitted and Keith shrugged.

“Doesn’t matter.” He said. “You were in your right to tell your friends. I was a dick.”

“You were scared. I can relate.” Lance answered and gave Keith a peck. “I wrote you another song.”

“You can play it to me next time I go to your flat.” Keith said and kissed Lance lightly. “Instead of making a spectacle of it and playing it for the first time in front of other people too.” Lance playfully pushed Keith away from his lap, but Keith held him and they ended up falling together on the floor. Lance on top of Keith, laughing. “Get off me, you’re heavy.” Lance didn’t stop laughing; he just hugged Keith, who ended up hugging him back.

They stayed like that for a while, laughing together. Keith had been sure he was the luckiest man alive when Shiro joined The Paladins for a few concerts. He had been sure he was the luckiest man on Earth when he was allowed to mess around with The Paladins’ instruments. He had been sure he was the luckiest man in the entire solar system when he had heard Lance talk about how he thought Shiro was a good drummer. He had been sure he was the luckiest man in the entire universe when Lance had flirted with him the first time. He had been sure he was the luckiest man alive when Lance had texted him inviting him to go out with him.

Keith had thought himself to be the luckiest man in all of existence because Lance had given him the time of his day, but, actually, he was the luckiest man in all of existence to be loved by Lance. And as they laughed together and Lance held him tight and Keith realised how lucky he was he felt his heart beat faster and his chest get warmer.

Lance could hate him for what he’d done. For how dumb he’d been. Lance could’ve thought Keith wasn’t worth all that trouble and all that, definitely, unnecessary drama. He could’ve given up on Keith the first time Keith hadn’t show any apparent interest. He could’ve given up on Keith right at the start, but he didn’t.

“What did the roses mean?” Keith asked and Lance chuckled. “I never got around to google it.”

“They mean you’re the only one.” Lance explained. “The only red rose in the middle of a lot of white ones.” Keith felt a smile grow on his face.

“I take it back.” Keith said and Lance looked at him, quickly and confused. Keith smiled at him. “It’s not too early to know.” Lance’s eyes widened for an instant. “I love you, Lance.” Lance giggled before closing the space between their lips one more time.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyway,,,,,,,,,,,, i hope you enjoyed this fic. next chapter is going to be an epilogue, so there's that.
> 
> writing this was freeing in many ways. this is my first klance fic and also the second long fic i finish in my entire life. i'v been writing another klance fic with ghost!lance eyes emoji eyes emoji. and i'm planning an electra heart!lance au too, but this one will take a bit longer to be ready. if you're a part of the les mis fandom, look forward for me posting my new bookstore AU enjoltaire really soon. and also my electra heart!courf fic is going to happen probably next year.
> 
> thank you so, so, so much for reading this angsty crap dsçaljdoidasjd thanks for all the comments and kudos, yall really do rock <3  
> if you wanna talk to me my main tumblr is @marsisnotcreative and my les mis one is @whensunscollide. my twitter is @playlandi and so is my main and professional instagram account. i have a cosplay account too, which is @enjolmars.  
> come talk to me about klance and voltron and les mis and musicals!!! also feel free to send me prompts anywhere, really :D
> 
> i have a youtube channel too, which is /marsisnotcreative, in case you're interested hMM  
> and in case you want to, buy me a metaphorical coffee and help me being able to keep producing stuff (fanfic, videos, etc): ko-fi.com/playlandi
> 
> shout out to myself for using lance mcclain to drag my not creative ass in the fic when he says “Miscommunication is the worst plot device in the universe, you know?” dlfksjajçfdsçlfdjfdslkj anyway,,,,,,,
> 
> i'll see yall again next week <3


	13. When we're old and grey I'd answer the same

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heeey everyone!!!!!! how are yall doing??? i hope you're oki <3 this is it. it's the final chapter officially :oooo this will be an epilogue to the story, so yeeeeaaah  
> thanks for emerson for all the love and support through my creative process. i love you. a lot.
> 
> i hope yall dig this <333
> 
> lets go!!!

Keith woke up from the sudden lack of heat by his side on the bed. He didn’t open his eyes just yet; first he reached out to the side, trying to get a grip of something that was missing, but he didn’t find anything. He opened his eyes slowly, frowning when he saw emptiness beside him. Keith yawned and stretched, while still lying down. He reached out to the bedside table next to his head and checked his phone for the time: nine thirty in the morning. Keith sighed and jumped out of bed, putting his cat slippers on before leaving the bedroom.

On his way to the bathroom he noticed the smell of something slightly burnt and smiled to himself fondly. He washed his face, brushed his teeth – he still had a sour taste in his mouth from the night before and the thought of it made him smile wickedly –, fixed his hair up in a ponytail and walked to the kitchen. Lance was putting the slightly burnt waffles and the seemingly perfect scrambled eggs onto two plates. Keith walked up to him and carefully hugged him from behind, kissing his neck.

“Morning.” Keith said and nibbled on Lance’s earlobe. Lance huffed.

“I almost dropped breakfast.” Lance replied, sounding a little bit annoyed and Keith chuckled. “Morning, bebê.” Lance held both plates up and Keith loosened his grip so Lance could turn around and face him. Keith gave him a peck on the lips and Lance smiled at him. “You’re forgiven.”

“Thank you.” Keith said and let go of Lance walking out of the kitchen to the dining room and sitting down on his usual chair.

“The waffles are kind of…” Lance frowned. “Burnt. But they’re still edible.”

“I have no complaints.” Keith shrugged and Lance nodded. They both knew how bad Keith was in the kitchen. Lance had tried teaching him how to make cookies and brownies, but Keith had almost set their kitchen on fire once and had failed miserably the second time around because the brownies ended up tasting like dirt somehow. Lance walked back to the kitchen and then reappeared with forks and two mugs in his hands, handing Keith’s one of each and putting his on the table next to his own plate. “What are the plans for today?” Lance hummed.

“I’ll have to go down to the studio for a few hours after lunch, but I’ll be back at four. I thought we could watch a movie together or something.” Lance answered and took a sip of his coffee. Keith hummed. “You’re welcome to come with me as always.”

“You know I don’t like going to the studio with you. It ruins all the surprises about the new songs and I like hearing them when they’re all done.” Keith said and smiled. Lance rolled his eyes.

“I can’t believe you’re still a fanboy of The Paladins.” Lance smiled fondly and Keith shrugged, smiling too. “Are you up for the movie, thought?” Keith nodded.

“Sure. If you want to.” He took some of his pancake to his mouth. “They’re good.” Lance’s smile widened. “But maybe something here? I’m not sure I’m in the mood to share you with fans on the street tonight.”

“Aw, you’re jealous?” Lance said and grinned. Keith shrugged.

“You just got back from tour and I’d like to have my boyfriend all to myself for a few days, thank you very much.” He answered and Lance’s smile grew even wider. Keith took more pancake to his mouth. “Just one night won’t kill your fans.”

“My _other_ fans.” Lance corrected him and Keith rolled his eyes. Lance chuckled. “Aw, come on. You can’t deny you’re a fan, cariño. I know all your dirty little secrets. I know about the posters and the blog and –“

“Goddamn it, Lance, can you not bring that shit up?” Keith cut him off, feeling his own cheeks starting to burn up and Lance laughed loudly in response. “I’d like to burry my past and keep it buried for ever. It’s embarrassing.”

“I think it’s endearing.” Lance shrugged and playfully kicked Keith from under the table. “I’m serious. It’s adorable.”

“Shut up.” Keith looked down to his mug and Lance laughed again.

“Hey, look at me.” Lance asked; Keith ignored him and took a sip of his green tea. “Keith.” Lance called him again and he continued ignoring Lance. “Don’t be like that, cariño. I’m not making fun of you.”

“I know you’re not. But it’s embarrassing anyway.” Keith answered and Lance grabbed his hands as soon as he put his mug back on the table. Keith looked up to see Lance smiling fondly at him. “You’re lucky I love you or else I would’ve been kicking your ass right now.” Lance chuckled and kissed Keith’s hands.

“I know.” Keith smiled at him and Lance kissed his hands again before letting them go.

They both continued eating their breakfast relatively quiet; occasionally commenting on something about the tour Lance had just gotten back from. It was good, it was comfortable. Both Keith and Lance were always at their most vulnerable after a particularly long tour of The Paladins, so they liked easing their way back to themselves together and slowly. It had taken them a few years to learn how to work out after tours, how to work out when Lance was away or when Keith was working a lot at the Blade of Marmora now that he was a co-owner with Kolivan. It had taken them a few years to learn their boundaries and how to deal with each other'’ vulnerabilities properly, but they had learnt.

Silence was never filled with unspoken words anymore; they communicated well. They had learnt that after the unnecessarily messy beginning they had as a couple. And they grew better at understanding when to talk to each other. Keith had found out Lance was an oversharer of trivial things, but had a really rough time opening up about the things that bothered him; he was very insecure and at the beginning he was constantly scared of losing Keith. Lance had learnt Keith was quite the opposite, as soon as he started to fully trust Lance he started telling Lance everything about himself; his insecurities and all of his feelings, which overwhelmed Lance at first. So they found a balance. Lance had learnt how to open up more and Keith had learnt when was a good time to open up completely and when he had to take it slow. But Lance had also learnt when it was important for him to just let Keith rant or ramble and Keith had also learnt when he had to let Lance be quiet and when he had to insist that Lance told him things.

They worked out together, they had learnt how to. Slowly. With some conflict. But after five years, they had managed to get to a great and very stable place.

Time flew and when Keith realised he was alone in their apartment. So he took his time unpacking Lance’s stuff; Lance hated to do it and Keith liked organising things to keep his mind occupied and his anxiety levels low, so they were both glad they could help each other out. Whenever Lance had brought a surprise for Keith from touring, he would either get it out of the bag and hide it on the exact moment he arrived home or leave it with Shiro so he could get it later and not risk Keith finding it.

Keith always ended up taking some time in the unpacking process to think about how lucky he was. Not because he was engaged to his teenage years celebrity crush. Not because he lived with Lance McClain, lead vocalist of The Paladins. Because he was in love with the most amazing, kind, sweet, understanding man on the planet. Because he was dating the actual love of his life. Because the love of his life loved him back. Keith was lucky. And so was Lance.

He had never believed in soulmates or anything of the sort, but Lance had made him believe in fate and he was pretty sure they were meant to be together. Nothing and no one could tear them apart – and in five years, some things and people had tried. Crazy fans who hated Keith, tabloids who talked shit about Lance and lied about him cheating. Keith was happier than he had ever been and he knew Lance was too; that made him even happier.

After he was done, Keith showered and sat on their couch, putting an episode of Gilmore Girls on so he could watch it. It had taken Lance five entire years, but he had finally convinced Keith to watch the show. The things people do for love. Lance got home after three episodes. Keith let him know he was in the home theatre room, but didn’t move from the couch until Lance called him from somewhere in the apartment.

Keith paused the episode that had just started and followed Lance’s voice to their bedroom. In the background a song was playing – the acoustic version of The Paladins’ “Red”, their first song –, there were rose petals on the bed and candles lit all around the room. Lance had his hands in his pockets and was smiling shyly.

“What’s all that?” Keith approached Lance carefully and smiled back, brushing a stray strand of Lance’s hair out of his eyes.

“I had planned on doing this on our fifth anniversary, but I wasn’t around for it.” Lance said and Keith knew he was feeling guilty. No matter how much Keith told him he knew Lance wouldn’t always be there physically for their special dates, Lance was an old school romantic guy and felt awful about it every time he had been absent for a birthday or a holiday or any special date at all. Keith gave Lance a peck on the lips and Lance relaxed his face muscles a little. “Keith. I love you.”

“I love you too, Lance.” Keith answered and kissed him again, for a little longer this time around. Lance took one of his hands to the back of Keith’s neck and deepened the kiss a little, sliding his tongue into Keith’s mouth. Keith wrapped his hands around Lance’s neck and started to let go when Lance pulled away. Keith, with his eyes closed, whined from the loss. Lance’s chuckle and step back made Keith open his eyes. “Is someth-“ He started asking, but was cut off by Lance.

“I’ve loved you from day one and I’ve learnt to love you properly every day. We’ve build something so beautiful together. We’re friends, partners, confidents, lovers, we’re everything. I could write infinite songs about you, about us. An entire album. Ten million albums. And it still wouldn’t be enough to put into words how much I love you, Keith.” Lance said, voice trembling slightly. “So I hope this, right now, does the job.” Lance got his other hand from his pocket and got down on his knees, opening a small box. Suddenly Keith couldn’t see properly; his eyes were watering and his jaw was almost touching the floor.

“Oh my God.” Keith said and heard Lance chuckle. “Lance, oh my God?”

“Will you spend the rest of your life with me?” Lance asked and Keith couldn’t hold back his tears anymore.

“Yes!” Keith said and Lance put the ring on his finger before standing up again. “I love you so much?”

“Are you asking me?” Lance said and chuckled. Keith playfully slapped his arm. Lance held him by the waist. “I love you too.” He gave Keith a peck on the lips. “I love you, I love you, I love you.” Lance kissed Keith again.

“You weren’t at the studio, were you?” Keith asked and Lance laughed, shaking his head. “How did I not see this coming?”

“Well, you _are_ very oblivious when it comes to us, cariño. You’ve always been.” Lance laughed again and Keith chuckled, kissing him. They kissed for a while, only stopping when Keith felt his back hit the bed and needed air again. “You’re so beautiful. I’m so lucky.” Lance said, kissing Keith’s entire face. Keith chuckled, hugging Lance as tightly as he could, as if Lance could slip away from him at any second. “I’m so fucking lucky, Keith. The luckiest man in the universe.” Keith could feel his heartbeat strong and fast in his chest and butterflies in his stomach and an explosion of fireworks happening inside of him and Lance’s touch felt like glitter looked – sparkly and bright and seemingly scattered everywhere. “You’re so good, I’m so lucky, you’re so incredible and you make me so happy.” Lance was rambling and Keith knew it meant he was nervous.

“I’m so ridiculously lucky too. You make me the happiest man alive, you make me feel loved and cherished all the time and I’m so lucky to have the privilege to give you all the love I have to give.” Keith hugged Lance even tighter. “I can’t wait to spend the rest of my days with the love of my life.” Lance chuckled and got back to kissing Keith’s face and neck. Keith felt warm and loved and happy inside; Lance was clearly as happy as he was, whispering sweet words to him, because they were meant for Keith and only Keith, kissing Keith’s skin and making Keith shiver a few times by accident.

Keith took a deep breath and stared deep into Lance’s eyes. He could feel his mouth open in the biggest and most genuine smile he could form and his face wet from his and Lance’s happy tears. Lance was the best things that had happened to him. And it had really happened; and Lance had really proposed. He was engaged. After a slightly rough and messy beginning and five years of pure love, support and happiness, he was engaged; he was going to get married to the man he loved.

Not that Keith had any remaining doubts about it, but he was most definitely the luckiest man alive. And living his future beside Lance was exactly what he wanted to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> soo, this was it. i hope yall enjoyed the road. this was initially supposed to be an idea for a crack-y one shot porn fic ldfsjaofdçjs but i actually liked the idea and this is what happened out of it LÇJDSFLKJAFDIJÇDSFO that's the type of person i am omg çlfsoafjsd anyway
> 
> thank you, thank you, thank you from the deepest of my heart for all the lovely comments, for all the kudos, all the interactions with my tumblr posts, all the bookmarks. those are honestly the things that keep us writing and posting <3 
> 
> "bebê" means "babe"  
> keith is still an oblivious dumbass because that's part of his personality ldajaldfjs
> 
> one last time in this fic:  
> i made a [playlist for the fic on spotify](https://open.spotify.com/user/playlandi/playlist/2vr6vymACCES9lHyLx2Qf4?si=XlmFxYmISimyOxHSnCKHxA). some songs might not make a lot of sense at this point in time, but they're all songs that either are a part of the fic or inspired me in my creative process, so ~  
> if you want to reach out to me outside of ao3 you can do it through either [my les mis blog](https://whensunscollide.tumblr.com) or [my personal messy blog](https://marsisnotcreative.tumblr.com). i also have the link to all my other social media there!  
> also feel free to consider buying me a metaphorical coffee at ko-fi.com/playlandi if you'd like to <3
> 
> i'm posting things for the klance halloween and i have a rated E klance fic up named "you're wearing my jacket", so feel free to check those out and give 'em some love if u want to <3333


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